


Dark Paradise

by Mia_Vaan



Series: Light and Dark [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: Darth Maul (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Rewrite, Angst and Feels, Beauty and the Beast Elements, But he's trying, Eldra is awesome and deserved better, Eldra is one bad-mouthed Jedi, F/M, Hybrids, I tried to make this as realistic as possible, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse (or Sidious's A+ Parenting), Maul fails at emotional comprehension, Maul is a disaster and has a long way to go, Maul is hurting and needs a hug, Maul probably isn't the best dad, Parent Darth Maul, Possessive Behavior, Possessive Maul, Protective Maul, Sidious is a bastard, Some hurt/comfort, Stockholm Syndrome is talked about, Time Skips, Trigger Warning for Dubious Consent, Trigger Warning for mentions of sexual assault, Unplanned Pregnancy, Worldbuilding, but nothing like that actually happens, i can't believe i managed to keep this pg-13, meanwhile Eldra is an awesome mother, not your average sugar-coated Baby Fic, nothing is sugar-coated here, or romanticized, sex is mentioned but there's nothing explicit, some characters and other bits borrowed from Legends, some hades and persephone vibes, trigger warning for suicidal thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:33:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 25
Words: 78,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24594604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mia_Vaan/pseuds/Mia_Vaan
Summary: Once upon a time, an angel and a devil fell in love. It did not end well. – “Daughter of Smoke and Bone”, Laini TaylorIn which Maul is convinced by his master to keep Eldra Kaitis alive for training purposes. Naturally, feelings get involved.Book One in the Light and Dark series.
Relationships: Adi Gallia & Siri Tachi, Darth Maul & Original Female Character(s), Eldra Kaitis & Obi-Wan Kenobi, Eldra Kaitis & Original Female Character(s), Eldra Kaitis & Siri Tachi, Eldra Kaitis/Darth Maul, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Siri Tachi
Series: Light and Dark [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1777855
Comments: 61
Kudos: 81
Collections: Jedi Journals





	1. Prologue: Dark Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: All recognizable characters, settings, etc. belong to Lucasfilm and Disney. I'm just playing in their sandbox. Some dialog in this prologue has been taken from the Darth Maul comic. 
> 
> This is a story I've been planning for years, and the Clone Wars finale finally gave me the motivation to write it. Strap yourselves in; it's gonna be one hell of a ride. 
> 
> (Quick note: Maul is the same age as Eldra.)

Once upon a time, an angel and a devil fell in love.

It did not end well.

– “Daughter of Smoke and Bone”, _Laini Taylor_

\---

“Tell me, my apprentice. Do you understand now why I warned you to keep your distance from the Jedi?”

Maul fell to his knees before his master. He knew that begging for forgiveness would earn him no mercy, and only hoped that his punishment would be swift.

The rockslide had taken him off-guard, but had not killed him like the Padawan intended it to. He’d used the Force to push the rocks aside and leap in a final counterattack, but instead of impaling the Jedi on the end of his lightsaber, he’d found her instead lying unconscious on the ground by the feet of his master.

His eyes were drawn to her helpless form. Eldra Kaitis, seventeen galactic years old, a Padawan of the Jedi Order. He’d underestimated her, and it had almost cost him his life.

“Forgive me, my master,” he said. “I have deceived you.”

“There was no deception here.” Darth Sidious’s yellow, bloodshot eyes glowed beneath his dark hood. “After all, it was I who set you on this path. Did you believe you would uncover a secret to which I was not already privy?”

Maul tried not to flinch as realisation sunk in. “A trial. You were testing my loyalty. And I have failed.”

“Have you? The Sith were born in defiance,” said Sidious. “You have embraced the very nature of our Order. Rise, Darth Maul.”

The Zabrak did as he was told. “But I have still failed you. I was bested by the Padawan. Unless you mean for me to kill her now.” He looked down at Eldra, still unconscious.

The thought of striking her down when she was helpless sat uncomfortably with him. All the Jedi deserved to die, but they deserved to go down fighting. Killing a Jedi in battle was a sacred rite, and one he wished to honour. He would strike her down as she was if his master asked it of him, but he wouldn’t be happy about it.

Darth Sidious also looked down at the Rutian Twi’lek girl. “This exercise in defiance has been useful, indeed. In order to prepare yourself against the Jedi, you must learn to fight against one. To kill such a fine specimen now would be useless.”

Maul frowned. “Master?”

“We will take her,” said Sidious. “You will keep her and use her for training purposes.”

The younger Sith looked between his master and the Padawan on the ground. The prospect of fighting her again, over and over, was thrilling. It would be a risk to keep her, since they lived on the same planet as the Jedi, but then if the Jedi hadn’t been able to detect them by now…

But she had come so close to killing him. And if she escaped…

“She will be killed once we are ready to reveal ourselves.” His master’s words responded to his thoughts. “I trust you will be able to keep her under control until then.”

Maul looked at Eldra again, and nodded. “Yes, my master.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Darth Maul comic is set sometime before the Battle of Naboo, but it never says when. The only official date I could find was circa. 32BBY, so basically anytime before that within reason. For the purpose of this story, I'm saying it happened five years before Naboo.


	2. Chapter One: Awaken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some dialogue has been taken from the Darth Maul comic.

But I don’t deserve to lose my freedom in this way,

you monster

– “Home”, _Beauty and the Beast on Broadway_

\---

Eldra Kaitis awoke suddenly from her nightmare.

She’d seen it all again. The Republic transport in pieces around her, and all of its passengers dead. Including her master, Jedi Knight Leora Ori, her frail human form laying broken at Eldra’s feet, and her snow-white hair turned crimson with her own blood. 

Eldra winced at the memory of it, and struggled to release her grief into the Force. She didn’t see the fairness of it. Her master had been so close to becoming a Jedi Master; she’d given everything to the Jedi, the galaxy, only to be shot down by pirates.

Her capture in the immediate aftermath of the crash had prevented her from processing her grief. Defiant in the face of Xev Xrexus, she’d scoffed at the woman’s comical arrogance. She really thought she could get away with auctioning off a Jedi Padawan to the highest bidder? Without the Jedi Order hunting her down? Though that was nothing compared to finding herself face-to-face with a monster.

A monster that had until that day, only existed in stories and rumours that were over a thousand years old.

A monster that turned out to be her unlikely saviour.

He was a Sith no older than herself, who looked like he’d stepped right out of a Youngling’s nightmare. She’d recognised him as a Dathomirian Zabrak, Force-sensitive by their very nature, but what gave away his identity was his anger. His hate. The dark side swirled around him like an unending black hole.

Seeing him fight, seeing him use the Force so seldomly to avoid detection, had only confirmed in her mind who and what he was.

She allowed the memory to wash over her, for it was the better part of the whole experience. The night sky turning red with the coming dawn; the Sith releasing her from her bonds and giving her back her lightsaber, allowing her to defend herself against those that were hunting them both. She knew it was because he didn’t want anyone killing her before he could get the chance to, and yet she could sense something almost noble in him. He was a Sith, but he was also a warrior.

A Jedi Padawan and her most ancient enemy had fought side-by-side against their common foes, and in that moment, she’d felt something. It was like a prophecy delivered by the Force itself.

Standing with this Sith, fighting beside him… It somehow felt _right_. Like it was meant to be. It both frightened and excited her, even through the disappointment she’d felt at his instant rejection.

_“We needn’t be enemies. We don’t have to fight. You don’t have to give yourself over so completely to this darkness.”_

_“If you believe that, you are not the Jedi I thought you were.”_

_“Yeah. I thought maybe I would give you a chance to back down before you get yourself first humiliated and then killed. That’s all.”_

She’d expected the Sith to try and use his hatred against her, to unbalance her. But as they fought, she’d sensed his hatred melting away, being replaced with… excitement. Enjoyment. Even admiration.

Fighting the Sith was unlike any fight she’d ever been in. Not even sparring with her fellow Padawans gave her the same feeling.

She shook her head. She was reminiscing over fighting a _Sith_ , for Force’s sake. The Council would be mortified.

It didn’t take long for Eldra to realise that she couldn’t remember how the fight had ended. She recalled causing a rockslide, burying the Sith, but after that, nothing. It took her a few moments to realise that she didn’t recognise her surroundings.

The room was dark with no windows, a low light illuminating herself and what little there was around her. She was lying on a bed in the centre of the room, with a cabinet beside it; there was also a wardrobe and a small table, and then a door that led to what Eldra guessed was probably a refresher. There was a second door opposite her, which most likely led to the rest of… wherever she was.

Eldra looked down at herself. She was still dressed in her Jedi robes, meaning that whoever had taken her didn’t have any unsavoury intentions. Which considering the predicament she’d found herself in over the past few weeks, was the best she could’ve hoped for. She’d decided in her cell that being a Twi’lek sucked, and she wished she’d been born to an uglier race.

Her lightsaber rested on the cabinet. For a moment she was bewildered; why would her captors let her keep her lightsaber? Dwelling on the matter more, she wondered why she wasn’t in a cell somewhere. Even if the room was locked, it appeared easily escapable.

 _Appearances can be deceiving, Padawan_ , her master’s voice echoed in her mind. And the voice was right. It was too easy. There had to be a precaution, one that wasn’t immediately obvious.

And then there was the matter of her captor, or captors. Considering she’d been fighting a Sith before blacking out…

Why did he take her, when he’d had every intention of killing her?

She heard footsteps in the hallway outside her room. There was no time to set up an ambush, plus her head was still spinning from whatever had been done to her. She also noticed for the first time a small, dull pain on her left arm. A brief glance revealed a small surgical cut, and a nasty suspicion began to form in her mind.

Eldra didn’t have time to question it further, though. The door opened, but instead of the Sith, a droid entered.

It was bi-pedal, old-looking. It reminded her of Professor Huyang, the droid who had taught her how to build her lightsaber. Though its design was a later model, she guessed. Which still made it pretty old, considering that Huyang had been in the service of the Jedi Order for a thousand years.

Upon seeing her, the droid paused.

“I see you’re awake,” it said, its voice distinctly male. “A pity. You will soon wish you never woke up.”

He said it so offhandedly that it took Eldra a moment to process his words. “And what’s that supposed to mean?”

The droid approached the bed before scanning her. “Let’s put it this way: my master is the last person you’d wish to invite to a Youngling’s birthday party.”

Eldra scoffed. “Shame. I was hoping he could make me some funny balloon animals.”

The scanner beeped, and the droid inspected the results. “The chip appears to be working correctly.”

“Chip?” Eldra rubbed her hand against the cut etched into her blue skin as her nasty suspicion grew stronger. “What chip?”

“My apologies, I should have explained,” said the droid. “My master requested that I insert a slave chip into your bloodstream, to prevent you from escaping. I would have asked for your permission, but you were slightly unconscious at the time, so…”

Eldra clenched her fists, unable to push away the wave of humiliation that washed over her. She was a prisoner, after all. Her freedom was gone, and the cage that held her was one that was not so easily escapable. Not unless she wanted to explode into tiny little pieces. And while suicide was an option, she didn’t want to contemplate it unless she had no other choice.

The droid was still talking. “…Eldra Kaitis, was it? I am VN-22, and my master has programmed me to provide you with anything you need-”

“Listen, Venny,” she interrupted. “I know you droids don’t tend to understand emotion very well, but I’ve just been violated in one of the worst ways imaginable. All I want is to get out of here, and maybe impale my captor in the face on the way out. But since showing me the way out probably goes against your programming…”

“A brilliant observation,” said the droid, his monotone voice dripping with sarcasm.

“…and either trying to escape or killing my captor will cause me to explode, I guess I’ll have to settle for asking where my captor may be lurking,” she continued. “Is he not brave enough to tell me all this to my face?”

“I was about to.”

Eldra hated the way she jumped at the sound of his voice, but hated more how she wasn’t able to sense his presence before he spoke.

The Sith stood in the doorway, arms behind his back. He wasn’t wearing his cloak, though he’d replaced the shirt that had been ripped during their fight. And more annoyingly, he didn’t look any worse for wear after she’d buried him under a ton of rocks.

Seeing him standing there brought out her anger, something she’d been supressing since the first shuttle crash. Anger at the Force for taking her master away so senselessly. Anger at Xev Xrexus for the humiliation of being captured then sold to the highest bidder. Anger at herself for even _feeling_ the emotion.

But at least there was no fear. She’d felt it briefly, when the Sith had appeared before her cell and ignited his lightsaber, pointing it at her and slashing it against the cell’s force-field. But then the fear had faded, leaving in its place morbid curiosity, something that had only grown upon seeing the Sith again in the ship of the scumbag who had purchased her.

She met his gaze. “For someone who was so intent on killing me, you’re doing a pretty bad job of it. Did you get cold feet? Is butchering Jedi not everything you hoped it be?”

 _Mind your attitude, Padawan_. She heard her master’s voice again; the same words she’d repeated many times before. Leora Ori had always warned Eldra that her attitude would get her into trouble one day. But it had seemed to work in her favour before; the Sith expected her to be afraid, and her lack of fear unbalanced him. At least at first; as time went on, it was almost as if he admired her for it.

The Sith stepped into the room. “I had every intention of killing you, make no mistake of that. But then my master appeared, and suggested another option that would benefit all of us.”

Eldra remembered the cold dread that had overwhelmed her moments before she’d blacked out. If that was what his master’s presence felt like in the Force, then she didn’t want to meet him. At all.

“I don’t see how being your prisoner benefits _me_ ,” she said.

“It is my destiny to kill Jedi,” said the Sith. “You are here for me to use, in order to improve my training. Eldra Kaitis, you have the honour of playing a vital role in the Sith’s revenge against the Jedi Order.”

“Am I supposed to be flattered by that?” she snapped. She jumped off the bed and strode forwards to meet him. “Being told that I’m nothing more than your training dummy, and once you’re finished with me, you’ll go on to kill all of my friends?”

“No. I just thought saying it like that will sound nicer for you.” He shrugged. “Doesn’t really work, does it?”

“You’re a piece of bantha shit, and I’m gonna enjoy destroying you again.”

He had the nerve to chuckle. “Is that so?”

“If your master hadn’t shown up, you’d still be buried under a big pile of rocks. I don’t think he’ll be around to save you again.”

She saw the flash of fear in his eyes, and it added up with her earlier observations. He’d been afraid of being discovered by his master. Recalling the almost desperate fear she thought someone like him wouldn’t be capable of, she reaffirmed in her mind that she _definitely_ didn’t want to meet his master.

“The counterattack I made after you were unconscious would have killed you, had my master not intervened,” the Sith snarled. “You owe him your life for that.”

“Now you’re saying I should be grateful to the Sith who decided not to kill me because he wanted to keep me as some kind of training slave?” Eldra reached behind her and called her lightsaber to her hand, before igniting it. “I would’ve preferred it if he let you kill me.”

She had no intention of using it. Not yet, not until she’d determined if there was any way out of her situation alive.

Regardless, the Sith reacted swiftly; he grabbed her hand and twisted it painfully. Still not herself from what had been done to her, Eldra dropped her lightsaber; the blade retracted immediately. The Sith then used the Force to toss her back onto the bed.

The droid watched the entire thing, no emotion in its eyes. Eldra had forgotten it was even there.

When she sat up again to face him, she knew not to try anything further. He reminded her of a panther; fast, sleek, strong, deadly. She wouldn’t be able to take him again until she’d recovered from whatever his master had done to her.

“Know this, Eldra Kaitis,” he said. “My master is the one keeping you here, not me. If you kill me, the chip will not detonate. And if you _do_ manage to kill me, my master will want a new apprentice – and will consider you to be my replacement.”

Eldra refused to let him see the spike of fear that shot through her. His master was nothing more than a ghost in her mind, and yet she already knew that the Sith standing before her was the better option.

“Go screw a nerf herder.”

The Sith’s eyebrows rose. “That is not the kind of language I expected from a Jedi.”

“What can I say? I’m just full of surprises.”

He appeared almost amused. “Indeed.” He then gestured to the droid. “VN-22 will provide you with anything you need. Since I need you to be strong enough to fight, I have no intention of starving you.”

“I’m so sorry you have to go out of your way to provide me with my basic needs.”

“Once you have fully recovered, we will have our first training session.” He turned to leave her room.

After a moment, she said, “Are you gonna at least tell me your name, since I’m gonna be stuck with you?”

He paused, but didn’t turn around. “Maul. Darth Maul.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates should come once a week.


	3. Chapter Two: No Fear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Darth Maul comic can be found on YouTube here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S1ukSAU_YPA

Sometimes it’s hard to find

my way up into the clouds

– “breathin’”, _Ariana Grande_

\---

Maul meditated in his quarters, preparing himself to fight the Jedi Padawan.

Or rather, Eldra Kaitis. He felt that the Twi’lek had earned enough respect for him to use her given name.

He doubted his master would approve. Lord Sidious respected no one, simply because there was no one worthy enough to demand that respect; no one in the galaxy who could match his power. But even if there was, Maul doubted that his master would respect them. He would sooner destroy them.

Maul wanted to destroy Eldra; he wanted to fulfil his destiny and take revenge against the Jedi. Every time he doubted himself, he would remember what he had found at the Sith Temple. He would remember seeing the bodies, breathing in their ashes and feeling every single one of their deaths at the hands of the Jedi.

But even that memory was starting to grow weaker. Instead his head was filled with the memory of fighting her, and before that, fighting alongside her. The possibility he’d considered before, discarded when he’d been attempting to keep his hunt a secret, danced through his mind once again. The thrilling prospect turning her to the dark side and making her an ally; an assassin under the Sith’s control.

There was certainly enough anger in her. And her cunning, her strength, her defiance… They were all the traits of a Sith.

He had a startling thought, that perhaps they were also the traits of a Jedi; that Jedi and Sith were more alike than he realised. But he buried that thought immediately.

Maul rose to his feet and called his lightsaber to his hand. For the time being, he would only use her for training. And if later there was a chance she could be turned, then he would have to do so carefully. If his master suspected him of attempting to train his own apprentice with the goal of supplanting him…

The droid appeared outside his room. “You summoned me, master?”

“Prepare the training room. Has the Padawan eaten?”

“No, sir. She refused to consume the meal I gave her.”

Maul narrowed his eyes. “Refused?” He hadn’t considered that she’d refuse to eat and therefore deprive him of a worthy sparring partner.

“She didn’t say so outright, but considering she threw the food at my head, I put two and two together.”

The grip on his lightsaber tightened. “Prepare the training room, anyway. I will teach her that it would be wise to keep her strength up.”

The droid nodded and left. Maul took a few moments to prepare himself before he too left, making his way to Eldra’s room.

She was sat in the middle of her bed, meditating. He felt a surge of excitement, the same feeling that had taken him off guard when he’d first laid eyes on her. He wondered if he’d always have that feeling before fighting her.

He ignited one end of his lightsaber and pointed it at her. “Get up. It is time for our first training session.”

Eldra opened one eye. “I haven’t eaten. Don’t you want me at top form before we have our rematch?”

“The droid informed me that you refused your meal,” Maul snarled. “If you wish to fight me without your strength, then that is your choice. But you will still fight me regardless. You will soon learn that I will not go easy on you.”

The Padawan opened her other eye and glared at him. “You can’t force me.”

He growled. “These comforts you have can be taken away. If you wish to be treated like a slave, then by all means, I will treat you as such.”

“Stop pretending I’m anything but a slave to you!” Eldra snapped. But she grabbed her lightsaber and stormed past him. “Fine. Let’s get this over with.”

She spun on her heel, crossed her arms and waited for him to lead the way, the glare never leaving her face. Maul glared back, before leading her to the training room.

The room was large and contained all sorts of equipment, both advanced and ridiculously simple. Lord Sidious had spared no expense in ensuring that his apprentice would receive the training necessary for his role as a Jedi killer.

Eldra paused in surprise, and took a moment to observe her surroundings.

The droid was still in the room. He pressed a few buttons on the control panel, and several platforms appeared; some from the walls, others rose up out of the floor. Maul nodded his approval to the droid; he wanted to be challenged by the terrain as well as the Padawan. The droid nodded in return before disappearing through another door.

Maul sealed the door behind them to ensure Eldra couldn’t escape, before he walked into the centre of the room. “Prepare yourself. I may not wish to kill you, but I cannot guarantee that I won’t strike you down by accident, should you misstep.”

“So nice of you to be considerate.” She followed him, and when she was stood before him, ignited her lightsaber.

The rush, the thrill… It all came back to him. He smiled, and waited. This time, he would let her be the first to strike.

After a few moments of silent anticipation, she did.

Her movements were controlled, fuelled by a fury he didn’t think a Jedi was capable of. And yet, she wasn’t fighting as well as she was on the Moon of Drazkel.

It was still exhilarating, fighting her once again. And like before, he could sense her fearlessness, her resignation. An acceptance of her fate. But perhaps, that was what felt off. He was the one initiating every move, every jump was made by him with her following… Apart from the first strike, she was using Form III, Soresu; only reacting, defending, making no attempt to counterattack.

And that enraged him.

He strengthened his attacks, knocking her around and bearing down on her harder until he had her on the floor. She struggled against him, holding her weapon with only one hand. With one final, brutal strike, he knocked the lightsaber out of her grasp, sending it flying across the room. It switched off when it clattered to the floor.

Eldra gritted her teeth. There was a scorch mark on her arm where his lightsaber had gotten too close to her, and her body was dotted with bruises.

She was beaten, defeated, with the marks to prove it. Seeing her in such a state should have given him great satisfaction.

It didn’t.

Maul pointed his lightsaber at her. “You are beaten.”

Eldra stared up at him. “Go on then. Finish it. Strike me down.”

So, that was what she’d been hoping for; that he would forget about her purpose in the heat of battle, and kill her. She’d been longing for escape through death.

“You have no weapon,” he said. “Killing a Jedi with no lightsaber is a hollow victory.”

She reached behind her and called back her lightsaber, but she didn’t ignite it. “There. Happy now?”

Knowing her intentions, he still didn’t raise his weapon against her. But he closed his eyes and allowed himself to imagine it; imagine killing her.

He saw himself driving his lightsaber into her gut. He saw the tears rolling down her cheeks as she took her last breaths. He saw her lightsaber fall to the floor, never to be used again. He saw her eyes close as she slumped lifelessly to the ground. And as he stood over her body, triumphant, he felt…

…empty.

He thought he would feel satisfied, fulfilled, even in his imaginings. But there was nothing. Instead of feeling more certain of his destiny and the roll he would play in his master’s plans, he felt the opposite.

Maul hadn’t foreseen this. Perhaps if he killed more Jedi, killed them for the rest of his life… But as he imagined that, the feeling increased until it was so vast it felt like it was swallowing his soul.

Would he have to do it for real?

His eyes opened, and Eldra Kaitis was alive again, staring up at him. She hadn’t even taken advantage of his momentary lapse.

As he stared down at her, he contemplated making his thoughts reality. Just to see if the feeling was real or not. But as he lifted his lightsaber, the feeling increased tenfold, as if in warning. It was like the Force itself was telling him that if he struck her down, the emptiness would stay with him for the rest of his life.

His hands began to shake violently.

With a roar of anger, he spun and threw his lightsaber across the room. It sliced through two platforms before landing, extinguishing itself on impact.

He stood staring at it, taking in deep breaths.

Maul couldn’t contemplate what had happened; what he’d discovered. If he couldn’t get any satisfaction from killing Jedi, what he’d been training for his whole life… then what purpose did he have?

\---

Eldra ached all over.

The plan had been simple; she wouldn’t eat, throw the fight and hope the Sith would be worked up enough to kill her. Of course, it wasn’t that simple. He’d restrained himself, though not without a moment where he’d clearly contemplated the notion.

What surprised her was his actions afterwards. Throwing his own lightsaber away, and then roaring with anger that she quickly realised wasn’t aimed at her, but himself.

His back was turned to her. It would be so easy to cut him down.

But he hadn’t done the same. She’d been without her weapon, and he’d refused to strike her. Granted, he had no intention of killing her anyway, but still… And there was also the lingering fear of his master, of what he would do to her if she killed his apprentice.

Eldra put her weapon away and heaved herself off the floor. Her reactions gained no attention from the Sith, so she walked across the room to what appeared to be a medical unit. The scorch on her arm needed tending to.

She pulled herself up to sit on the unit before taking a closer look at the burn. It wasn’t that bad; she’d seen worse in the training rooms at the Temple. All it needed was a bacta patch.

Before she could begin to look for one, the Sith appeared before her. He reached into the cupboard next to her, his face coming too close to hers for her liking. If he noticed her disapproval at his proximity, he didn’t show it. After rummaging around, he brought out a bacta patch. Eldra looked him over; she couldn’t see any wounds or injuries that would require a patch…

Maul suddenly took her arm and held it out. Eldra was too shocked to react or pull it back, and could only watch, speechless, as he applied the patch to her wound.

So many questions tumbled around in her mind, but she couldn’t find her voice in order to ask them. And she couldn’t bring herself to make any snarky remarks.

The patch applied, Maul stepped back and held out his hand. His lightsaber flew to it without fail. “When you are healed, we will fight again. I highly suggest you eat the food that’s given to you.”

And then he left the training room, not even bothering to escort her back to her own quarters. She supposed he didn’t need to; it wasn’t like she could escape.

Retreating back to her room could wait. Eldra allowed herself a moment to think over what had happened.

He wasn’t what she imagined a Sith would be like. Well, he looked the part, and mostly acted the part, too. But he had moments; little ones that showed her there was more to him than that. He was like a bounty hunter with a code; a profession that wasn’t noble, but some chose to have their own sense of honour, even if it was twisted.

She wasn’t about to proclaim him a paragon of virtue by any means. He was still a Sith; still a monster. He’d made his intentions to murder the Jedi very clear. But he’d also allowed her to defend herself when they were under attack, and had then given her a fair fight. He’d refused to strike her down without her weapon. And while she was practically a slave to him and his master, she’d heard what most of the other buyers at the auction had planned for her. Her current circumstances were almost paradise compared to the other options.

Eldra still planned on escaping. She just had another way of doing it; one that wasn’t clear, but had a rough starting point.

In her early apprenticeship to Master Ori, the woman had talked down a gunman who’d threatened to shoot up a crowded market on Lothal. She had done so without anyone firing a single shot, all because she’d sympathised with him. By understanding why he was doing it and reasoning with him, she’d convinced him to turn himself over to the local security forces peacefully. He hadn’t been a bad guy; just an ordinary man who’d been hurt too many times, and thought the only option was striking out at the world that had been nothing but cruel to him.

If she could begin to do that with Maul, see if there was anything in him worth sympathising or reasoning with…

Eldra held no delusions. It wouldn’t be as easy as her master made it look, and it wouldn’t be as quick. But she had limited options, and her survival – along with possibly the survival of the entire Jedi Order – depended on it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Due to the lack of response to this story, I'm thinking about taking it down in order to potentially rework it. But I'm not sure if I will yet or not, hence the update. I don't know if people aren't reading it because it centers around a one-off comics character who not many people will have heard of, or because it's not that great. If it's the latter, then it'll definitely need reworking (but I'll probably try and rework the story anyway if it's the former, to try and get people interested). 
> 
> I guess what I'm trying to say is, if this story suddenly disappears, don't panic. I'll repost it again. Also, I may need a beta reader to bounce ideas off of, so if anyone is up for it (or knows of any Star Wars beta readers), then let me know.


	4. Chapter Three: Into the Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some lines borrowed from the Darth Maul comic and a couple from the Clone Wars episode "The Lawless".

No pain could be deeper,

no life could be cheaper

– “If I Can’t Love Her”, _Josh Groban_

\---

Eldra sighed whilst throwing and catching her lightsaber impatiently. The training room was set up, and Maul was late.

She’d quickly discovered, in the weeks that had followed her capture and first sparring session, that there were limits to how much her Jedi training could help her cope with her situation.

Patience was never a virtue she’d been fully acquainted with outside of lightsaber combat, and what little she had of it was being tested. Time was crawling along slower than she thought possible, with the days feeling like weeks and the weeks feeling like months. Being faced with the same walls every day felt like a tedious torture; they were slowly crushing her from all angles with no means of escape. She was turning into a caged animal, and often found herself pacing in her quarters when she had nothing else to do. Meditation could only entertain her for so long.

In a way, her training sessions with Maul were the only exciting parts of each day. She’d gotten to the point of actually looking forwards to sparring with a monster of the dark side, and she hated it.

Controlling her hate, her anger and her fear was growing harder. She would use calming techniques and tell herself that things could be worse; she wasn’t locked up in some cell and covered in chains, nor was she being physically or mentally tortured on a daily basis. But the fact remained – one she couldn’t ignore no matter how hard she tried – that she had no idea what the next day would bring, especially when her life was in someone else’s hands.

Eldra didn’t even know how much of what Maul had told her was true. For the time being, all he seemed to want was a sparring partner; someone he could use to better himself. If that was true, then the lack of torture made sense from a pragmatic point of view. It was in his best interests to keep her at top form, so torturing her would be counterproductive.

Most days, she managed to keep calm with this mindset; telling herself that her situation could be worse. But some days, the stress would get to her and she would come close to giving into her panic.

She was constantly suspicious as to why Maul hadn’t interrogated her for information about the Jedi, which led her to suspect all sorts of horrible theories as to why he wouldn’t need the information. Theories ranging from his Sith master being a former Jedi or even currently pretending to be a Jedi. That last theory was terrifying to contemplate, especially since it instantly made any of the Jedi Masters (the only ones who would be strong enough to hide in plain sight) suspects, even Master Yoda.

In the face of something like that, the thought of Maul eventually deeming her useless and slaughtering her was nothing in comparison. At least then she would be free.

All the horrific possibilities that haunted her, added to just how much she didn’t know about what the Sith had planned for her… On those bad days, she was almost swept up in the urgency of what she had to do. She was desperate to escape and tell the Jedi that the Sith had returned, that they were planning something, that they could have already infiltrated the Order…

But the only plan she had required patience – which, aforementioned, she didn’t have much of to begin with. In this case, though, she would have to listen to her inner voice that sounded like her master, and push herself to her limits. Because Eldra knew that waiting for the right moment was crucial.

If she acted too soon, or even gave Maul too much sympathy all at once, he’d lash out and there’d be little to no chance of it working again. And he’d already rejected an attempt to reason with him, right before their first battle on the moon.

_“We needn’t be enemies. We don’t have to fight. You don’t have to give yourself over so completely to this darkness.”_

_“If you believe that, you are not the Jedi I thought you were.”_

But in that moment, she’d been 99% certain it wouldn’t work. Now, if she waited for the right opportunity, and showed sympathy gradually, little moments at a time…

There was no guarantee it would work. But she had to try. At the very least, he could get so mad at her that he’d strike her down in anger.

Eldra had already started to be somewhat nice, in order to “soften” him up before the reasonings and sympathies began. She’s cooperated, eaten when she was told to and trained with him when requested. She still snarked at him constantly, because she had her limits, but since he found her snarking amusing instead of irritating, this worked in her favour.

She looked down at her lightsaber and recalled all the times they had fought. Either he would win, or she would, or it would end in a stalemate. A few times, she’d intentionally slipped so he would kill her accidentally, but he always stopped before he could.

The thought of him killing her didn’t scare her. But whenever she thought about igniting her own lightsaber and striking herself down… She couldn’t do it. Did that make her cowardly, or brave? She hadn’t decided, but liked to think it was the latter. So long as she was alive, there was a chance she could escape and warn the Jedi.

Eldra pushed that thought away and began to entertain herself by balancing her lightsaber horizontally on her forehead.

This was how the droid found her when he walked into the training room. “My master has returned from his mission, but he will not be training today.”

“You couldn’t have told me that sooner, Venny?” Eldra lifted the lightsaber up with the Force before snatching it out of the air.

“Must you insist on calling me that?”

“VN-22 is a mouthful, so yes.”

Venny let out the droid equivalent of a sigh. “Master Maul does not wish to be disturbed.”

“Is he sulking because he still hasn’t killed any Jedi? Forgive me for not caring.”

The droid looked around, as if expecting someone to be hiding in the shadows, before moving closer to Eldra. “His master is most displeased with him.”

Eldra’s eyebrows rose. “Why? Did he not meet the Sith’s maiming quota, or something?”

“I do not know what his mission entailed, but he failed,” said Venny. “And his master punished him for it. I am advising you not to go anywhere near Master Maul until he has recovered. The last time this happened, I went to ask him a question and he cut me in half. It was a week before he could repair me. Do you know how many holodramas I missed during that time?”

“Not enough. You’re obsessed.” She sighed. “I guess training won’t be happening anytime soon. What am I supposed to do until then?”

“I hear holodramas are splendid time killers.”

“You’re hilarious.”

“Ha-ha.” Venny began to walk towards the door. “I would ask you to help me clean the apartment, but I already know what your answer will be. I thought Jedi were supposed to help those less fortunate…” He left the training room without a backwards glance.

Eldra jumped down from her seat on the platform, and was about to make her way back to her room when a thought occurred to her. Venny had implied rather strongly that Maul was hurt. She guessed that he wasn’t the type of person to ask for help; that would show weakness. But if she offered to help?

This could be the moment she needed to begin her plan.

She retrieved some bacta patches from the medical unit before making her way towards Maul’s quarters. She’d never been inside them, and wondered what they’d be like.

When she reached the door, she took a moment to debate how to approach the situation. She could dive straight into the sympathetic angle, but that would make him suspicious immediately. A cautious approach would give him the idea that she was afraid of him, which she wasn’t. Striding in like she owned the place with her attitude turned up to eleven would probably get her head bitten off (or decapitated off, more likely).

In the end, she decided on the “I don’t care about you” approach. And thought it best not to enter the room right away.

She knocked on his door and opened it without waiting for a response. Neither did she wait for him to talk first. “Venny said you were back, and implied you were hurt. So, I thought you’d want these.” She used the Force to levitate the bacta patches, and floated them into his room before letting them drop to the floor. “I’m bored when we don’t fight, so hurry up and get better.”

“Leave.” It was all he said. He was resting on his bed, and his yellow eyes glowed in the darkness of his quarters.

Yet in the dim light, she could see the pain in his posture, despite his efforts to hide it. And she could see the extent of his injuries. It looked like he’d been struck by lightning, more than once. She recalled suddenly that the Sith were rumoured to have the ability to create lightning with the Force, and weaponize it.

His master had punished him by torturing him with blasts of lightning. At this realisation, Eldra softened her demeanour.

“Why would you choose the dark side if this is what you have to endure on a regular basis?” she couldn’t help but ask.

He chuckled, but darkly. “The promise of power outweighs the pain I must endure in order to earn it.”

“So, what? You just woke up one day and decided you wanted to be a powerful egomaniac? Is getting electrocuted all the time even worth it?”

“Yes.” She swore he didn’t sound so certain, but he pressed on before she could contemplate it. “And it was not a decision on my part. I was chosen by my master.”

Some things started to add up. “How old were you?”

“I don’t think that’s any of your concern.”

Eldra leaned against the threshold, arms crossed. “I’m bored. Humour me.”

He was silent for a moment, before telling her, “I was young. Three, perhaps. I do not remember, but my master said that he found me on the streets of Iridonia, begging for scraps. He saw my potential and took me to become his apprentice. He saved me from the squanders; enlightened me of my true destiny.”

She frowned. “Iridonia? No, you can’t be from there.”

Maul snarled. “You cannot presume to know me better than my master does!”

“Then your master lied to you,” she said, not caring how he’d react. “Being a Sith, I imagine lying should come easily to you. And I know what I’m talking about, because I’ve seen those tattoos before. My master and I once met a Zabrak from Dathomir who grew up in the Clan of the Nightbrothers, and escaped. The Nightbrothers are enslaved to Dathomir’s ruling Clan: the Nightsisters. I learned all about them in my history lessons back at the Temple.”

The Sith before her was silent as he listened, but she could sense his impatience and his rising anger. His yellow eyes narrowed when she finished. “It does not matter where I came from. What matters is what I have become; the power that I now wield, thanks to my master and the dark side of the Force.”

But Eldra couldn’t help filling in the gaps in his past. Like she told him, she knew of the Dathomirian cult; she knew that the women were dominant and had enslaved the Zabrak males that shared their planet. And she knew that most Dathomirians, if not all of them, were Force-sensitive.

The planet was a hotspot for the dark side of the Force. It would be an ideal world for a Sith Lord to visit in order to seek an apprentice. The Nightsisters would never offer up one of their own, but would happily part with a Nightbrother. And a Sith Lord would want someone young; someone he could corrupt from an early age, and groom into an apprentice who would never betray him. A child raised on the dark side wouldn’t understand any other way of living; wouldn’t know that their life could be better.

And if all that was true, then Maul didn’t ask the Nightsisters to hand him over. Maul didn’t choose to be taken by his master. Maul didn’t ask to be trained in the dark side of the Force. And she doubted that he was free to leave his life as a Sith. He didn’t know it, or even understand it, but he was as much a captive of his master as she was.

And just like that, the sympathy towards him became genuine. There was no need to force it.

Eldra stepped into his room. “If you were really that young… then the decision to join the dark side wasn’t yours. Your master made it for you – and the Nightsisters, if that is where you came from. But your master made you this way. Don’t you want to make your own choices? Be who you make yourself to be?”

“Silence!” he snarled. “You think you know me?!”

“I only know the monster your master has turned you into,” she said. “But I’m trying to look past that and see if there’s anyone underneath worth knowing.” A part of her knew she was moving too fast, but the words kept coming. “You’re a prisoner here, just like me. The only difference is you’ve been conditioned to think this is your only purpose in life, when there’s so much more out there.”

Maul leapt to his feet, ignoring his injuries in his anger. “This is my purpose in life! This is what I was born to do! And I won’t have some Jedi… infecting me with their light!”

He reached out with his hand, calling on the Force. Eldra suddenly felt his dark presence against her mind, trying to break in, and the pressure caused her to instinctively strengthen her mental shields. Finding herself frozen in place, she quickly weighed her options. She could let him tire himself out trying to break in, but then she didn’t really know how strong he was. If he managed to force his way into her mind, the pain would be unbearable.

Her other option was risky, but it was something her master had taught her. And it followed the military belief that the best defence was a swift _offence_.

“ _In order to look into another’s mind, you must lower your own mental defences,_ ” Master Ori had told her. “ _So, to save yourself from a mental attack, you must first let your attacker into your mind; let them believe they have won. This way, it spares you the pain it would cause if your attacker were to force their way in. But before you do this, remember to lock away any secrets you do not wish for them to see, in the deepest depths of your mind. Then, the moment you feel them inside, follow them back into their own mind in a counterattack. This will catch them off-guard and force them to retreat from your mind immediately._ ”

Resolved in what she needed to do, Eldra took a moment to lock away anything she didn’t want Maul to see; the secrets of the Jedi, and some personal memories that were dear to her. Then, when she was ready, she lowered her defences and let him slip inside.

She fought against the wave of discomfort it caused, letting such a dark presence into her mind. When she knew he was inside, she lifted her hand up and mimicked him, following his presence back to his own mind and slipped in with ridiculous ease.

The two-way connection lasted only moments.

And in those moments, the darkness in Maul’s mind almost overwhelmed her. She grounded herself so she wouldn’t be swallowed up completely, before the Force burst around them with power she’d never felt before. Eldra was thrown backwards, flying out of Maul’s room and hitting the wall of the hallway.

She didn’t get up right away. It had all happened so fast, and she was trying to process what she’d experienced. Because in the short time she was connected to Maul, she felt everything he was feeling. All of his emotions, all at once, which were just as overwhelming as the darkness.

His anger was the loudest. And with anger came hate; irrational, directed at everything, even himself. The fear was more subtle, but there. If that was all she found, she would’ve said his mind was like an untamed animal’s.

But the anger, the hate, and the fear all came together to form something she didn’t expect. She would’ve thought that with all those emotions raging within him, his mind would be loud and violent. It wasn’t.

Instead, those emotions combined created a deep, soul-crushing emptiness.

Alongside her master, she’d visited the vast deserts of Jakku and the frozen wastelands of Hoth. And while there was life, that didn’t mean they weren’t basically empty; both were deprived of community or any meaningful connections. Yet neither of those compared to the shattering _loneliness_ she felt in Maul’s mind.

And if that was how she felt just _touching_ his mind for only a few moments, she couldn’t even begin to imagine _living_ with a mind like his.

\---

When Maul reached out to her with the Force, he didn’t really know what he was trying to do. All he knew was that he was hurt, he was being cornered by his enemy, and she needed to both leave and suffer for the Jedi lies that were leaving her mouth.

Sidious would look into the mind of his victims and force them to relive their most painful memory. Maul decided on this course of action as he attempted to enter her mind. He was met with resistance, which was expected, and he kept pushing against her until she relented.

She did so quicker than he expected. Maul didn’t think this was suspicious, but in hindsight, he should have.

Though perhaps this mishap could be excused due to being almost blinded by the sheer amount of _light_ in Eldra’s mind.

When the initial shock wore off, he found that he could feel all of her emotions. The only one that was familiar to him was anger, and that was buried under other emotions that were foreign; happiness, compassion… They were constantly at the forefront of her mind, keeping her sane, giving her things to live for in the face of her imprisonment…

Her mind shone with a radiance he’d never seen. It was strong. It was warm. It was comforting. It was peaceful. It was _full_.

It was too much.

Then he felt her presence entering _his_ mind, and suddenly he realised that was why she’d let him in so easily: so he could drop his defences and leave him vulnerable to attack. He could feel the Force swirling around him in the moments when they were tied to one another, and the sensation was almost frightening.

Maul quickly retreated from her mind, kicked her out of his, and the connection broke with a _snap_.

The swirling Force exploded around them, sending Maul flying back onto his bed. He was content to stay there and let himself recover, but then the emptiness and loneliness he’d smothered with anger and hate resurfaced, seeming stronger when compared to the light he had touched.

It made him want to do the unthinkable – reach out and touch her mind again. Reach out towards the light.

Maul looked towards her. She was on the floor outside his doorway, and staring at him with wide eyes. He wondered what she’d seen; what she’d felt. Then, without saying a word, she turned and hurried back to her own quarters.

Something deep within him wanted to scream and beg for her to come back to him, but he restrained himself. He was a Sith; the apprentice to Darth Sidious. He would not beg, and he knew that if he wanted to continue on the path towards his destiny, it would be wise for him to forget this ever happened. He would need to bury the sensation he’d felt at touching her mind; touching the light. It was what Sidious would want.

But he didn’t want to.

_“Don’t you want to make your own choices?”_

He clutched his head and shook it violently. “No! Your words hold no power over me! Far above, far below, we don’t know where we’ll fall. Far above, far below, what once was great is rendered small. Far above…”

Maul repeated the mantra over and over. The darkness within him that came with those words attempted to smother out his desire to touch the light again, but a deeper part of him latched onto the lingering feelings left over from the connection and refused to let go.

_“Don’t you want to make your own choices?”_

“No!” He banged his fists against his injuries, using the pain to fuel his hatred. “There is no choice, there is only destiny!” He screwed his eyes shut. “Peace is a lie. There is only Passion. Through Passion I gain Strength. Through Strength I gain Power. Through Power I gain Victory. Through Victory my chains are Broken. The Force shall free me.”

The path of the Sith was the true path to freedom; to becoming the master of his fate. Her words were meaningless.

And yet…

The emptiness that constantly ate away at him had felt… less empty, when he’d touched her light.

He was distracted from unravelling what that revelation could mean by the beeping of his commlink. Maul sighed. What had occurred would need to be ignored for the time being, for he had more important matters to attend to.

His master was summoning him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is late. 
> 
> I've decided to keep going with this story, and for that, I want to thank my new beta reader, Artemis Arrow. This story is already in a much better place thanks to their helpful advice and comments. :)


	5. Chapter Four: Seconds and Hours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains references to the events of the novel 'Maul: Lockdown'.

I see your monsters,

I see your pain

– “Monsters”, _Katie Sky_

\---

When Eldra woke up the next morning, she couldn’t sense Maul.

The dark presence that usually lingered in the apartment was absent, and after the events of the previous day, Eldra was relieved. She hadn’t known how Maul was going to react to her actions; hadn’t known if he was going to punish her in some form. Given that she was the Sith’s captive, she’d grown morbidly used to expecting the worse, but she’d still dreaded it.

Her relief was short lived when she quickly reminded herself (and berated herself for being and idiot and forgetting) that Maul wasn’t going to stay gone. In the weeks she’d been his captive, he’d left the apartment a number of times, and Venny had informed her that it was mostly to go and speak with his master. Though occasionally it was to go on hunting expeditions.

“But I cannot imagine he would bother himself with those anymore,” the droid had said, “since you are now here to keep him entertained.”

Eldra knew without a doubt that some kind of hunting expedition wasn’t the reason he’d left. She had a dreadful thought that Maul had gone to his master to confer with him on the matter of herself; what was to be done about her after the previous day’s incident. Again, she’d grown used to the sense of dread that lingered every second she was a prisoner, but Maul’s sudden absence paired with what had occurred… The dread increased.

As she left her quarters to go and find something to eat, Eldra struggled to take in deep, calming breaths. When the breathing failed to help her find peace, she began to recite the Jedi Code under her breath. “There is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no passion, there is serenity. There is no chaos, there is harmony. There is no death, there is the Force.”

The familiar words were like a balm on her soul, soothing her into a more comfortable state of mind. At the very least, she’d stopped trembling by the time she walked into the apartment’s main area. She could see Venny in the kitchen, already cooking the flatcakes she’d made a habit of consuming first thing in the morning.

After taking a seat on the sofa, she picked up the apartment’s shared datapad and looked up the latest holojournal. On the third day of her captivity, she’d tried using it to send a message to the Jedi Temple, only to be informed by Venny that it had been specifically programmed to prevent her from doing so by any means. The only means of communications in the apartment was Maul’s commlink.

And her slave chip had been programmed to detonate if she tried using it.

Eldra stopped reading when Venny approached with her plate of flatcakes, which he placed on the small table in front of her. “Thanks,” she said. “Where did Cranky Pants go?”

“Master Maul has left on an extended mission,” said the droid. “He does not know when he will return. I am to attend to your needs until he comes back.”

This caught Eldra’s attention. An extended mission? What kind of missions did Sith need to carry out, if not to hunt Jedi? “What kind of mission?”

“That is classified.”

“Shocker.” Eldra let herself relax, if only slightly. If Maul was on an extended mission and unlikely to return anytime soon, then she had time to think of a way to avoid the potential punishment he had planned for her. But she wondered if Maul was even planning on punishing her for the incident in his quarters. If he was, then surely, he would have dished it out before leaving? Unless his mission was time sensitive, but even then, the most basic punishments didn’t take that long.

Though regardless of whether or not he intended to punish her, she had time to herself without the worry that she was being watched by the Sith. (The droid mostly kept to himself, but she was smart enough to not drop her guard around him.) It was valuable time she needed to use wisely. Namely, to think up a potential new plan, since she was 99% sure her plan to sympathise with her enemy had backfired, even if it had led to her sympathising with him for real. But she doubted it would work again.

Eldra ate her flatcakes in silence. She was used to the quiet, because Maul wasn’t much of a talker outside the training room. But she was surprised that despite the Sith’s absence, the atmosphere still felt… tense.

She wouldn’t miss him, she told herself. His absence would allow her room to breathe.

Many months later, she was forced to admit that she _did_ miss him. Or at least, she missed kicking his Sith Lord butt in the training room.

It was the loneliness that came with being trapped in a single apartment with nothing but an annoying droid to keep her company. The circumstances made her long for the companionship of even her worst enemy.

Some days she was able to keep herself calm and controlled through meditation and lightsaber practise against the training droids. Other days she felt like the walls were closing in on her, and she wanted to tear her headtails out from sheer frustration. It was a small blessing she could still do some of the things that she used to do back in the Temple; the aforementioned meditation and training, she could research on the datapad, and for the first time in years she was on top of all the latest holojournal updates.

But she missed the fresh air. She missed swimming in the Room of a Thousand Fountains. And she missed meeting up with her friends.

Her thoughts constantly dwelled on her two closest friends, Obi-Wan and Siri. They’d been on an extended mission to Mandalore when Eldra and her master had left for their own mission. She wondered if they were still out there, running for their lives. She wondered if they’d returned and discovered one of their oldest friends was missing.

She wondered if both of them were even alive.

With Maul gone, it didn’t take her long to start testing her boundaries. Though she knew she wouldn’t be able to make an actual escape attempt, thanks to the slave chip, giving herself options would be wise in case her circumstances changed in the future. She memorised every inch of the apartment (which wasn’t hard, given how long she had been there with no change to her environment) and mapped it out in her mind for weaknesses. Maul’s Sith master, she found, had been very thorough in eliminating any breaches; there was no way for her to send a message or get help. The water drainage system was filtered, and the air vents were too small for her to crawl through.

The glass window that looked out over Coruscant appeared to be shatter-proof, or it was re-enforced to ridiculous degrees. She tried signalling people driving by the windows, but they never paid her any mind. It took her an embarrassingly long time to realise that the windows were made from one-way glass; she could see the outside world, but no one could see her. And since no one could hear her yelling for help, she concluded that the building was sound-proof, as well.

She tried calling out with the Force in case anyone in the Temple could sense her. Master Yoda at least would be powerful enough to hear her calls. But no one came, which had her convinced that Maul’s master had used some kind of Force trick to keep them hidden from prying Force-sensitives, and prevent anyone from investigating the building. It was the only explanation she could come up with as to why the Jedi couldn’t detect their oldest enemy living on the same planet as them.

With no immediate way of escape, she could do nothing but wait.

During the time she wasn’t being forced to watch holodramas with Venny (which she considered a worse fate than being forced to act as a training partner for a Sith apprentice), she contemplated her captivity. She wondered if she was a bad Jedi for not trying to escape every second of the day; for cooperating with her captors.

_Patience, Padawan_ , her master’s voice reminded her. _There is no shame in doing what you must to survive. You cannot always find a way out of a situation by fighting. Sometimes, you must wait for one to arise_.

But as time dragged on, and no one came for her, she became resigned to the possibility of never returning to her old life in the Temple. The likelihood of being found was decreasing by the day, and her hopes of becoming a Jedi Knight were fading as well. It hit her one day that she was never going back, and watching the Coruscant sunset with tears in her eyes, she briefly mourned her old life and the Jedi she might have been, before releasing her grief into the Force.

Obi-Wan’s master, Qui-Gon Jinn, always encouraged the Padawans not to focus on the past or the future, but to live in the present moment; the here-and-now, surrounded by the living Force. And that was what she needed to do. She couldn’t dwell on her past nor a future that might have been. She needed to stay focussed on her current circumstances and _survive_.

Even if that meant making conversation with a droid that clearly hated her.

“How old are you, Venny?”

Their talks had become routine. The droid was standing in the kitchen, cooking her food, while she was sat on the sofa reading the latest holojournal. There were no mentions of what the Jedi were up to; no mentions of her disappearance. The Jedi didn’t normally reveal their comings and goings to the press, but it still stung that no one outside of the Temple knew of her existence or that she’d been taken…

Venny didn’t correct her on his name. He’d resigned himself to the nickname. “I do not know. My memory has been wiped a number of times. Obviously, I cannot remember how many times it was wiped. But I have no knowledge of where I came from.”

“Oh. Sorry,” she said. “It’s a little bit like that with me. I don’t know who my family were. All I know is that I was born on Ryloth and I left when I was little under a year old. I can’t even remember what my parents looked like.”

In that way, she supposed she was like Maul; given up to an ancient order to train in the ways of the Force, growing up devoted to a higher purpose. And, uncomfortably, she realised that like Maul, the fate had been chosen for her, and wasn’t something she chose for herself.

She didn’t regret it, though. And there was a huge difference between being raised to keep the peace and being warped into a killing machine.

_Warped into a killing machine_. The implications of that hit her suddenly, and she wanted to slap herself for not realising sooner. From what little had been taught in history lessons at the Jedi Temple, the training methods of the Sith didn’t just border on torture, they _were_ torture. During the great Jedi-Sith wars, captive Jedi were tortured to the point that they either died or turned to the dark side. And it was theorised that any children who were taken by the Sith also endured the same training.

Meaning that Maul was tortured as a child.

Her sympathy for him increased tenfold. He’d had no friends like she had, nor experienced the compassion of a caretaker. Eldra was taken by the desire to be a friend to him, to show him the compassion that had been sorely lacking in his life, but hesitated to act on it. Because there was a strong chance that Maul would reject any efforts she made to do so.

“The Jedi taking Younglings away from their families definitely does not sound cruel at all,” Venny snarked.

His words pulled Eldra out of her thoughts. “Not by force; it’s the choice of the families to give their children up to the Jedi,” she corrected him. Though thinking on it some more, she had to admit that it was always strongly advised by the Republic that families give up their Force-sensitive children to the Jedi – advice that bordered on pressure.

If Maul had been born within the Republic, would he have been brought to the Temple? And given their similar age, would she have met him? Befriended him?

“It certainly explains your accent, though,” said Venny, interrupting her thoughts again. “It is from Coruscant instead of Ryloth.”

Eldra raised an eyebrow at him. “I don’t even know how to respond to that random observation, so I’ll just nod my head and pretend you said something interesting.”

“I cannot believe I am saying this, but I miss Master Maul. At least he never talked back to me.”

“Oh no, he prefers to Force-push you or cut you in half to show his irritation.” Eldra rolled her eyes.

She was tempted to ask the droid about Maul. How long had he known the young Sith? Did Maul have any interests outside of fighting, hating the Jedi and killing things? She’d snooped around a few times and found that Maul didn’t have much in the way of personal belongings; just clothes and other practical things.

Instead of asking, she let the droid be. He probably wouldn’t remember anything useful thanks to routine memory wipes. But she couldn’t help but ask herself who Maul was under the Sith exterior. Surely, he wasn’t just all Sith?

And she wondered, as the months dragged on for what felt like an eternity, if Maul was even still alive.

He had to be, she decided with a shudder. If he’d died on his mission, then his master would have already come to her to make her his new apprentice.

\---

When Maul stepped into the apartment for the first time in months, he finally allowed his guard to drop, at least to the levels it had been before he left.

For as long as he could remember, he’d been living with the constant fear that his master might dispose of him. He imagined that without this instinct engraved within him, he wouldn’t have lasted long in the prison. Being forced to fight in an arena day after day, gruesomely killing anyone and anything that opposed him, had taken its toll on him in ways he didn’t think possible. Diving deeper into the dark side than he’d ever been, Maul had relied on his pain to fuel his anger and hate, emotions which he’d channelled into the Force.

Showing even the slightest bit of weakness would have gotten him killed. There were times when he nearly succumbed to his opponents. But there were also times when he’d questioned his mission; times when the pain became almost unbearable and he contemplated giving up on life entirely. And in those instances, it wasn’t his anger or his hate that pushed him to keep going.

It was Eldra.

At first, he thought she would be a weakness and repressed her to the deepest corners of his mind. But when he’d been cornered by a particularly difficult opponent and had exhausted all other options, he’d allowed himself to think of her; had wondered if her burning radiance would survive against his master’s methods when he sought her as a new apprentice, to replace the one he had lost in the depths of this prison. And something within him had rebelled at the notion of her light being snuffed out, either by death or corruption to the darkness.

The next thing he knew, his opponent was lying dead at his feet.

Maul could sense her somewhere in the apartment, and found her presence comforting. It confused him, that she was a more powerful motivator than his anger and hatred, but he supposed that he was still using his passion, only a different kind. He felt… _something_ for her. What that something was, he didn’t know.

He could admit that he’d missed the way she fought, missed the challenge she presented every time they met in combat. He loved fighting her, and he was no longer afraid to admit it.

What shocked him was that he also missed _her_. Not the fight she could give him, but her presence. It was, for lack of a better word, _nice_ to have someone to talk to other than the droid, even if she mostly just spat insults and snark at him. But he couldn’t complain; he enjoyed her wit.

The whole thing was strange, and Maul wanted to hate himself for feeling this way towards her – emphasis on _wanted_.

Maul forced himself to move slowly as he removed his cloak. He would look a fool, if he sprinted to Eldra and insist she fight him this very instance. Added to that, the wounds he’d received during his escape hadn’t fully healed, and he wanted to fight her when he was at his best. He winced when a particularly nasty cut on his arm flared up in reaction to his movements. A quick look at it through his slashed sleeve revealed that while it was no longer bleeding, it probably needed attending to. It was in his best interests to heal himself and wait before he sparred with Eldra again.

But then patience wasn’t his strong point, as his master always told him.

“Good. You have returned.”

The young Sith instantly drew his lightsaber and spun around, ready to fight for his life.

He relaxed when he saw that it was only the droid. Putting his lightsaber away and ignoring the further inflammation of the cut on his arm, he said, “It would be unwise to approach me in such a manner, droid.”

It didn’t respond to his threat. The droid actually looked relieved to see him. “Please take your Jedi off my hands before I deactivate myself.”

_Your Jedi_. The words felt _right_ and pleasing, and Maul had a sudden urge to tell Eldra herself that she was _his_ Jedi. _MY Jedi_. It was disturbing, not least because it was already clear to her that she was basically his anyway. She didn’t need him to tell her.

He suppressed the urge, passed the droid without a word and went to seek out his Jedi. 


	6. Chapter Five: Forbidden Fruit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to say a big thanks to my beta, Artemisarrow! Without her, this story wouldn't be the way it is now.

And how is it I say these things

so easily to you

– “Enchantment Passing Through”, _Aida on Broadway_

\---

Maul sensed Eldra in the training room, and couldn’t help but quicken his pace. When he opened the door, he paused at the sight of her.

He re-noticed details about her which he’d forgotten during their months apart, like how her blue eyes were a shade darker than her skin tone. The most striking detail, though, was that she didn’t seem as radiant as he remembered. Or perhaps he always envisioned her being surrounded by the light side of the Force.

She was evading his training droids, deflecting the shots they fired at her. Leaping from platform to platform, she was able to stay ahead of them with almost ridiculous ease. Considering they had been programmed with the most difficult setting, this was an impressive feat. When the time was right to make her move, she managed to get behind them, one by one, and deactivate them in quick succession.

It was a magnificent sight, watching her in action. Maul was always too busy fighting her to really appreciate how well she fought; he hadn’t watched her like this since the Moon of Drazkel, when they’d teamed up to fight off their mutual enemies. He made a note to let her train with the droids more often, just so he could watch her.

When the last droid was deactivated, Maul wasted no time in activating one side of his lightsaber and leaping at her. He knew that with his injuries, it would be unwise to fight her, especially after witnessing such a display of skill. But then Maul so often proved that Darth Sidious had a right to be concerned about his impatience and arrogance, and this time was no exception. He yearned to fight her again; to fall back into their intricate dance that was not just challenging but also relaxing.

He wasn’t surprised when she turned and blocked his attack, smirking at him.

“You thought I wouldn’t notice you watching me?”

“No. You wouldn’t be a Jedi worthy of my time if you didn’t know I was there.”

As their lightsabers clashed with speeds unseen by the untrained eye, Maul noticed almost right away that she was enjoying the fight as much as he was, which was a welcome change compared to his battles in the prison’s arena. She wasn’t even tired from her session with the droids, and her resilience and energy pleased him.

But he soon realised that his wounds were hindering him, especially the cut on his arm. It was like they were screaming at him; telling him that he needed to stop and rest. But he stubbornly ignored them and pushed himself to keep going. His pain was his power. It fuelled his actions. He had returned after a victorious mission; after all he had endured, fighting a Jedi Padawan should be nothing in comparison.

Then Eldra’s lightsaber swung too close to his neck, close enough for him to feel his skin start to burn.

And suddenly he was back in the arena, facing a deadly opponent with sharp claws who kept attempting to slash open his neck. The enemy was long dead; Maul had impaled him in the gut with his horns. But in that moment, he was as alive as Maul himself was, and the young Sith cried out in shock before using the Force to push his opponent away. He prepared himself to charge and finish off his enemy in the same manner as before, but the flashback passed and he found himself standing in the training room again.

Eldra was leaning against the far wall, rubbing her head. Maul realised with a start that had he not come back to himself and charged…

He would have killed her. And the thought of her being gone frightened him.

With a roar of frustration, Maul disengaged his lightsaber and stormed over to the medical unit. He rested his open palms on the flat surface, leaning his weight against it and allowing himself a moment to refocus. Taking in deep breaths, he felt the Force move around him, and through his alliance with it he immersed himself in the familiarity of his apartment.

The presence of light in the form of Eldra Kaitis helped more than he wanted to admit.

After a minute or so, the stillness of the training room was disturbed by her footsteps as she cautiously walked towards him. He kept his back to her, knowing that Jedi honour would prevent her from striking him down while he was in such a vulnerable position. When she reached him, she didn’t speak; she instead picked up her canteen of water and drank from it. They leaned against the unit, side by side, neither saying a word.

Eldra spoke first, and Maul could feel her eyes on him as she said, “What happened?”

Maul clenched his fists and gritted his teeth. He didn’t want her pity. “It is none of your concern, Jedi.”

“It is when my sparring partner comes back battered and bruised, with PTSD flashbacks that’ll leave him out of commission for who knows how long.”

Hearing her call him _my partner_ sent a shiver of pleasure down his spine. It was the first time he’d ever felt such a sensation, and he didn’t know what to do with it.

And it didn’t _look_ like pity, what he could see in her eyes. She was looking at him like she _cared_ , and Maul couldn’t help but soften just a bit in response. “I can’t tell you the details of my mission. Just know that I was successful. But after that victory, I should have beaten you.”

“You’re hurt,” she gently pointed out. “Your body needs time to rest.”

He turned away from her, refusing to admit that she was right. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her open a cupboard and bring out a bacta patch. Realising what she intended to do, Maul instinctively curled in on himself and defensively pulled his injured arm closer. “I don’t need your help,” he hissed.

Eldra rolled her eyes. “Asking for and receiving help isn’t a weakness. Besides, you did the same for me after our first sparring match. At least let me return the favour.”

Maul still wasn’t sure what had compelled him to do that. He told himself it was to make sure she healed before they sparred again, but then she could have done it herself.

Stubborn and defiant, he wanted to refuse her help. It wasn’t like he needed it; he’d been patching himself up all his life, because his master certainly hadn’t helped him. The droid used to help him when he was younger, but only in instances when he’d been physically unable to help himself. And it had been years since he’d last needed such assistance.

But the way she was looking at him…

He sensed the light side of the Force dancing around her, calling out to him. In response, he could feel himself slowly uncurl, until finally he let go of his injured arm and held it out to her. Maul told himself that there was nothing wrong in letting her return the favour. She slowly rolled up his sleeve, being careful not to let the fabric touch his cut. Then, with gentle hands, she began to apply the bacta patch.

Maul didn’t flinch once. He was too focussed on what her touch was doing to him.

Whenever her skin brushed against his, it felt like fire. But it was not the same as the painful burns he received from lightsaber scorches, or the kind of burns that were left behind after his master hit him with Force lightning. It was the kind of heat one felt while sat in front of an open fire, after being out in the cold for too long.

And there was more to it than that. The warmth was calling out to something within him he couldn’t quite reach, at least not yet.

Too soon, it was over. The bacta patch was applied, and Eldra took a step back. There was a small smile on her face, and Maul decided that it was… _nice_. It made him want to return the gesture, but he refrained.

“Let yourself recover. We can start sparring again when you’re ready.” And with that, she walked out of the training room, leaving Maul alone with his thoughts.

The second she was gone, Maul could feel his anxiety building up. While he had allowed his guard to drop when he first entered the apartment, his reaction to the droid’s sudden appearance was enough to convince him that it would be a while before he felt secure again, even in his own home. And the fight didn’t just further prove this point, but also indicated that he would need to recover from his mental scars more than his physical ones before he could go back to sparring casually.

But Eldra… When she’d been close to him, all of his worries had been non-existent. The feel of her presence and the emotions that came with it were foreign to him, and while part of him wanted to stay away and latch onto the familiar feelings of anger and hate, a stronger part of him wanted to dive down deep into these new feelings.

It wasn’t against the Sith Code to explore these emotions, after all. They were supposed to drive him. His master had shown him the power of anger, of hate and of fear. Perhaps it was up to Maul himself to discover what kind of power could be harnessed from the emotions that remained.

Only, he didn’t want to rely on her. That would show weakness.

So Maul retreated to his quarters in order to rest, forcibly distancing himself from her. But when he laid down and closed his eyes, all he could see was the faces of his dead enemies from the prison, returning to haunt his nightmares. Sleep alluded him thanks to their screams echoing in his mind, and Maul tossed and turned before giving up and jumping out of his bed. He fidgeted with his lightsaber as he paced his room, debating on what to do.

Eldra said he needed to rest, but how could he when even now he was subconsciously expecting some kind of brute to break into his room and try to kill him? He could only see one option that would solve his problem, and the part of him that so desperately wanted to be like Sidious rebelled at the very thought of it.

It was a short rebellion.

Maul set down his lightsaber and left his quarters. He took a moment to sense where she was, before following her presence into the main apartment area. She was sat down on the sofa, reading something on the datapad with her brows knotted together, and Maul decided that he liked the expression. He wasn’t sure why, and thought it best not to think about it too hard.

The young Sith saw the moment when she sensed him; her body went still, and her eyes stopped moving across the screen. She stayed that way, as if she was confirming to herself that he was really standing there, before she finally turned to meet his gaze. Her eyes were filled with both confusion and suspicion, and while Maul understood the latter, he didn’t like the fact that she was looking at him in that way.

“Did you want something?” she asked. “Or have you finally decided to interrogate me about the Jedi Order?”

“No.” Maul shook his head. “All I need to know about the Jedi is that they are my enemies, and I must destroy them to fulfil my destiny.”

“Hate to break this to you, but considering your first fight against a Jedi ended in me burying you under a lot of rocks, you may want to rethink what your destiny might be.” Her smile told him that she meant her words in good humour, and he found himself smiling back.

Before he realised what he was doing, and repressed it back down.

He took a seat at the other end of the sofa, mindful enough to know to keep his distance. For a moment, he considered telling her that he couldn’t sleep; considered telling her about all of the unspeakable horrors he’d faced while locked up, and how shaken he truly was after all he had endured. He wanted to tell her with a desperation that he didn’t understand that the whole experience had forced him to question his purpose as a disciple of the Sith, because none of what he’d seen should have affected him at all, but it _had_ and he didn’t understand what that meant…

Instead, he kept quiet and let her presence relax him.

Eldra kept glancing sideways at him, like she was expecting him to do or say something. Maul quickly deduced that her actions probably had something to do with what had happened between them before he’d left on his mission. She was expecting him to bring it up, or react in a certain way. But he didn’t see the need to. To talk about what they’d already both felt from each other would be pointless.

Eventually, Eldra stopped with the glances. After putting the datapad down onto the table, she brought a hand up to her head as if to brush something aside, but paused when her hand met nothing but air. Her hand slowly lowered, and Maul could see the feeling of loss in her eyes. She’d done this action many times before; Maul had managed to figure out after the second time what she was doing.

“You should stop doing that. Your braid is long gone.”

She sighed. “I know. Xev Xrexus took it when she captured me. Since she didn’t give it to the sleemo who bought me, she probably destroyed it. Surprised she didn’t do it with me watching. She took some kind of twisted pleasure in telling me every day that I’d never be a Jedi again.”

“Hardly a shock that she failed. You will _always_ be a Jedi.”

He could see her surprise at his words, followed by confusion as to how she could respond to them. She chose instead to stay silent.

At least, at first. “I was angry. Angry at the Force for taking my master from me. Angry at that bugslut for having the gall to sell me off to the highest bidder. Angry at you and your master for keeping me here against my will – I’m still mad about that, but it’s mostly aimed at your master. And… I was angry at myself, for, well, _being_ angry.”

“There is no shame in anger,” said Maul. “The power you can forge with your anger is a weapon all on its own.”

“But it’s not the Jedi way.”

Maul almost snarled, but fought the urge. “The Jedi’s lack of emotion blinds them to the real power of the Force. Your emotions are part of you, and to deny them is to deny your full potential. What kind of life is that, feeling _nothing_?”

“We _have_ emotions,” she argued. “We just don’t let them control us.”

“From my point of view, it is the same thing.”

She was silent again, though this time it only lasted a few moments before she turned on him. “Like the Sith’s way of life is any better, being completely driven by emotions. Actually, not even that; you’re driven by _negative_ emotions. Sure, being stoic your whole life probably isn’t healthy for anyone, but your extreme isn’t exactly the way to live, either.”

Maul ignored her, just like he ignored how the anger and hate and emptiness ate away at his soul bit by bit with every passing day. He would never give up the dark side. But he wouldn’t mind having a spark of light close at hand, whenever he needed to drive the emptiness away.

\---

They never did talk about what happened in Maul’s quarters, which Eldra decided was for the best.

The next several months passed by in a blur of routine. Unlike the months when Maul was away on his mission, Eldra’s aching loneliness had subsided somewhat, but it didn’t go away. It probably never would, given that her only companions were a Sith Lord and a droid, and she was still separated from those she cared for.

Eldra’s birthday came and went. She didn’t mention it to Maul, because she was certain without a shadow of a doubt that Sith didn’t celebrate them. Maul certainly didn’t celebrate his.

She grew used to her environment with a passive acceptance that sat uncomfortably with her, but couldn’t be helped if she was going to survive. It was ironic that she was finally learning what her master had tried to teach her over and over, the lesson of patience, when said master was long gone. It helped that her circumstances were bearable; she was being fed, lived in a room instead of a cell, and wasn’t being tortured in any way. But she never lost sight of the fact that she was being held against her will.

Though sometimes it didn’t feel like a prison. Especially when Maul started to seek her out just to talk.

At first, she thought it was because they weren’t sparring, since she’d persuaded him to take a break from it in order to recover. It didn’t surprise her that someone like Maul got bored easily, so it made sense for him to find other means of entertaining himself when he couldn’t fight – even if that meant holding a conversation with his worst enemy.

(But Eldra was starting to suspect that the young Sith didn’t hate her, at least not anymore. She also suspected that the droid was beginning to like her as well, despite his vocal complaints and insistence that he would rather deactivate himself than spend an afternoon with her.)

Only, when they started sparring again, Maul continued to find her at random points in the day and start conversations with her. She didn’t know whether or not to be suspicious, but that was the most baffling part: he seemed to have no ulterior motive for talking to her. It was getting easier by the day to read him; to pick up on the way he carried himself, his facial cues and the different emotions in his eyes. And from what she could read, he seemed to come and talk to her simply because he wanted to.

She was beginning to learn that Sith were more complicated than ‘Dark Side Bad: Cut in Half with Lightsaber’.

With Maul’s return to sparring, Eldra could openly admit that she enjoyed their fights, mostly thanks to her boredom when he’d been gone. After accepting that fact, their fights more often than not ended in a stalemate, which suited Eldra just fine. She didn’t know what would happen if she was the one winning all the time, but if Maul started winning all of their fights, she knew his master would no longer see a use for her and order Maul to kill her.

(The training also allowed Eldra to get better at the six Forms of combat she had learnt in the Temple. She favoured Forms II and IV, Makashi and Ataru, but it was nice to practise the rest. Maul was a master at Forms VI and VII, Niman and Juyo. He offered to train her in Juyo, but she declined.)

Sometimes, Maul would tell her to fight the training droids so he could watch her. Other times, she would watch Maul train on his own with the droids. Watching him from an outside perspective allowed her to see just how ferocious he fought. He reminded her of a Vornskr, and she thought to herself it was no wonder he was a master of Form VII, often referred to as The Way of the Vornskr.

It was on one such day about a year since her captivity had begun (but she was ignoring _that_ reminder as best she could) that she was watching Maul do battle against the training droids. She too had also fought him that day, a fight that had ended in a stalemate. When the droids were deactivated, Maul sat down next to her on the floor of the training room, and she handed him a canteen of water.

“Do you think I could ask Venny to paint a picture of Xev Xrexus on one of the droids?” she asked him. “Since I can’t actually kill her for real, I’ll settle for the next best thing.”

“Xev Xrexus is dead.”

“She is?” Eldra hadn’t heard anything to the contrary, but then holojournalists never reported on what was going on in the criminal underworld for obvious reasons. The majority of people who lived on the upper levels of Coruscant liked to pretend that crime was non-existent and everything was perfect inside their little bubble. Back when Adi Gallia had taken down the Krayn slave ring, there hadn’t been a single bit of news coverage about it.

(But the holojournalists _did_ report on a number of businesses that suddenly went bust afterwards. When Eldra had read the old holojournals during her time as a Padawan, she’d been both shocked and disgusted that so-called “legitimate” companies had managed to profit off of slave labour in the heart of the Republic, where slavery was supposed to be illegal. She’d done a lot of growing up since then, and wasn’t even surprised by the amount of illegal activity that was covered up by the politicians.)

“She suspected what I was, so I had to kill her,” Maul continued. “It was after my master and I brought you onto his ship.”

Eldra refused to flinch at the mention of her capture. “Jedi aren’t supposed to take a life unless they have no other choice; to save their own life or the lives of others. But you won’t find me mourning over that bugslut.”

She realised that she didn’t even care that Maul most likely killed her when the woman was unarmed. She told herself that a woman like Xev Xrexus was better off dead so she couldn’t hurt anymore beings in the galaxy. With the amount of profit she’d made from the auction, it wouldn’t have surprised Eldra if she’d tried in the future to kidnap another Jedi Padawan (or even a Jedi Knight) to get an even higher payday.

The thought of any of her friends in her position made Eldra sick to her stomach.

“What about the people who came to the auction?” she asked. “Did you kill them, too?”

“No. They had all given up the hunt and left by the time I arrived,” said Maul. “The ones who were on the station never saw me in action, so there was no point in going after them. And the ones on the ground who _did_ see me were killed by you and myself.”

For a millisecond, she was regretful that Maul hadn’t killed the rest of the buyers. Then she realised how dark her thoughts sounded, along with her thoughts about the death of Xev Xrexus. Her feelings about her previous captor warred with one another; gladness that she was dead and couldn’t hurt anyone else, against regret that a life had been snuffed out.

Perhaps this was why the Jedi suppressed their emotions. Perhaps it was better to feel nothing, so there was no conflict.

She released her thoughts and feelings on the matter into the Force, and refused to dwell on the subject any longer. Her time as the Sith’s captive was starting to affect her in ways she didn’t like. It was one thing to sympathise with and understand a Sith, but it was another thing entirely to start thinking like one.

In her mind, Eldra repeated her mantra of indifference: she could be in worse situations, but she was still a slave. She hadn’t suffered the fate that awaited most Twi’lek slave girls, but her freedom had still been taken from her.

It kept her in a state of calm; kept her from falling into the dark while also stopping her from throwing her life away by rebelling unnecessarily. Her time would come to escape. For now, she would stay in her gilded cage, refusing to give up her strength and spirit.

Eldra climbed to her feet and reached out her hand. Her lightsaber crossed the room, igniting in mid-air. She caught it and turned to Maul, falling naturally into a battle stance. She was becoming more and more of a fighter with each passing day, and growing further and further from the peacekeeper she’d been trained to become.

She wondered what kind of Jedi she would be if she ever escaped.

“I want to have another shot at destroying you today, if that’s alright.”

Maul grinned at her and leapt to his feet, his whole body shaking with excitement. He called his lightsaber to his hand and turned it on, before reaching out with the Force and dimming the lights. It gave them both more of a challenge.

“You can certainly try, Eldra Kaitis.”


	7. Chapter Six: Heat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter takes place directly after the last one. Just a reminder that it's been a year since Eldra's capture, so she and Maul are now 18.

Too many choices tear us apart,

I don’t want to live like that

– “Elaborate Lives”, _Aida on Broadway_

\---

Maul decided that he would never get tired of fighting Eldra.

She never used the same tactics twice. She adapted; modified her technique whenever they fought. When he first started training against her to better his skills, he never considered that she would do the same. But it worked in his favour, for it meant that he would always have a worthy opponent to fight.

Until Sidious deemed her no longer useful. The thought of being ordered to kill her filled him with an unfamiliar dread. He told himself it was because killing her would be such a waste of a worthy sparring partner. The possibility of there being another reason was something he didn’t want to consider.

He’d been ignoring so many things since Eldra had come into his life. It was true what he’d told her, that killing Xev Xrexus had been about keeping the Sith a secret. In the moment he’d struck her down, that had been the only reason. But since then, he liked to relive her death.

_“This is vengeance, then? For the girl? For the Padawan?”_

And when he did, he bathed in the feeling of satisfaction from killing the woman who had caused Eldra so much pain. Though like with everything else, he ignored how in a way, he’d avenged a Jedi.

_“You won’t find me mourning over that bugslut.”_

And he ignored how her words gave him an even greater satisfaction.

Their lightsabers flared as they clashed together, creating a purple glow in the dimly lit training room. Maul advanced on Eldra and she flipped backwards twice to avoid him, sparks lighting up the room as her lightsaber scorched the floor. He had to admire how controlled her jumps and flips were, for her lekku not to get in her way. 

His lightsaber brushed too closely to her arm, but she didn’t flinch. The sleeve of her robe was singed slightly, and he briefly wondered how many items of clothing they’d gone through due to lightsabers cutting too close. Eldra’s original Jedi robes had long since been discarded, replaced with clothes that looked similar to them.

Maul advanced on her again, quicker this time so she couldn’t retreat. He used only one side of his lightsaber to strike her own, three times in quick succession. On the third strike their lightsabers locked, and he pushed down on her in a show of strength. With her bending backwards under his weight at an awkward angle, he thought he had her.

But then she smirked, allowed herself to drop to the floor, and used the momentum of the sudden movement to kick him over her head.

He landed on his back hard, which stunned him momentarily. But it was long enough for Eldra to jump to her feet, kick the lightsaber out of his hands and point her own at his neck. She was sweating and panting, but in her eyes was unbridled glee at besting him.

Seeing her standing above him, victorious and strong… It awakened something within him, something he couldn’t explain or comprehend.

“Do you yield?” she said.

In response, he raised his hands. He waited for her to switch off her lightsaber before he made his move.

A swift kick to her hand relieved her of her weapon, and another sent her to the floor beside him. Before she could protest, he leapt on top of her, grabbed her wrists and pinned them to the floor either side of her head. He sat on her in a way that prevented her from kicking him off again, and he remained unmoving as she bucked beneath him. She tried to spit in his face, but he moved his head to avoid the shot.

“What are you doing?!” she demanded.

In all honesty, Maul didn’t know. Not until he dove in and pressed his lips to hers.

While he had never experienced it due to his utter devotion to the Sith and his master, Maul was aware of the pleasures of the flesh. On his travels, he had witnessed other beings in the galaxy performing such acts, from small touches and kisses to other things they probably shouldn’t have been doing in public. But such acts never interested him.

Until Eldra.

Everything he’d ignored regarding what he felt about her had led him to this moment. He could feel the light side of the Force deep within her, its tendrils twisting around him and pulling him in, and he didn’t care. All he knew was that he wanted Eldra with an intense desire he’d never felt before.

Eldra went still beneath him when their lips first touched, most likely from shock. But when that wore off and she realised what was happening, she started to buck again. When that failed to move him, she bit down hard on his lip. That only made him want her _more_. But he did pull back, giving her the chance to headbutt him, _hard_.

His head snapped backwards, and his grip on her wrists loosened. Eldra yanked her arms back before quickly punching Maul in the face, then took advantage of his unbalanced body and threw him off of her. She then leapt to her feet before he could try and grab her again.

Eldra called her lightsaber back to her hand, never taking her eyes off him. Maul stared up at her, not at all surprised by her reaction, but at the same time he felt… hurt. He hated it. Hated that this Jedi could cause him such pain.

But through the Force, he could sense no disgust coming from her. Just shock… and fear. It hovered around her with an unnatural familiarity, and looking into her wide, frightened eyes, Maul found himself despairing.

Getting a Jedi to fear him should have made him ecstatic. Instead, it actually hurt worse than her rejection. It startled him to realise that he didn’t want Eldra to be afraid of him, not anymore. How the mighty had fallen. (Only that didn’t bother him as much as it should have.)

After staring at him for a long moment, Eldra turned on her heel and fled the room.

And once again, Maul had to fight down the urge to scream and beg for her to stay.

\---

Eldra couldn’t even begin to comprehend what had happened in the training room.

Maul had kissed her. _Kissed_ her.

_He’s a Sith, for Force’s sake! Why would he kiss his mortal enemy?!_

It would be so easy to explain it away as a ploy to trick her, or a tactic to throw her off-balance so he could finally kill her. The fact that she was still alive disproved the latter theory. As for the former… She’d become scarily attuned to his moods and his way of thinking during her captivity. She would’ve been able to tell if it had been a trick.

His eyes tended to give him away. In the split second before he’d kissed her, she saw the desire in them; saw how much he wanted her. And then, when she’d thrown him off, he actually looked _hurt_.

But what shocked her the most was that kissing him _hadn’t_ made her skin crawl.

That was probably due to the fragile bond that existed between them, something Eldra was reluctant to admit was there. And in truth, she could make a whole list of people who she’d want to kiss less. It was the realisation that she was kissing a Sith Lord – one who was willingly partaking in holding her captive – that made her reject him.

And there was also the fear of how far it could’ve gone, without her consent.

She ignored _that_ bantha in the room and instead focussed on what could have possibly motivated him to glue himself to her face. It was after she’d defeated him, so it could’ve been some kind of weird domination thing. But she’d defeated him before, many times, and he’d never done it then.

Eldra turned to look in the mirror at the far end of her bedroom and stared at her reflection. Her gaze narrowed in on the sleeve that had been singed by Maul’s lightsaber; the close encounter had left behind a hole, big enough for skin to be clearly visible through it. Not that it mattered. A little extra skin exposure wouldn’t hurt; all of the clothes Venny had bought for her were modest like her Jedi robes. She was lucky she wasn’t being forced to wear the usually attire of Twi’lek slave girls.

The thought hit her and wouldn’t go away. Maybe that was the reason for Maul’s actions. He’d finally realised he had a beautiful Twi’lek girl as his slave, and wanted to take advantage of that.

She didn’t want to feel the anger that suddenly coursed through her, but she felt like this time, it was justified. _Men are all the same, even Sith Lords_.

Eldra shook her head. No, that wasn’t true; that was just the anger talking. Not all men were like that. The Jedi weren’t the type obviously, and she’d met plenty of men outside of the Temple who had treated her like a person instead of a sexual object.

But she’d lost count of how many times men had looked her up and down with thinly concealed lust in their eyes. Lost count of how many times she and her master had entered a seedy bar for information and had men hit on her – or worse, touch her without her permission. Though that came with the benefit of those sleemos regretting it pretty quickly afterwards when she’d tossed them across the room.

_“Padawan, a mind trick exists for a reason.”_

_“So they can just go and try it on another girl who isn’t a Jedi? This way they’ll never do it again.”_

_“We’re never going to enter a bar without having to fight our way out of it, are we?”_

_“Probably not.”_

Eldra squeezed her eyes shut but refused to cry. What was once calming – remembering her time with her master – instead felt like someone was squeezing her heart with an iron grip. This time, Leora Ori wasn’t beside her. This time, Eldra was alone.

The familiar fear crept up on her.

It reminded her of Aston Luske, a Force-sensitive human she and Leora had encountered two years previously. He’d acted like he was entitled to have her for her beauty, and she’d been terrified that he would overpower her and take her against her will. It had definitely been the most violent instance of that kind of behaviour.

When she’d been a captive of Xev Xrexus, she’d been worried that one of the guards would enter her cell and force himself on her. Xrexus had ordered that she remained unharmed, but she doubted the woman would’ve stopped her men from doing other sorts of things to her. And being cut off from the Force, there wasn’t much Eldra would have been able to do to stop them.

She thanked the Force it hadn’t happened.

The mantra of indifference had kept her going for over a year; the knowledge that things were bad but at least she hadn’t suffered a worse fate. She should have known it wouldn’t last, that it was too good to be true. Her lightsaber still sat in her hand, and she found herself looking down at it. She wondered if she finally had the strength to turn it on herself…

Eldra looked up towards the door. She could sense Maul approaching.

He opened it without knocking, but remained in the doorway. Eldra couldn’t describe what she could see in his eyes; he almost looked _lost_ , but then she couldn’t imagine a Sith Lord looking weak in any way.

She clenched her empty fist, kept her lightsaber ready and got to her feet, never taking her eyes off of him. “If you’re coming to ask me to change into one of those stupid slave bikinis, I’m not interested in playing out your perverted fantasies. So go shove it.”

Maul actually looked confused. “Why would I ask you to wear that? They’re impractical for fighting.”

The urge to scream at him almost got the better of her, but her master’s voice in her mind stopped her before she could.

_Careful, Padawan. Do not start a conflict when it is not needed_.

Eldra composed herself. There was nothing to prove _that_ was what he wanted from her. All she had was a hunch – a mighty strong hunch, but a hunch nonetheless. She needed him to say it, to admit it to her, before she could take drastic action. For all she knew, he could’ve just kissed her to annoy her and had no intention of doing it again.

So she sighed, and asked in an even voice, “Why did you kiss me?”

Maul was silent. There was a slight frown on his face, like he was trying to figure out how to answer her. Eldra realised with a start that he didn’t seem to _know_ why he’d kissed her, and was trying to figure it out himself. It didn’t surprise her that a Sith wouldn’t know the first thing about relationships.

She decided to help him out and added, “Is it because of how I look?”

“No.” His answer to that was instant. “Why would I kiss you because of how you look?”

_That_ surprised her. And from how he sounded, he wasn’t trying to flatter her with what she wanted to hear; he sounded genuinely confused at the notion that he would act on being physically attracted to her beauty. But while it was nice to know that he didn’t think of her as a sexual object, that still didn’t answer her question. “Then why?”

His head tilted as he considered her. “You were standing above me, so… strong. So full of spirit; one that cannot be broken. And you defeated me through cunning.” It sounded like her was _purring_ as he spoke. “I did not know what I wanted to do to you until I did it. I cannot explain what this is. This… burning desire.”

Eldra could only stare at him in shock.

Part of her warned herself not to explain it to him; as a Sith, he would most likely kill her in order to stop those feelings from continuing. Or his master would kill her so she could no longer distract his apprentice. Another part of her couldn’t process the idea that a Sith Lord could even _feel_ what he’d described to her.

What was more, he didn’t even feel that way about her because of how she looked. It was because of _who_ she was. It was almost… sweet.

_And I can’t believe I just thought of a Sith Lord as ‘sweet’. He’s not sweet. He’s confused by feelings his master no doubt tried to torture out of him, and has no idea how to process them_.

Eventually, she found her voice. “Way too many men have wanted me because they say I’m pretty to look at. At least you’re not one of them.”

“Because this is the face of someone who cares about physical attractiveness.”

She couldn’t stop the sudden burst of laughter that exploded out of her, thought she quickly reined it back in when she saw Maul react in surprise towards her outburst. “Sorry.”

Maul crossed his arms, considering her for a moment. “You feel strongly about this matter. It makes you feel… angry. And afraid.” If Eldra didn’t know any better, she would say that he looked concerned.

But she wasn’t surprised that Maul was able to read her so well. Like she to his, he’d become attuned to her moods. “In case you haven’t noticed, Twi’lek women are popular among the slave cartels for reasons that should be obvious. I used to think that being a Jedi would protect me from a fate like that, but getting captured by Xev Xrexus pretty much destroyed that notion. And I was already terrified of what other Force-wielders could do to me.”

“What other…?” She was starting to think that Maul really _was_ concerned, because there was no other explanation for the look in his eyes as he watched her. “You thought that I would…?”

“No.” His words surprised her. He was a Sith; she didn’t think that sort of thing would matter to him. Unless he was insulted by the assumption that he would desire her for reasons he considered to be beneath him, like physical attractiveness. “I never got that vibe from you. And you made it pretty clear to me right from the start that you wanted to fight me. I was referring to someone I met before you.”

“The Sith are always two. A master and an apprentice. You cannot have met another.”

Eldra shook her head. “He wasn’t a Sith. Wasn’t a Jedi, either. His name was Aston Luske, and he grew up in a small village on some back-water planet I can’t remember the name of. Far enough from the Republic to slip under the Jedi’s radar. He taught himself how to use the Force, and he became the town hero. To say that it went to his head would be a massive understatement. He got whatever he wanted… until I came along and ruined his day.”

“He desired you, and you rejected him.”

She nodded. “He felt entitled to have me because I was the most beautiful being he’d ever seen. He claimed that he deserved the best. But I turned him down – not even because of the Jedi Code, but because he was an egotistical mess – and he didn’t know how to deal with that. I wasn’t surprised that he fell to the dark side faster than lightspeed.”

Maul frowned. “There’s more to it than that.”

“Yeah.” She sighed. “My master and I were on a mission, and when this went down, we hadn’t completed it. So while we were trying to track down an escaped convict, Aston was making the mission ten times harder by constantly interfering. And one night… he found where I was sleeping, broke in, and tried to force himself on me. I immediately beat his arse because a trained Jedi he is not, and I kept telling everyone afterwards I was fine, but… It shook me.”

The Sith didn’t judge her, didn’t call her weak. He just watched her. “How many times did he attempt it?”

“Why do you want to know?”

“So I can determine how painfully Aston Luske needs to die.”

The fact that he wanted to brutally murder someone didn’t surprise her. The fact that he seemed to want to do it in order to avenge her _did_. “I sorta beat you to the punch. Maybe. I’m not sure. Our last fight ended with me kind of accidentally pushing him into one of the tallest waterfalls in the galaxy. His chances of survival were slim, but then I’ve heard of people surviving worse, especially Force-wielders.”

“A pity.”

“And it’s a bit hypocritical, you getting angry over that. _You_ forced a kiss on me, remember?”

He didn’t respond to her, at least not verbally. He raised an eyebrow in her direction with a look that screamed ‘ _And?_ ’ Which she should have expected, seeing as his emotional comprehension was severely lacking.

_Survive. Do what you must to survive_. Eldra sighed, reminding herself of her earlier realisation that there were worse people that could’ve kissed her. Maul was, strangely enough, a better option than Aston. And if she was going to roll with what was happening, then she at least wanted to have some form of control over it. She refused to be a victim.

So, she continued and asked, “Maybe ask me first next time, OK?”

She got a small victory out of the surprise that flashed across Maul’s face. He quickly composed himself and said, “I thought the Jedi Code forbade attachments? That such acts were considered to be a path to the dark side?”

And to that, she shot back with, “I thought the Sith considered such acts a weakness?”

Eldra was rewarded once again with the same look of surprise, though instead of composing himself, Maul instead grinned. “I suppose it doesn’t matter if we’re _both_ breaking the rules, does it?”

Maybe she was crazy. Maybe she really was falling to the dark side.

But maybe this was the way forward. In a way, her original plan had sort of worked, and she wasn’t about to back out now.


	8. Chapter Seven: Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minor warning for a heated make-out session, but nothing that warrants a higher rating.

I’m scared and I’m not sure that you are safe,

but your eyes seem to say that you are good

– “Lion”, _Rebecca St. James_

\---

Eldra’s eyes opened to the familiar sound of waterfalls, and she was nearly blinded by the sunlight shining down through the glass ceiling.

She was lying on a soft patch of earth, and the young Jedi breathed deeply while she ran her fingers through the blades of grass. The Room of a Thousand Fountains could always be relied on to calm her down after a stressful mission. She closed her eyes again and let the peaceful atmosphere settle around her.

A thought nagged her at the back of her mind, telling her that this wasn’t real. She ignored the feeling. She’d lived in the Temple her whole life; why wouldn’t this be real?

“Obi-Wan, get back here!”

“Siri, you started it!”

The voices of her friends forced Eldra to open her eyes again, and she sat upright to look for them. They were running across the grass, Obi-Wan out in front with Siri in hot pursuit, and every Jedi Knight or Master they passed just rolled their eyes and shook their heads at the antics of the two Padawans. Eldra herself shook her head with a smile as she climbed to her feet.

Obi-Wan reached her first and quickly dived behind her. “Eldra, protect me!”

“I don’t think even Master Yoda could protect you from Siri,” Eldra laughed.

“You can bet the Force on that,” said Siri, when she reached them. “Eldra, let me at him! He cancelled my holovid queue!”

“Only because you dunked my toothbrush in the toilet!”

“And I only did _that_ because you and Reeft ate all of my Wookie Cookies!”

“I don’t see you dunking _Reeft’s_ toothbrush!”

“I didn’t _need_ to. All I had to do was glare at him.”

Eldra frowned. “Is that why he’s been hiding behind Bant and Garen all this week whenever you’re around?”

Siri nodded. “Yep. Are you going to step aside?”

The Twi’lek turned to Obi-Wan and shrugged. “Sorry, Obi. You’ve got two offences and she’s only got one. Fair is fair.”

Before Eldra could make way for Siri, Obi-Wan Force jumped backwards and landed on the small wall that surrounded one of the fountains. “Oh no, what a shame. It seems I have the high ground.”

Eldra and Siri exchanged glances and smirked. They then raised their hands together and Force pushed Obi-Wan backwards. He didn’t have time to block their attack, and fell face-first into the water. Giggling, Siri and Eldra raced over to the fountain and quickly dunked their friend back under again when he came up for air.

“Padawans! Or should I be calling you Younglings?”

They didn’t need to turn to know who it was.

“Kriff! It’s Master Windu!” Siri grabbed Eldra’s hand and dragged her away. “Come on!”

The two girls raced through the Temple hallways. Eldra let herself laugh at the top of her lungs, and somehow it felt as though it was her first real laugh in a long time. She couldn’t understand why; she’d been laughing with her friends the previous day.

They turned a corner and suddenly skidded to a halt at the sight of the three older Jedi standing before them, in deep discussion. Two of which were their masters.

Leora Ori, Adi Gallia and Qui-Gon Jinn all turned their heads to acknowledge the two Padawans. Each of their eyebrows rose while maintaining hard to read expressions.

“Um…” Siri was the first to compose herself, and quickly shifted into a casual stance which Eldra quickly imitated. “Greetings, Masters. Good day for a jog, isn’t it?”

“What have you done now, Siri?” Master Gallia asked, getting straight to the point.

Siri held her hand over her heart. “It hurts, Master. Truly it does. We’ve done nothing. Isn’t that right, Eldra?”

The Twi’lek nodded. “Yep. Nothing at all.”

Her own master’s eyebrows shot higher. “Really?”

“So then tell me, girls,” said Qui-Gon, hands on his hips, “why my Padawan is soaking wet from head to toe?”

Both Padawans turned around to see an annoyed Obi-Wan stalking towards them, leaving a wet trail in his wake. They both bit down on their lips to stop themselves from laughing at him.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been this wet in my life,” he told them both, once he was stood before them. “Nothing short of a desert could dry me off.”

Eldra blinked, and suddenly they were no longer standing in the Jedi Temple. The roof and the walls and the pillars were gone, and the floor had become sand. They were all standing in the middle of a giant, empty desert with twin suns blazing overhead.

Siri was no longer beside her. Eldra turned around and saw her standing with Obi-Wan, his robes as dry as the sand that surrounded them. The pair were embracing, but in a way Eldra had never seen before: like lovers. What was more, they looked older than they had been only moments ago; Obi-Wan had grown a beard, and Siri seemed more confident in her own beauty.

The most startling thing about the sight, though, was the small girl running circles around them. She had Siri’s blonde hair and Obi-Wan’s blue eyes; there was no doubting who her parents were. Said parents were watching her with proud smiles.

Eldra turned back to the three older Jedi, but stared in horror at the sight of her master lying before her in a pool of blood. The Padawan barely noticed the change of scenery; the wreckage of a ship scattered around them with smoke filling the air. The familiarity of the picture told Eldra that it had happened before, but her memories were clouded.

She looked up in time to see a red blade pierce into Qui-Gon’s gut. Her scream lodged in her throat, and she felt all the air leave her lungs. The Jedi Master fell into a heap next to a reactor vent that had suddenly appeared, his blue eyes lifeless, and Eldra wanted to run to him but couldn’t. Something was holding her feet in place.

Adi Gallia had her lightsaber out and was deflecting blaster bolts from an unknown source. She was standing in the dimly lit hallway of a ship, sweat dripping down her forehead, her movements hindered by exhaustion. It was no surprise when a blaster bolt hit her from behind, knocking her to the floor. Eldra still couldn’t move.

Terrifying laughter suddenly filled the air, making her sick to her stomach. The ship hallway went dark, and from out of the shadows a hooded figure appeared. His fingers sparked with blue lightning, which he wasted no time in directing at her. Eldra fell backwards and screwed her eyes shut, waiting for the pain.

It never came. She opened her eyes again to find that someone had jumped in front of her and taken the hit. He screamed and convulsed as electricity shot through him, forcing him to his knees. Turning his back on the hooded figure and bending over, he kept himself in front of Eldra despite the pain he was experiencing. Then Eldra noticed that he was also shielding something else. There was a small bundle on the ground before him – a small bundle that was moving.

The lightning stopped, and the figure took in several deep breaths in order to recover before looking up at her. It was Maul.

His yellow eyes weren’t as vivid, and the emotions in his eyes were ones she’d never seen before, at least on him. Her mind was so muddled that she couldn’t name them, but the one that she _could_ she didn’t want to acknowledge, because it seemed impossible that someone like him could feel anything like the raw and overwhelming love that was surrounding them both.

With desperation in his every movements, Maul pushed the bundle towards her. And in between breaths, he said, “I… promised.”

The bundle began to squirm.

Eldra realised with a start that the bundle was a baby, but before she could reach out and hold the child, the darkness vanished and was replaced with sunlight. The hooded figure and the baby vanished, and at first so did Maul. But when she shot to her feet and looked around her, Eldra found him standing on her other side.

Their surroundings were nothing short of paradise. Lush plant life, beautiful blue skies, a clean lake stretched out before them… Eldra looked down at her bare feet and dug her toes into the warm sand. Unlike the sand in the desert, which was rough and hard, this sand was soft and comfortable.

A pair of arms encircled her, and Eldra let her head rest on Maul’s chest, which he reacted to with a purr. There was no fear; instead, she felt safe.

She didn’t know how long they stood like that, but eventually Maul placed a finger under her chin and tilted her head up to face him. His eyes looked almost _brown_ with tints of yellow still visible, and Eldra could no longer deny the feeling she saw in them.

He leaned forwards and pressed his lips to hers. It was soft and wonderful, and Eldra kissed him back enthusiastically, and continued to do so even when they both fell onto the sand. Eldra could feel herself growing hotter, and she hurriedly started removing her clothes while Maul removed his, and they kept kissing and touching each other and something was building and growing and her lower regions felt like they were on fire…

Eldra sat upright with a gasp.

The cloudiness of her dreams faded, and she remembered where she was. In her room, in Maul’s apartment. The captive of the Sith.

And she’d just had a dream about doing… _that_ with one of them.

Her inner thighs were wet, she realised. She leapt out of bed and hurried into the refresher to clean herself up. As she did, she tried to contemplate what she’d seen in her dreams. Master Ori taught her that while some dreams were visions of things to come, other dreams were just, well, _dreams_. And those were the result of her mind unwinding as she slept. Everyone had them.

It was more than likely that the bits with Maul were just dreams; a result of what she’d been doing with him over the past couple of weeks. Maul had been quick to take advantage of the new development between them, kissing her whenever he got the chance, so long as he asked her first and she said ‘yes’. Which she did, for the most part.

After cleaning her thighs, Eldra placed her hands either side of the sink and leaned against it, head down. She’d been trying to go with the flow and pretend that the kissing didn’t affect her, but it did. And not even in the right way. It should repulse her, that a Sith was kissing her, only it was doing the opposite. The warmth that was growing within her steadily, day by day, was coming close to consuming her. She’d hoped things wouldn’t get that far, but clearly her dreams had other ideas.

Kissing was one thing. Doing _that_ was another thing entirely.

And what if the dreams were more than that? What if they really _were_ visions?

Recalling the way Maul had looked at her… Eldra wondered if that would be so bad. Being a Jedi meant that romantic relationships were forbidden, but time away from the Order had revealed a desire hidden deep within her; a desire to feel wanted by someone, to be loved. Especially by someone who wanted her because of who she was rather than because of what she looked like. And what she’d seen in his eyes…

No matter what the dream meant – whether it was a vision or not – she knew that there had to be some good in him. The Force wouldn’t show her this if it wasn’t true.

But part of her still rebelled at the whole situation. Sure, maybe he had it in him to care for someone else, and maybe she could be that someone else. But he was still a Sith Lord; still an enemy of the Jedi. He still wanted to kill everyone she held dear, and he was still holding her against her will. Well, his master was, but Maul was going along with it. And sympathising with him didn’t mean she excused his actions.

It brought her back to the other parts of her dream; the parts she was almost certain were visions of things to come. Her master’s death had already occurred, but the other two… The red blade that pierced Qui-Gon Jinn worried her the most, because there was no doubt that one of the Sith Lords holding her captive would be responsible. She was less certain of what could be the cause of Adi Gallia’s death. A mission gone wrong?

At least she could be sure that Obi-Wan and Siri were fine. Though she didn’t know what to think about what she’d seen. The two of them together, romantically? With a child? The pair tormented each other; would they last long enough to settle down and have children before they annoyed each other to death?

Eldra shook her head. That wasn’t her most pressing issue. She closed her eyes and saw Qui-Gon’s death again, and wondered if there was any way she could stop it.

All she could do was push forwards with her plan. If there truly was some good in Maul, and if he could come to care about her… She could convince him to let her go. Maybe even convince him to come with her and escape the iron grip of his master.

Eventually, she left her quarters and made her way into the main apartment. She passed by the open door of the training room, stopped, stepped back and stared.

From what she could tell, Maul had been engaged in some early morning training, judging by the destroyed training droid laying in pieces on the floor. That wasn’t what had caught her attention, though. No, it was Maul stood by the medical unit, patching himself up, with his shirt removed.

He’d done it before many times, and Eldra had never paid him any mind. But after what she’d experienced in her dream, she couldn’t help but notice how sculpted his chest was. And all she could think about was being pressed against it in his arms, a thought that made her throat go dry.

Maul looked up from what he was doing, and upon seeing her his eyes lit up in a way that was definitely not adorable (nope, she was not using that word to describe a Sith Lord). He hurried over to her, not stopping to put his shirt back on, and Eldra knew instinctively that she was in deep trouble if he was going to do what she thought he was going to do in his state of half-undress.

“May I?”

It was strange, how a Sith Lord – who by his very nature should be selfish and have no qualms about taking whatever he wanted – always asked permission first before they kissed. He was supposed to represent the greatest evil of the galaxy, and yet in this regard, he was above many men who called themselves moral.

“Teeth check,” she said, because the second time he’d kissed her she’d noticed how dirty his teeth were, and had ordered him to clean them if he wanted to keep doing this with her. He’d grumbled about it but did as she asked, and she reasoned that since he didn’t smell, the dirty teeth were more about him trying to look intimidating and less about any lack of personal hygiene.

The young Sith rolled his eyes, but showed her his teeth all the same. They were clean. “Do they meet your approval?”

She nodded. “They do. Continue.”

Lightning fast, Maul swooped in and their lips crashed together. It felt like he was consuming her with the ravenous hunger of a starving man, and not wanting to be the submissive one, Eldra responded in kind. She pushed him back into the training room and used the Force to shut the door behind them.

His hands explored her body with a confidence he’d lacked the first time he’d done so. This hesitation, she guessed, had been forced upon him by his lack of experience with touching someone he didn’t want to kill. Eldra explored him in return, allowing her instincts to guide her as she pressed her hands against his bare chest, feeling both his hearts beating with excitement.

Every time she touched him, he purred. It was a sound that had taken her by surprise the first time he’d done it, but it had since grown on her and she found herself wanting to make him purr as much as was physically possible. It was actually quite funny, that this Sith Lord had gone from reminding her of a predatory Vornskr to reminding her of a touch-starved Tooka.

As the kiss intensified, Eldra’s whole body tingled with pleasure. She could feel the fire burning beneath her skin, and as flashes of her dream danced in her mind, the desire for more grew stronger until she was reacting to it and pulling Maul to the floor. They fell together and landed side-by-side, and Maul didn’t have time to ask what was happening before Eldra clambered on top of him and kissed him again.

A voice in her head was screaming at her to stop, to think about what she was doing. But it was being drowned out by her dream repeating itself over and over, telling her that there was nothing wrong; that it was the will of the Force.

It was also about being in control of the situation. She was not a victim, and she didn’t want to become one. If what she’d seen in her dream was an inevitable outcome, then she wanted to be the one to initiate it.

She was definitely in deep trouble.

\---

The past couple of weeks had been a revelation for Maul.

Every inch of his skin burned from the fire that had been ignited within him. Started by the Padawan, Eldra Kaitis, who was meant to be his enemy. But his greatest foe was becoming something more; someone he needed.

He’d thought that kissing her repeatedly would sate his desire, so whatever _feelings_ he had for her could fade. Then there would be no more confusing urges distracting him from his destiny. But they had instead done the opposite, leaving him wanting more from her.

What he felt for her wasn’t going away. Instead of being rid of her, all Maul wanted was to keep her.

Apart from the instance when she’d patched him up, he’d never been on the receiving end of a positive touch. The only form of touch he’d ever known was pain, from Sidious and anything else that had gotten close enough to land a blow. Because of this, he’d flinched beneath her gentle touch the first couple of times, before quickly growing used to it. Now all he wanted was for her to touch him all over.

Maul could hear the four beats of his hearts hammering in his ears, quickening their pace as the kiss deepened. He was lost in her touch; drowning in the light that surrounded her. When she pulled him to the floor, he fell with her willingly. And when she clambered on top of him, he held her in place and let her lead the way.

He never wanted her to stop. 


	9. Chapter Eight: Dangerous Game

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains mentions of sexual intercourse and Stockholm Syndrome. Again, nothing that doesn't require a higher rating.

I’ve fallen for a monster,

somehow he’s scaring me to death

– “Black Heart”, _Stooshe_

\---

There was blood on the inside of her thighs.

Eldra didn’t think about how it would rub onto her trousers as she quickly pulled them up, fastening them tightly as her feet hastily carried her back to her quarters. The part of her brain that wasn’t panicking wondered if the blood was normal. Of course the Jedi wouldn’t be teaching her these things. The Code forbade them from having the kinds of relationships that would lead to…

No. She shook her head as she entered her quarters. After shutting the door behind her, she locked it and just stood there, staring at nothing. Her head slowly fell forwards and she pressed her forehead to the door, its cool, smooth surface grounding her. She half-expected to hear footsteps following her, but none did.

She tried not to think about Maul, whom she’d left behind in the training room. Eldra could feel her face flushing from the horror that was sinking in; the realisation of what she’d just done of her own free will.

The desire that had clouded her mind was gone, taking with it memories of the bliss-laced dreams that had motivated her to do it in the first place. And with the absence of both, the reality of her actions sunk in.

What would her master think of her? What would her friends think of her? If they knew what she’d done, would they even welcome her back to the Order, if she ever escaped?

Her entire body began to shake. She could hear her heartbeat racing in her ears. The world started spinning around her, and it was getting harder to breathe.

Eldra closed her eyes and focussed on her breathing. She cleared her mind of all thoughts relating to what had just occurred, instead bringing forth one of her fondest memories: when her Initiate Clan had gone to Dexter’s in order to celebrate passing their trials. She’d sat on one side of the booth with Siri and Obi-Wan, the latter squished in the middle, while Bant, Garen and Reeft had sat opposite them.

They’d spent hours there, talking and laughing. And at the end of the day when they’d returned to the Temple, Master Vant had informed Eldra that she was to be the Padawan of Leora Ori.

She wanted to stay in her memories forever, but knew that she couldn’t ignore the present. At least she was no longer on the verge of a panic attack. Though she knew she was still conflicted internally, Eldra also knew she was safe from it consuming her, so she allowed herself to think over what had happened.

Blatantly ignoring the fact that she’d _done that_ with a _Sith Lord_ , she desperately clung to other questions she had about the encounter. Had she done it right? She was pretty sure she had, but there wasn’t exactly some kind of holomanual available to her because, again, Jedi Code. And she was certain that if she’d done something wrong, Maul would have told her.

That was another question. Had it been Maul’s first time too? She doubted the Sith would have time for that sort of thing, what with keeping themselves busy with their ultimate plot to destroy the Jedi. And there had been a lot of surprise in his expressions, like he hadn’t known what to expect; like he too was exploring all the sensations for the first time…

She knew he’d enjoyed it. And though she didn’t want to admit it, she’d enjoyed herself, too.

Her trousers began to stick to her thighs, reminding her of the blood still there. Sighing, Eldra grabbed the datapad she’d left on her bedside table and carried it into the refresher. She locked the door behind her in case Maul came knocking, feeling more secure in the knowledge that there were two locked doors between him and her. Not that she was afraid of what he would do if he got to her; she could take him. She just needed some space from him.

As she turned on the tap and let the water run, Eldra tried to focus. She’d enjoyed the experience, and hated that she had. It sounded crazy without context, but made perfectly logical sense in her head.

She just had to keep on top of her emotions, and not let what she’d seen in her dreams cloud her judgement. Because if things went too far…

During her studies in the Jedi Temple, she’d come across the psychological condition referred to as Tyrena Syndrome, named after an incident that occurred in the Corellian city of Tyrena. Bounty hunters had broken into a bank and taken several people hostage, all of whom defended the actions of their captors once they were rescued and refused to testify against them. One of the hostages had even married one of the captors after he was released.

The syndrome wasn’t as clean cut as that. There were sometimes other factors at play (especially in that particular incident; the incompetence of the law enforcement in how they responded to the situation had been more of a danger to the hostages than the actions of the captors had). And the debate over its qualification as a legitimate condition and what cases it applied to was still ongoing. But what most specialists seemed to agree on was what the symptoms were: developing positive feelings (be they romantic or platonic) for a captor, failing to recognise the captor as a threat, refusing to leave the captor, and rationalising the captor’s actions in a positive light.

Eldra repeated all this information in her head, even found herself bringing up the information on the datapad in case she’d missed anything. She had to keep telling herself that she wasn’t developing the syndrome. She’d never tried to rationalise Maul’s actions as acts of kindness, though she also understood that her situation could be worse. She knew that Maul and his master were both threats to her life, his master more so, since Maul had made it clear he himself didn’t want to kill her. She knew she would run away the first chance she got.

As for the positive feelings… The bond was there for her own survival and sanity, and while she had to make sure it didn’t grow beyond its limits, it didn’t blind her to the reality of her situation. She never tried to rationalise that Maul was a good person, in order to justify having feelings towards him. Though she supposed it was understandable why some people _would_ try to believe their captor was a good person, otherwise they’d have to face the truth that they loved a monster holding them against their will…

In her case, the truth kept her sane. And the truth was, the whole thing was messed up, and she was surprised that she hadn’t lost her mind. It helped to tell herself that Maul’s master was the true captor, and Maul was just as much a captive as she was. With that in mind, she could safely say that she didn’t have Tyrena Syndrome at all – but Maul probably did. Along with a ship load of other conditions that would make a therapist richer than the Banking Clan.

She finally looked up the reason there was blood on her thighs, whilst cleaning it away. From what she read, it was a normal occurrence for Humans and Near-Humans to bleed after their first sexual intercourse, including Twi’leks. Nothing was wrong with her physically, so she relaxed a bit more.

But she still had to deal with what had happened. Eldra soon realised that looking up a psychological condition that merely _could_ apply to her didn’t help her rationalise her situation. She was torn between what she’d seen in her dreams and the harsh reality of the waking world, and she had not a single idea as to how she could proceed.

The Force was unusually quiet, offering no guidance. Did that mean she needed to make the choice herself? To either pull away from Maul and never let it happen again, or dive in deep and potentially lose herself in the process?

Was she willing to put her trust in a future that was still in motion, if that meant further binding herself to a Sith?

After she’d cleaned herself up, she sensed Maul approaching her quarters. The refresher door was still locked, and she wanted to keep it that way.

But he didn’t try to enter her room. From what she could sense, he stood outside her door for a few minutes, as if debating whether or not to talk to her about what had just happened between them. But then he seemed to decide against it, and left.

Eldra wondered how long it would be before they had to address it.

\---

Maul could feel her presence in the refresher of her quarters. He knew she could sense him too, yet she remained where she was.

He raised his hand, wanting to open her door and… do _something_. Talk to her, kiss her, do what they’d just done again…

Though he’d been aware of pleasures of the flesh (as was aforementioned before), there was a difference between knowing about it and engaging with it himself. He couldn’t even begin to describe what he’d felt, being with Eldra in such an intimate way. But he didn’t want to think about it.

All Maul wanted was _her_ ; to be with her in any way he could. The pain he’d felt when she’d fled from him had been unbearable, and he never wanted to feel it again. The thought of the Jedi coming for her and ripping her away from him made him hate them all the more, and the sheer _power_ he felt in response to this unspoken vow was unlike any he’d felt before.

Actually, he had. In the arena at the prison, when the thought of her had helped him win a fight he’d been close to losing.

The passionate way he felt about her was something he could rely on to give him strength. That was the way of the Sith, wasn’t it? To draw power from his emotions? Hate and anger weren’t the only emotions that existed, though they were the only ones that had been taught to him by Sidious.

Speaking of his master… Maul’s commlink beeped with a summoning from Lord Sidious. He was tempted to ignore the call and instead spend his time with Eldra, but he knew he couldn’t. His master would punish him – and possibly Eldra, for being the cause of his distraction. The thought of his master hurting her filled him with dread.

It was the first time he feared for a life other than his own.

With one last lingering glance at Eldra’s closed door, Maul turned away.

He was soon travelling across Coruscant and into an industrial district known as The Works. Sidious favoured an abandoned circular tower that was strong in the dark side of the Force, a place where Maul had spent most of his childhood training under the Sith Lord. It was out of reach from any prying eyes and more importantly, any Jedi.

It reminded Maul of how far the Sith had fallen, that they had to remain hidden in the shadows, festering like rats. The Sith, he told himself, deserved to be out in the open, challenging the Jedi head on as they did thousands of years ago. It angered him that the Jedi had cast them down to such levels.

Maul found that he couldn’t muster any anger towards Eldra herself. That was strange.

When he arrived in the docking bay, his master was already waiting for him. The black hood he always wore hung down low over his face, masking his identity. “You are late, my apprentice.”

“My apologies, Master,” said Maul, kneeling before Sidious. “I have no excuse.”

Sidious didn’t comment on this. Instead he spoke of their plans, detailing how long it would be until they could reveal themselves. Another four years, he estimated. _Not soon enough_ , would have been Maul’s usual thoughts, but that was before he’d gained a Jedi sparring partner to keep him occupied and quench his bloodlust. Though he’d noticed that said bloodlust had calmed since meeting Eldra…

“Your thoughts betray you, Apprentice.”

Too late did Maul realise that he was purring; a Zabrak trait that Sidious had spent most of his childhood trying to beat out of him. Being with Eldra had brought the instinct back, and while he tried to only do it in her presence, simply thinking about her caused him to do it involuntarily.

And he’d done it in front of his master. Maul tried not to flinch, knowing that Sidious would strike him down if he showed any form of weakness. “My thoughts are focussed on our plan, Master.”

“And yet, I can sense them drifting away. You are distracted by other matters,” said Sidious. “They linger on the Padawan I allowed you to keep.”

“She has been a formidable opponent, Master,” Maul explained. “My skills have only improved since I began using her for my training. She has become a valuable asset.”

“That may be, but I sense a change in you. A change she has brought about.” Sidious considered him, and Maul kept his gaze averted to the floor. “Emotions drive us; they are what gives a Sith their power. But only certain emotions: anger, hate, the fear we install in others… Any other emotion is unnecessary. They are a weakness that can be exploited. What you feel for her distracts you from your true purpose.”

“I remain loyal only to you, my master.”

He huffed. “That may be the case now, but if these emotions are left unchecked, they could divide that loyalty.”

Maul was shocked. His master thought he would choose Eldra over him? It was inconceivable. “I would never betray you, Master. If you wish for me to kill her, then say the word, and I will do it.” Though he didn’t show it, those words threatened to tear him apart. Perhaps his master had a point; that he was becoming too attached to Eldra.

But even with that revelation, he couldn’t deny what he felt. He couldn’t go back to hating Eldra no matter how hard he tried.

“That pleases me to hear, my apprentice,” said Sidious. “For now, it is best you let her live, so you can continue to test your mettle.”

Maul hid his relief. “Of course, Master.”

The Force suddenly flared to life, and Maul was lifted from the floor in an invisible chokehold. The air left his lungs against his will, and his hands instinctively grabbed at his throat to try and remove the hand that was choking him, but the hand wasn’t there and there was nothing he could do to stop it. His whole body fought to take another breath, to survive, and rebelled against the helplessness he felt at his master’s mercy.

The man could end his life with a wave of his hand, and Maul couldn’t even fight back.

“But know this, my apprentice,” Sidious continued. “I can give the order to kill her at any time. And when it comes, you will follow my command immediately, or suffer the consequences. Do you understand?”

The Zabrak couldn’t speak, but managed to nod.

Sidious let him drop to the floor before he turned to walk away without a word, showing no concern for his apprentice. Not that this surprised Maul; he was used to it.

He couldn’t betray his master. But at the same time, he refused to think about striking Eldra down; refused to contemplate the notion of living in a world without her in it. Letting her go would destroy him.

There had to be a way around this; to remain loyal to his master and keep Eldra. Maul opened himself up to the Force for guidance, and received no response.

And he let his anger burn.

\---

After Maul left, Eldra waited in her quarters in case he made a quick return. When she determined that his trip would be a long one, she ventured into the main apartment in order to find something to eat.

Venny was seeing to matters she didn’t understand (and didn’t try to; it was Sith business), so she left the droid to it and sat on the sofa, quietly eating her meal. She was in the middle of reading the latest holojournal on the datapad when she sensed the droid approach her, uncharacteristically quiet.

“What?” she asked, turning to him. “Are you going to berate me about treading mud on the floor? It wasn’t me because one: I never go outside, and two: there’s no mud on Coruscant. It was probably Maul from one of his stupid hunting expeditions.” Bantering with the droid was a normalcy she needed to hold onto, in the wake of everything that was happening.

“Eldra.”

That caught her attention. Venny rarely used her name; hadn’t used it much since she’d first arrived. He usually referred to her as “that Jedi” or “the Padawan”, along with a string of colourful language that would’ve made her master blush.

The fact that he’d used her name meant that he was being serious.

“Yes?” she asked. “Is this the part where you tell me I’m going to die?”

“No,” he said. “Not that I know of. But you could, if you continue down this path. Please, be careful.”

Eldra narrowed her eyes at him. “Were you listening to us do… _that_?”

“I was trying not to, but you were so loud, it was hard to block it out.”

“Sorry.” She blushed with embarrassment. “I’ll try and be quieter the next time I’m riding my mortal enemy. And since when are you concerned about me?”

His head tilted as he considered her. “I am not normally a fan of sacks of flesh, but you have grown on me, Eldra Kaitis. Though I would appreciate it if you ceased mocking my holodramas.”

She laughed. “I make no promises, but I’ll try and restrain myself.”

The droid suddenly straightened. “Master Maul has returned. He will reach the apartment shortly.”

Eldra wasted no time in hurrying back to her quarters. She locked the door behind her and waited, wondering if Maul would seek her out or if he was going to avoid her. She silently prayed to the Force that he would do the latter; though she’d had time to process what had happened, she still didn’t want to see him.

Maul entered the apartment with a loud roar, which was followed by several crashes. Eldra jumped, and couldn’t help but be battered by his emotions. He was angry, but she was relieved when she sensed that he wasn’t angry at her. The anger itself wasn’t surprising, but this anger felt… different. Like he didn’t know _why_ he was angry.

There were more crashes, and Eldra realised that there was a very good chance that Venny could get caught in the crossfire of whatever tantrum Maul was throwing. And after the concern the droid had showed her, he didn’t deserve to get torn apart for no reason.

Taking a breath of courage, Eldra left her quarters and hurried into the main apartment. The Sith was in the process of smashing his fist against the wall when she entered, and though he hadn’t yet put a hole in it, he was close.

This was the man she was giving her body to. She needed to do something before the whole situation spun out of control.

After taking a moment to compose herself, she yelled out, “Maul!”

He spun around, and the second his gaze fell on her, his anger seemed to evaporate. Not completely, but it returned to its usual levels.

Maul stared at her in silence, breathing heavily. The apartment was a mess, but luckily Venny wasn’t anywhere in sight. Eldra guessed that the droid had made his escape quickly to avoid getting trashed.

She didn’t break her gaze with the young Sith, and she didn’t say a word. Somehow, she knew that Maul needed to make the first move.

And he did. He moved fast, probably under the belief that she would run back to her room if he didn’t get to her quickly. When he reached her, he didn’t hesitate to pull her against him, clutching her tightly as he buried his nose against her neck. His deep breaths gradually slowed, and the trembling of his body began to fade.

Eldra frowned. Was her presence _comforting_ him? She didn’t try to move away from him, in case this was true.

Her arms were pressed up against his chest. Very slowly, she encircled them around him. His body went still but he otherwise didn’t react, so she began to gently stroke her fingers along his back. After doing this for a minute, he began to relax under her touch, and a loud purr escaped past his lips.

She had her enemy in her arms, and it felt not only natural, but nice. At best, it should have felt strange. At worst, it should have felt wrong.

Maybe she needed to stop thinking about what was right and wrong.

Maul lifted his head up slightly, but didn’t pull back. Instead he whispered in her ear, “What have you done to me?”

Eldra had no response to that, so she didn’t reply. And she didn’t resist when she felt him begin to remove their clothes. 


	10. Chapter Nine: What Will You Choose?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Try to listen to the songs I've quoted before/during/after reading the chapters. They're there for a reason. ;)

And if I bleed

you’ll be the last to know

– “Cruel Summer”, _Taylor Swift_

\---

In all his years as a Sith, Sidious had learned to never grow too attached to his plans. As great an architect as he was when it came to planning and predicting the moves of others, the universe was constantly in motion. Not everything reacted as he predicted. Plans changed.

Throwing a needless tantrum whenever things didn’t go his way was counterproductive. Instead he re-planned, made compromises, took advantage of whatever came of these sudden unpredicted events.

The Padawan had been a welcomed asset. He had planned for his apprentice to fight her, and had expected Maul to come out on top. But the Padawan surprised him with her strength, and with her unexpected anger on top, Sidious had considered letting her kill Maul so that he might take her as a new apprentice.

That thought had lasted but a moment. There was too much light in her; too much defiance. And while the Sith were born in defiance, too much of it in an apprentice would never do. So, he allowed his apprentice to take her; use her for his training. It had certainly worked, for Sidious could sense the growing power in the young Zabrak. He was becoming an unstoppable weapon against the Jedi.

But there was that… attachment issue. Sidious should have known that giving his apprentice a _female_ Padawan of the same age would lead to this problem emerging.

When he’d first sensed the emotions radiating from his apprentice, he’d almost ordered Maul to kill her straight away. A distraction such as her would interfere with his plans. What stopped him was a thought that occurred to him; something he’d considered before, but hadn’t acted upon.

As the Jedi had their Trials for Knighthood, so too did the Sith have their own trials. Or rather, one in particular that needed to be performed in order for one to truly embrace the dark side. The Sith Sacrifice.

Sidious had murdered his entire family, sacrificing them in order to gain more power in the dark side. The event had been a revelation, and opened his eyes to just how powerful he could be. But many a time, he had realised that with no connections and no one to care for, his apprentice would not be able to make such a sacrifice.

Until now.

Eldra Kaitis would be his sacrifice. Maul had already promised to kill her on his master’s orders, but a promise was just words. He needed to carry it out in order to prove his devotion to the Sith. All Sidious had to do was wait for the perfect moment; wait until Maul cared just enough about her that killing her would drive him so deep into the dark side, he’d never come out again.

And that remained his plan until the Force shifted, and he sensed another presence.

It was small, still growing – and he knew exactly what it was.

\---

It was the third time Eldra had thrown up. Something was wrong.

Added to that, she could sense something in the Force. Something she couldn’t quite make out. It felt like a tickle at the back of her neck; there but not completely. Faint, but growing. She couldn’t figure out what it was.

And of course, Maul was away on another mission, leaving her alone with the problem. Eldra pushed down the feeling of loneliness that came with the thought. She refused to become dependant on him; refused to feel helpless without him around.

With a sigh, she decided to suck it up and go to Venny for help. The droid would be able to scan her for any illnesses or injuries she could have, and determine whether or not she needed medical attention. Not that she’d be able to leave in order to receive it. Venny would have to play doctor to the best of his ability.

She left her refresher and then her quarters, searching for the droid. “Venny? You around? I’ve got a vomiting problem you need to help me with. I promise I won’t throw up on you. Much.” There was no answer. Eldra walked into the main apartment area, frowning.

A second later, she was overcome by a dark presence. A second after that, she realised that the presence felt familiar.

“Eldra Kaitis.”

She was suddenly pushed to the floor by the Force, facing downwards. It pinned her down, unrelenting, and Eldra felt her heartrate accelerate in response. So used to the calming presence of the Force, it felt like a betrayal to be at its mercy; to feel so helpless in the face of its raw power. She bit her lip to stop herself from crying out.

The darkness felt like it was suffocating her. Eldra latched onto the light inside of her and did whatever she could to keep it burning; thought of her friends, thought of her home, recited the Jedi Code in her mind… All the while the darkness kept closing in, invading her body and her mind. She was like a single candle in a black hole, staring at the event horizon and unable to stop it from sucking away her very being.

Unable to move even an inch, she forced herself to stop struggling and instead waited for her attacker to make himself known. She knew who he was. The dark memory of him had haunted her nightmares ever since her capture.

The Sith Master drifted past her, his black cloak trailing along the floor. With half her face pressed against the floor, it was the only part of him she could see, though she feared to look at his face even if she could.

“What do you want?” she demanded, trying to sound defiant but unable to keep her voice from trembling slightly.

“To congratulate you, of course,” said the Sith. His voice was unlike anything she’d ever heard; like he was using the dark side of the Force to speak. She wondered what he actually sounded like without it. “Have you told my apprentice the good news yet?”

“And what good news is that?” she spat back.

He chuckled. “That he is to be a father, of course.”

Eldra froze and felt her blood turn to ice.

No.

It wasn’t true. He was lying.

And yet, the Force screamed that it was the truth. The presence she could feel but couldn’t quite make out… The fact that she’d been throwing up…

She was pregnant. With Maul’s child.

The emotions raged within her. Joy that she had created life, had done something she thought as a Jedi she would never get to do. Fear of what would happen to her, and subsequently to the child, when Maul found out. Anger that she was to be a mother in such bleak circumstances…

And anger at the Sith Master stood before her.

Because the one thing that screamed the loudest within her was determination. She suddenly knew with every fibre of her being that nothing was going to hurt her child. Not Maul, not this Sith Lord… She would die before anyone touched her baby.

She felt her inner candle flare brighter, fighting harder against the black hole of the dark side that surrounded her.

“If you hurt my baby, I swear-”

The Force pushed her harder against the floor. She found herself struggling to breathe.

“I have not intention of killing you, or the child,” said the Sith. “I have other plans. You see, your child would be born from both the Jedi and the Sith. It would hold such a power that has never been seen before. A fine candidate for a Sith assassin, don’t you think?”

Eldra couldn’t speak due to the pressure he was forcing on her. She tried to fight against his hold, but the Force betrayed her and kept her pinned.

“And after the child has been born, I will have no more use for you,” the Sith continued. “My apprentice will dispose of you.”

Her vision blurred. She was crying.

The thought of her child being taken… It shattered her. And then there was the thought of Maul not only killing her, but going along with his master’s plan. The time they had spent together, since their bond had taken an unexpected turn…

It meant something to her, as much as she hated to admit it. And she could sense that it meant something to Maul, too. But would it be enough for him to turn on his master?

She already knew the answer. No. He was too devoted to the Sith; too certain that this dark path was his destiny. Plus, she had no idea if he even wanted to be a father; if he would even care that he had a child. For all she knew, he would give the child the same upbringing he himself had at the hands of his master.

That possibility hurt even more than the thought of his master taking the child.

Footsteps vibrated across the floor. “Until the next time, Eldra Kaitis. Do not damage my property before I can come and claim it.”

The apartment door shut behind him, and only then was Eldra released.

She shot upright, gasping for breath. Her muscles ached, and she couldn’t even stand; she could only manage to pull herself onto the sofa with some effort. The silence of the apartment helped calm her nerves somewhat, but she knew it was only temporary. She was in the eye of a hurricane. It was only a matter of time before Maul returned, and then… Then…

There were footsteps behind her and Eldra tensed up until she realised they were the familiar mechanical ones of Venny. The droid’s presence relaxed her.

“Eldra, are you alright?”

What a loaded question.

Still reeling from the revelation, she said, “Scan me. That sleemo told me I’m pregnant, and I need to know if it’s true.”

“Can the Force not tell you that?”

“Just do it!”

He scanned her without further comment. It didn’t take him very long, and the results came back right away.

“You are indeed pregnant,” he told her. “From what my scanner tells me, you are two months along.”

And it hit her all over again.

There was no room for dependency. There was no room for feelings of helplessness. She was going to be a mother, and her first priority was to protect her child at all costs. Even if she needed to protect the child from their father.

\---

Something had shifted in the Force.

Maul couldn’t tell what it was. The Force had felt a little off since he’d left Coruscant two months before, and had continued to feel slightly different for the entirety of his mission. Now that it had finished and he was returning home, he could tell that something had definitely changed.

The second he stepped into the apartment, he knew his master had been there.

“Eldra!” he cried out. Her name passed through his lips without thought.

He tried not to panic, but couldn’t stop the feeling from creeping up on him. His master hadn’t given the order, but then Maul had been away on a mission so Sidious could have killed her himself, only Maul would have felt it if she’d died…

The sudden urge to tear everything around him apart overwhelmed him. There was a chance that she was alive but that Sidious had taken her, only he could feel her in the apartment, but then what if it was a trick by his master to make it only _seem_ like she was there when she was instead miles away getting tortured and Maul was wasting time, he needed to find her and breathe in her scent to assure himself she was OK…

She appeared from the direction of her quarters. The way she carried herself seemed different, but that didn’t matter. Maul was hit with a wave of relief and hurried over to her. He needed to feel her against him after many weeks apart, but when he reached out for her, she stepped back.

Such a small, simple movement. And it stabbed him in his hearts.

It was unlike her. He wanted to grab her regardless of her resistance, but something in her eyes stopped him. And the Force… The shift he had felt converged around her, and there was another presence he could sense. It was new, but not in the way Eldra’s had felt new when he first met her. It was new in that it hadn’t existed until recently.

“Eldra, what is it?” he asked. “Is something wrong? My master was here… I can still feel him. Did he hurt you?”

“Why do you care if he did or not?” she replied. “You’ll kill me one day on his orders, and don’t pretend that you won’t.”

Maul clenched his fist, but couldn’t argue against her. It was true that when Sidious gave the order, he would cut her down without question. But it would tear him apart to do so, and he wanted to tell her that. Something stopped him.

“Eldra, please tell me what happened?” He reached out to her again, but she flinched and took another step back. She looked afraid. And he hated that she did. “Eldra?”

She looked him in the eye and said, with a flat tone, “I’m pregnant.”

For a moment, it didn’t register what she’d said. Because children and families were something he’d never given a single thought to; something the Sith shouldn’t have. In that way, they were like the Jedi, only the Jedi considered family attachments to be a path to the dark side, while the Sith considered them a weakness and a distraction.

But then her words slowly sunk in. Eldra was pregnant. He had fathered a child with her.

And for some reason, it terrified him. But he couldn’t understand why.

“We should have been more careful,” Eldra continued. “We should have taken precautions. I guess it’s understandable, that neither of us would consider using some form of protection. It’s not like either the Jedi or the Sith ever think about these things… But after months of fooling around, one of us should’ve… I should’ve…”

She looked just as scared as him. He still didn’t understand his own terror, and didn’t really understand hers. But he wanted to comfort her, an urge that felt alien to him. He didn’t act on it though – didn’t think she would welcome any kind of attempt, after her initial reaction to him – and instead focussed on what had driven him to call out for her in the first place.

“My master was here. Why?” But he already suspected.

Eldra barked a laugh. She still looked afraid, but something else drowned it out. Determination. “He came to “congratulate” me. And by “congratulate”, I mean he came to rub it in my face that he intends to use my baby as a living weapon against the Jedi, have you kill me when I’m no longer useful as a baby-making machine, and that there was nothing I could do about it.”

On the one hand, it made sense. The child would be strong in the Force; not only were both its parents Force-wielders, but one was a Jedi while the other was a Sith. Such a parentage was bound to produce a powerful offspring, no doubt about it. It made perfectly logical sense that Sidious would want to use the child for his own purposes. And it made perfectly logical sense that Eldra would serve no purpose afterwards.

On the other hand, his master’s intentions terrified him out of his mind.

He couldn’t find his voice, so Eldra kept talking. “I’ve been patient, waiting for an opportunity to get out of here, but I can’t wait any longer. I have another life to take care of. Maul, I need to get out of here _now_.”

His hands snapped out and grabbed her in an instant, as if he expected her to run away from him at that moment. The thought of her presence no longer being there, being unable to sense her… It was bad enough when he had to leave her to go on missions, but at least he could return to her. The thought of her being gone forever…

“ _No_ ,” he growled. “Your place is with me.”

Her expression didn’t change. “Then come with me. We can escape him together. You’re his captive, just like me. You didn’t choose this life. You don’t have to stay in the dark; you don’t have to suffer for a power that will never be worth it. We can get away from him, go to the Jedi and tell them-”

At the mention of the Jedi Order, Maul’s grip on her tightened. She dared to try and sway him? She dared to try and lead him away from his destiny? “I am a Sith Lord! This is my destiny! The Jedi deserve to pay for what they have done to my Order, and I will never go to them for… for _help_! _I_ am staying here, and _you_ are staying with me!”

What he didn’t say was that even if they tried to escape, Sidious would stop them. And he would make them wish for death.

Eldra struggled out of his grip, spun on her heel and ran into her quarters. Maul didn’t bother to chase her down; he knew she had locked him out, and wouldn’t want to see him anytime soon. With a roar, he crumpled a nearby chair in on itself using the Force. He didn’t acknowledge the mess he’d made; the droid would clean it up later.

Maul sunk down onto the sofa, and for the first time in his life, he felt helpless. And he didn’t even know why. 


	11. Chapter Ten: Heartstone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up that this chapter includes some time jumps.

How you turned my world,

you precious thing

– “Within You”, _David Bowie_

\---

_Three months pregnant…_

“I will admit that I am not the most knowledgeable when it comes to sacks of flesh, but I am certain that most of you do not eat a seaweed roll covered in frosty treat.”

Eldra poked her tongue out at the droid, since she was in a bad enough mood to let herself be overtaken by the childish urge. She was sat on the sofa with her legs outstretched, leaning against the arm with the bowl of food resting on her lap. The rational part of her agreed with Venny that the meal before her was disgusting, and if she was still experiencing morning sickness she would have definitely thrown up at the smell by now. The pregnant part of her, meanwhile, screamed at her to gobble up the food before anyone could come along and steal it.

She stabbed violently at the seaweed roll with her fork before shovelling an oversized bite in her mouth, the melted frosty treat dripping back into the bowl. Immersing herself in her weird food cravings helped her ignore how she was still in shock at everything that had happened, how the entire situation was screwed up and unfair, and how _pointless_ everything felt in the face of her unavoidable death.

“I plan to watch the latest episode of _The High Republic_ later, if you wish to join me,” said Venny. He was still standing above her, unmoving. “I will let you make fun of it, if it makes you feel better.”

“No thanks,” Eldra muttered between mouthfuls. “I just wanna be left alone.” Her gaze was drawn to the apartment window, and she stared wishfully out at the people driving by. She wondered how many women on Coruscant were pregnant.

The longing to see another face – _any_ face – was growing by the day. Normally she would fill that hole by spending time with either one of the two she was sharing the apartment with, but thanks to the pregnancy, she could only tolerate seeing one of them. The other had been relegated back to just having interactions with her whenever they sparred, because she could only stand to be around him whenever she was beating him up.

Her anger at him trumped her loneliness. She didn’t know how long that would last.

Maul’s response had been exactly what Eldra expected, but she’d had to try. And even though his dedication to the Sith and to his master didn’t surprise her, she still felt betrayed by his response.

Someone like Maul, who had been raised and conditioned into a killer… He was someone that couldn’t be helped. At least, _she_ couldn’t help him. How _could_ she reach him, when he rejected everything she stood for? When he had known no other life than what the Sith had taught him? The only person who could help Maul was himself. And Eldra didn’t have much hope that he’d ever bring himself to do that.

She felt powerless. She couldn’t help her child, she couldn’t help Maul… She would be forced to watch the Sith master ruin them both, only that wasn’t true because he planned to have her killed when her usefulness ran its course. In which case, she would die knowing that the Sith master would ruin them both.

“Eldra?”

The Twi’lek snapped her head towards the droid. “What?”

Venny wasn’t intimidated by her snippy tone. “You need to calm yourself. Your stress and anxiety levels are higher than they should be-”

“Oh, I think I have every reason to be stressed and anxious!” she told him. “Or do I need to remind you why?”

“I understand it is hard,” he said, and he sounded like he actually meant it. “But stress could complicate your pregnancy or cause you to lose your baby altogether. I have been ordered to give you a sedative if you cannot remain calm.”

Eldra sat bolt upright. “A sedative could be just as harmful to the baby!”

“This particular one will not harm your child in any way,” said Venny. “I do not wish to do this, but I cannot disobey. The order had been programmed into me. My master wants this baby to be born.”

She didn’t need to guess to know which of his masters had given that order, and it wasn’t Maul. The dread threatened to overwhelm her, but she pushed it away. There was no choice; either she needed to calm herself, or she would be forced to stay calm against her will, and she preferred to have control over her own emotions. Overcoming the fear, the feeling of helplessness and hopelessness… She needed to draw on every ounce of her Jedi training in order to stay calm.

Maul suddenly appearing didn’t help.

Eldra felt his gaze on her; felt it burning at the back of her neck. She refused to acknowledge him, instead climbing to her feet and keeping her back turned to him as she handed her empty bowl back to Venny.

“Tell your master there’s no need to use a sedative on me,” she told the droid, loud enough so that Maul could hear her words, too. “I’ll play along. But make sure he knows that I’ll do everything in my power to stop him from getting his hands on my baby.”

She marched passed Maul without sparing him a sideways glance. From the corner of her eye, she saw him reach out for her, before thinking better of it and retracting his hand. Which was for the best. Eldra would have been far too tempted to ignite her lightsaber and cut it off if he’d touched her.

Once she was safely in her quarters with the door locked behind her, Eldra sat on her bed with her legs crossed. Before her was an impossible uphill climb: trying to overcome the emotions that were born naturally from her situation. How could she stay calm when she knew what would happen once she gave birth?

Eldra shook her head. She was a Jedi. She wasn’t ruled by her emotions.

Her eyes closed. “There is no emotion. There is peace…”

\---

_Four months pregnant…_

The thing Maul liked most about the underworld of Coruscant was that he could blend into the crowd so easily. No one spared him a second glance; no one whispered slanders about his appearance or hurried their children away from him. In the underworld, he was just another nameless face that no one cared about.

He wasn’t on a mission for his master. The young Sith needed time away from the apartment, to let himself think without Eldra’s presence lingering close by. (It was usually comforting, but on this particular day she was too distracting. Especially since she was still doing her best to avoid him outside of training, and Maul didn’t know how much longer he could take of her being so close but being unable to touch her.)

Even though it had been only two months since he’d found out, he was still reeling from how his life had taken such an unexpected turn. He had created life with Eldra; had done something he’d never even considered. It felt almost surreal to picture himself as a father. He’d seen families together on his travels, and had witnessed fathers bonding with their children in displays that were alien to him. He’d never had a father, only a master. What would it be like, to have such a small, precious life depend on him?

Only, he wouldn’t find out. His master intended to take the child away and raise it himself, the same way he had raised Maul. And this fact had Maul conflicted in a way he’d never been before.

On the one hand, Sidious was his master, and Maul had no choice but to obey him. But on the other hand, the thought of his master taking away his child… It just felt _wrong_. And on top of that, Maul would be ordered to kill Eldra too, and every time he pictured it, he rejected the images he saw. He couldn’t accept that she would have to die.

But he also knew he couldn’t go against his master’s orders.

Maul shook his head. He couldn’t lose control of himself, not on the streets with witnesses. The birth was months away. Nothing had to change. Right now, Eldra was still alive, and he needed to live in the present and enjoy every moment with her.

If only she would stop keeping him at arms’ length.

He needed to convince her to let him in again, because while she was always close by, he missed her. Missed touching her, missed kissing her, missed their talks… He’d grown so used to her being part of his life, suddenly having her cut out of it despite her close proximity _hurt_. It caused him more pain than he was willing to admit, and he couldn’t accept continuing on like this.

“Gemstones! Get your gemstones here!”

Maul paused and looked around. He’d entered one of the many old markets that were common on the lower levels of Coruscant. Dozens of stalls lined the city walls, selling all sorts of merchandise that was more often than not illegal. There was no one around to stop them; very few police droids patrolled these levels, and any Jedi that wandered down this far typically had bigger fish to fry.

The stall closest to Maul was filled with gemstones. No kyber crystals; they were too rare. But the stones that _were_ on sale were from all over the galaxy, all different colours and sizes. The man selling them was a middle-aged Human who looked just as clean as the street he’d set up shop on (which was to say, not very).

He was serving a young Togruta male, who had purchased a necklace with a pink stone hanging from it. “Trust me, your girl will love it!” the merchant was saying. “She sees that beauty, she’ll forgive you for sure!”

Maul barely noticed the Togruta passing him. The words he’d overheard echoed in his mind as he moved closer to the stall, eyeing up all the gemstones that were on offer.

The merchant looked him up and down. “What can I get for you? How about something to match that pearl on your ear?”

The small, pearl-like earring on the upper part of his left ear almost burned as if it sensed it had been acknowledged. But Maul didn’t pay it any mind, nor did he answer the man’s question. He could feel the Force nudge him closer, and when he took another step, something caught his eye.

It was a dark red stone attached to a small, black chain. A necklace.

“Tell me what stone this is,” he said, pointing.

“A man with good taste,” said the merchant. “That there is a red garnet. Symbolises love, so they say. There’re many a stone of love, but that one represents the eternal passion of love. It’s said that if you give a red garnet to the one you love, it strengthens your bond. There’s this old myth on the garnet’s homeworld, telling the tale of the God of Death and Chaos who kidnapped the Goddess of Life and Light, and in order to win her love he gave her a pomegranate that was filled with red garnets instead of seeds-”

“How much?” Maul interrupted, never taking his eyes off the necklace.

The merchant didn’t seem phased by his bluntness, and with a smile, he gave Maul a price that was obvious too high for such a small trinket. The young Sith bartered with the merchant until the price was reasonable, and after handing over the credits, he walked away with a small red pouch containing the garnet necklace.

On the walk back to the apartment, he couldn’t help but question himself over the decision. He’d bought the necklace on a whim, and was only now considering the outcomes. Did Eldra even like jewellery? Would giving her a simple little trinket really cool her anger towards him?

When he arrived back at the apartment, Eldra was sat on the sofa with the datapad on her lap. There was a small smile on her face as she read, she was humming softly, and she radiated calm through the Force. It set Maul at ease to see her content.

But then she looked up and saw him, and her smile faded. Her happy demeanour cracked ever so slightly, and Maul realised that she was putting up a front; pretending that everything was fine in order to keep herself calm. Underneath the delicate façade, Maul could sense what she really felt, and it concerned him.

A voice in his head that sounded like his master demanded that he take what he wanted, regardless of Eldra’s feelings in the matter. She was his, and if he wanted to spend time with her outside of training, then she would have to suck it up and deal with it.

Only, he couldn’t bring himself to force her. He could only watch as she silently got up from the sofa and retreated into her quarters.

The red pouch burned in his hand, like it demanded to be given to its rightful owner. Maul ignored the sensation and instead made his way into his own quarters, where he stashed the necklace away in a safe place. Maybe now wasn’t the right time to give it to her, but perhaps he would have another opportunity in the future.

At least, he hoped so.

\---

_Five months pregnant…_

“I can’t do this anymore.”

Maul stared at her like the ground had been removed from underneath him. “What?”

Eldra rolled her eyes. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m carrying some extra weight here.” She gestured to her growing belly; with its size, there was no doubt that she was pregnant. “Extra weight that can’t be thrown around.”

“We can be careful,” Maul argued, desperation in his eyes. “Practise the basic steps.” He moved closer to her. “Eldra, this is the only time I see you. I can’t lose this, too. I can’t lose you…” He tried to take her hand.

He was too close. Eldra felt like he was backing her into a corner, and his dark presence invaded her space like a sickness. But the worst part of it was: she could still feel their bond. It was calling out to her, begging for her to reconnect, to let Maul touch her. And part of her wanted to give in and get lost in feelings that scared her in the best way.

She couldn’t. Because giving in meant accepting her fate; accepting the darkness.

The Force gathered around her, and she used it to push him away. Not too far, and it wasn’t enough to push him over; he slid backwards on his feet and stared at her in shock. She watched the anger build in his eyes, and she let it fuel her own.

“You already _have_!” she yelled. “You lost me when you refused to stand against the man who wants to take our child away! The man who wants you to kill me without regret!”

And suddenly against her control, her anger left her in one smooth motion, replaced with overwhelming sadness. Because the father of her child was choosing power over them, and _still_ expected to be part of her life, and it was hitting her all over again. Her vision blurred with tears.

Maul once again stepped towards her. “Eldra…”

“Get away from me!” She hurried passed him and ran out of the training room, not stopping until she’d reached her quarters. She locked the door behind her and collapsed onto the bed.

It took her a while to calm down.

Once she had wiped away her tears, she reflected on what had happened. She’d experienced mood swings before, but that had been one of her most violent ones to date. Venny had warned her that like with stress, being angry all the time could impact the health of the baby. Mood swings were a natural part of pregnancy, but she knew that she needed to try and keep on top of them. Eldra needed to be patient with herself.

And perhaps, she needed to be patient with Maul. Because now that she’d stopped their only remaining interaction, she knew it was only a matter of time before Maul tried to communicate with her in other ways. And only a matter of time before she let him in.

\---

_Six months pregnant…_

Maul was impressed with himself, that he’d been able to hold out for this long.

But since Eldra had ended their training sessions (with good reason, he couldn’t argue with that), the urge to be close to her again was near impossible to ignore. And added to that were her own emotions which he couldn’t help but sense through the Force, despite her efforts to repress them.

She still desired him. He was relieved that her proclamations of wanting nothing more to do with him were just words and didn’t reflect how she really felt. Granted, he could sense that her desire was only the sexual kind, but that didn’t matter. He’d take whatever he could get.

He wisely chose not to confront her directly. Instead he removed the garnet necklace from its hiding place and left it on top of the datapad, where she would easily find it. All he had to do was wait.

Maul watched from the shadows as Eldra left the kitchen with a warm cup of hot chocolate in her hands. She approached the sofa slowly, and it wasn’t until she’d sat down that she noticed the necklace. Her eyes brightened up in a way Maul had never seen before, like she was thinking “ooh, pretty”. Picking the necklace up, she held it in front of her face in order to get a closer look at the gemstone.

After a few moments of contemplation, her face fell and she turned towards him. “Buying me a pretty necklace isn’t going to win me over.”

Stepping out of the shadows, he asked, “Then what will?”

“You know what will.”

He refused to contemplate what she was referring to. And the reminder brought forwards all the confusing and conflicting feelings about what was to happen after the child’s birth; feelings he repressed daily. It was easier to pretend that the future was non-existent.

Maul quickly crossed the room and sat down by her side, taking her hands in his before she could pull them away. He felt his whole body relax when their skin made contact. _Finally_. “Eldra, please. I need you with me. And I know you want me, too. I can sense your desire.”

“That’s just my stupid hormones,” she said. But she didn’t pull away, and was still holding the necklace in her hands.

Moving carefully so he didn’t startle her, Maul took the necklace and unclipped the chain. She didn’t try to stop him as he maneuvered the thin chain around her neck and reclipped it together, before leaning back to admire her. The garnet sat perfectly just above her breasts.

They sat in silence for a few minutes before he finally said, “I want things to go back to the way they were. I miss you.”

And then he saw it in her eyes: her resolve breaking.

“OK.”

He wanted to dive in and kiss the life out of her – but she beat him to the punch. 


	12. Chapter Eleven: Echoes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there's going to be quite a bit of world-building in this chapter. In terms of the continuity of this story, I'm going (for the most part) with Disney's canon and then hand-picking and re-working stuff I like from Legends. This leaves a lot of gaps to fill in, and in this chapter I'll be diving into some of Ryloth's history and culture. The story told in this chapter is inspired by both the story of Moses and the French Revolution.

What could I do to change your mind?

Nothing

– “Sledgehammer”, _Rihanna_

\---

_Seven months pregnant…_

“Why do you sacks of flesh insist upon being so difficult?”

Eldra laughed, sinking deeper into the sofa. “I don’t see how wanting to be surprised equals ‘being difficult’.”

“If we knew the gender of the child,” Venny explained as he paced, one hand behind his back while he waved his other hand around, finger pointed, “then it would make my shopping far easier. What if I discovered it for myself and simply did not tell you?”

“I’d figure it out pretty quickly once I saw your purchases,” said Eldra. “Just get some gender-neutral things and we’ll be fine.” She forced herself to keep smiling, not wanting to tell the droid that it wouldn’t matter anyway, once the baby was born. The Sith master would take the child, and she’d be dead.

Her mind sounded like a broken record, always repeating those same facts, but she couldn’t forget them no matter how hard she tried. For her own sanity and for the health of the baby, she was keeping up a calm and reasonably happy exterior. She’d even started to let Maul back in. But none of that changed the fact that she was slowly dying inside, knowing her days were numbered and being unable to do anything about it.

Venny let out the droid equivalent of a sigh before he picked up his own datapad – a smaller version than the regular one, which he used for her weekly check-ups – from the table and tucked it under his arm. “I still find it illogical that you do not wish to know the gender of your own child, but I will respect your decision.”

When he was gone, Eldra dropped her fake smile and rested a hand on her expanded belly. In truth, her unwillingness to learn the baby’s gender was less about wanting to be surprised and more about preventing a deeper attachment to her child. She told herself that if she didn’t know the gender until the birth, it would make the inevitable ever so slightly easier.

Just like lying to herself made things easier.

Pushing those thoughts away, Eldra sat upright and retrieved from the table a pad of paper and a pencil. Both were archaic tools hardly ever used in most of the galaxy, but Venny had bought them for her after learning that drawing and creating art helped with relaxation. Eldra didn’t know if it was better or worse that her happy façade wasn’t fooling anyone. (She didn’t think it was fooling Maul either, only he didn’t show it since he seemed to be in even deeper denial than she was.)

As her hand moved across the paper, absentmindedly drawing patterns, Eldra’s thoughts wandered back to the matter at hand. She wondered if she was being a bad mother for not doing everything in her power to escape and protect her child. But what else could she do? There was no means of sending a message into the outside world; she’d checked again after falling pregnant. And any attempt to leave the building would cause not just herself to blow up, but her unborn child, too.

The only possibility still on the table was to convince Maul to help her, and he’d already rejected her pleas. She’d hoped that if she let him in again, he would change his mind, but so far it had come to nothing. Eldra hadn’t expected the change to happen overnight; he needed to undo years of conditioning and brainwashing, and things like that took time.

_Time_ that was running out.

Her hand touched the garnet stone hanging around her neck. While getting her something pretty had been a weak attempt at making it up to her, she knew his heart was in the right place, and it was a step forwards she hadn’t expected would come. It was what had convinced her to let him back in. If she could just draw that side out of him more often and try to make him understand that what they had and the life of their child were worth more than whatever power his master had promised him…

“What are those symbols?”

Eldra had already sensed Maul’s approach, so wasn’t surprised by his sudden appearance. What _did_ surprise her was what she’d drawn on the paper without realising.

A series of swirl patterns climbed up the paper, branching out elegantly from one another like a plant growing up the side of a tree. And just like that she was overtaken by memories of her life back in the Temple, when she’d poured over information about her culture and had been fascinated by the swirls that showed up wherever she looked. The story and history behind them had quickly become her favourite.

“Back on Ryloth, these swirls are called the Mark of Freedom,” she replied. “It became an important symbol of hope for a culture that knew nothing but slavery for thousands of years – and whose people are still sold as slaves today in some parts of the galaxy.”

Maul sat down beside her, and in his eyes, she could see the need to know more. Something she’d noticed quickly about him since their talks had first started was that for a man who loved to fight and typically solved all his problems with violence, he was very intelligent and enjoyed learning. It was something she couldn’t help but like about him. “And who first created these symbols?”

“They weren’t created,” she explained. “They’re a very rare skin pattern that can only be found on the lekku of Rutian Twi’leks, like me. And my skin tone is already the second rarest colour to begin with.”

“You don’t have them,” Maul noted.

“We don’t all have them. I meant that they can only _occur_ with our skin tone,” Eldra clarified. “The last Twi’lek to bear the Mark of Freedom lived around a thousand years ago, and she was also the reason they became so sacred to my people. Her name was Kassandra Liber. She was a Twi’lek revolutionary who ended slavery on Ryloth.”

“Kassandra.” Maul frowned. “The name sounds familiar.”

Eldra shrugged. “She had an encounter with a Sith Lord. Her story is probably my favourite out of all of Ryloth’s history.”

“Tell me.” It wasn’t a command, just a need to know more.

She took a deep breath before beginning. “She was born a slave, but for the first twenty or so years of her life, she didn’t know it. Because she was unknowingly adopted by the Royal Family. For thousands of years, the Rylothian Royal Family and their Nobles sold their own people into slavery so they could live in luxury. When Kassandra was born, Ryloth was ruled by King Nero and Queen Minerva. And when the Queen’s second child was stillborn, one of her slaves offered up her own child as a replacement. Queen Minerva was unlike the other Royals and Nobles; she was kind to her slaves and treated them well. Because of her bereavement over the loss of her child, she accepted Kassandra as her own. She told no one of this, not even her own family, since she knew they would never accept the child. They would sooner kill her than accept a slave into their family.”

Eldra paused to collect her thoughts, then continued. “Kassandra was raised as a Princess. Like her mother, she treated her slaves well. She also grew close to her older brother, Prince Rames. The patterns on her lekku were admired by all, and one of the Nobles who liked to breed slaves for their beauty,” She shuddered as she spoke those words, “wanted to unlock the genetic code behind them. Minerva was unaware of this; perhaps if she had known, she would have stopped her husband from allowing it to happen. But when the results came back, Kassandra’s true heritage was discovered, for it was obvious that she wasn’t biologically related to the rest of her family. Nero discovered that his wife had kept this from him, so he ordered for them both to be executed. Minerva was able to ensure that Kassandra escaped, but did so at the cost of her own life. For a time, Kassandra survived in the wastelands of Ryloth on her own, always looking over her shoulder, always fearing for her life. Until one day she stumbled upon someone unexpected.”

Maul’s eyes lit up with recognition. “Darth Rathus. I remember now. This occurred during the Jedi-Sith Wars of old. He was a Twi’lek who sought to conquer his homeworld and make it part of the Great Sith Empire.”

“A Lethan Twi’lek, to be more specific. The rarest skin tone of them all,” said Eldra. “Kassandra knew of the Sith and was wary of his intentions, but Rathus was clever. He said all the right words to get her to listen to him. Though it helped that he was one of the few Sith who believed that an Empire built on the backs of slaves would never last forever, which got Kassandra’s attention. During her time in the wilderness, she became determined to overthrow the Royal Family and the Nobles, and end the enslavement of her people. But she knew she couldn’t do it alone. So, she accepted help from Rathus, took her birth father’s surname Liber, and got to work. The Ryloth Revolution had begun.” She turned to Maul. “How much of the story do you know?”

“What I told you. I also know that Rathus failed to conquer Ryloth,” said Maul.

“You missed out on the best part,” said Eldra. “See, Kassandra was willing to fight, but she was taught by her mother to always try the peaceful solution first. So, she sent Nero a warning, telling him that if he didn’t end his people’s enslavement, the fury of the Gods would rain down on him. Nero only laughed at her, because back then the Royal Family believed they were in power because it was the will of the Gods for them to be there. Kassandra then gave them one last chance by going to Rames and pleading with him. He was reluctant to hurt the girl he had believed for so long to be his blood sister, but his pride ultimately led him to siding with his father. With peace no longer an option, Kassandra turned Rathus loose on them. He stayed in the shadows, but using the Force, he unleashed on them what they thought to be “the fury of the Gods”; rivers turned red with blood, whole herds of Rycrit died without explanation, the many carnivorous species of the planet attacked without mercy or reason, swarms of insects terrorised the cities, crops failed, earthquakes shook the land, fire rained down on them… Still not sure how he managed that one…”

Maul actually looked proud of the destruction that had been caused by one of his brethren. “How can you deny the power of the dark side after that?”

“It was a different time,” said Eldra. She hated to admit that she got a sweet satisfaction from that part of the story. “A number of Jedi were forced to use the dark side in order to survive all the relentless battles against the Sith. But many fell for it.”

“Hmm,” was all Maul said in response.

“And while all this was happening, distracting the Nobles,” Eldra continued, “Kassandra was freeing as many slaves as she could. She taught them to fight, they organised themselves into an army, and then Kassandra and Rathus led them into battle against the Royal Family and the Nobles who had survived the plagues. Nero was killed by Rathus while he attempted to flee like a coward, while Kassandra defeated Rames in single combat. She couldn’t bring herself to kill him, so she locked him up. With the corrupt government overthrown, Kassandra and a number of other former slaves began to make steps towards creating a new government. They were almost hindered when the few Nobles who escaped the revolution ran to the Old Republic and lied to them, saying that Kassandra and her army were tyrannical terrorists. But when the Republic came, along with the Jedi, Kassandra convinced Rames to cooperate with her, and he spilled all of Ryloth’s dirty secrets; the corruption, the slavery, all of it. Rathus had left the planet temporarily, so the Jedi didn’t suspect the Sith’s involvement. The remaining Nobles were arrested, and the Republic unanimously voted to ban all slavery within their borders. And while this led to a brief war with the Zygerrian slave empire, and didn’t end slavery altogether, it was a huge start.”

“But Rathus had not yet attempted to conquer Ryloth,” said Maul.

Eldra sighed. “There’s a really bad holofilm about Kassandra’s story, portraying her as nothing but brainless eye-candy, playing up the tragedy of her relationship with Rathus to almost ridiculous levels, and the worst part of all, ending happily at this point right before everything went to bantha shit. Kassandra and Rathus had in fact fallen in love, but Kassandra wasn’t some lovestruck, delusional twat. She knew what kind of man he was. When he tried to convince her to join the Sith Empire, she refused. She even went as far as calling the Jedi and getting them to chase him out of the System. To make things more complicated, she found out she was pregnant with his son shortly afterwards. Unsurprisingly, the boy was Force-sensitive, and in order to protect him in case his father returned, Kassandra sent him to the Jedi for training. Lin Liber became one of the Jedi’s greatest war heroes. He was one of the few Jedi who was able to escape Coruscant with his life when the Sith conquered it. And then… the Sith attempted to conquer Ryloth. With Rathus leading the charge.”

She saw Maul clench his fist, and understood. The Battle of Ryloth had turned the tide of the war in the Jedi’s favour, and had been the beginning of the end for the Sith Empire. Of course he wouldn’t be happy to hear about it.

“Rathus and Lin met face-to-face,” Eldra continued. “But Rathus didn’t know Lin was his son. He didn’t even know he _had_ a son. So he killed him. Kassandra had reached them by that time, and she screamed when she saw her son cut down by his own father. And when she told Rathus exactly what he’d done, he was shocked. But then his anger consumed him, for in his eyes, Kassandra had not only kept him from his son, but she had also let his son be trained by the Jedi, the enemy of the Sith. He was so enraged by this development that he got sloppy, and Kassandra killed him with ease. Lin died in her arms as she wept in despair. Rames, who had fought in the battle, sat by her side and held her hand as she grieved, and in that moment, she forgave him for his wrongs.”

After letting out another steady breath, Eldra continued, “Kassandra Liber went on to become one of the most influential politicians in history. Not only did she build up Ryloth’s government from scratch, but once the Jedi-Sith War was over, she helped establish our current Galactic Republic. She got married. Not to Rames, obviously. It was to a former slave. They had many children. A lot of clans on Ryloth claim to be descended from her, but the only clan who can back up that claim with hard proof is the Syndulla clan. And since her death, no other Twi’lek has borne the Mark of Freedom. But some prophets have said that it will return when not just Ryloth, but the whole galaxy faces its greatest threat.”

Maul sat in silence for a few minutes, and Eldra could practically see his mind working; digesting the information and forming an opinion on the story.

In the end, his only response was, “Kassandra would be a good name, should our child be a girl.”

Eldra opened her mouth, ready to tell him that the name was sacred; that no self-respecting Twi’lek dared to name their child after such an important figure, and anyone who did was usually very arrogant and ended up having extremely high parental expectations that their child would never meet. But her words died when she realised that naming her child after a revolutionary who ended slavery on her homeworld would be the perfect defiance against her captivity.

It was a possibility to consider, at least.

“I’m hesitant to ask if you see the irony of that,” she said. “Seeing as our child will basically become a slave of the Sith.”

She could see the frustration in his eyes. “To be a Sith is not slavery!”

“You can never leave,” Eldra pointed out. “And you didn’t choose to become one. That’s what a slave is: being forced into servitude without their choosing, unable to leave of their own free will.”

“Why would I _want_ to leave?”

“What about me, then?” She folded her arms across her chest. “I’m a slave. I can’t leave, even though I want to. Do you think that’s fair?”

He immediately grabbed her hand, but his hold was gentle. “I don’t want you to go.” It wasn’t the malicious demand of a captor, but rather a pained plea from someone who had never experienced positive emotions before, and didn’t know how to deal with them.

Eldra was hesitant to call it “love”. Because the very idea that the Sith _could_ love anything was inconceivable. But then Rathus had loved Kassandra, only it had ended in tragedy. It was possible, but it was the selfish kind of love.

Maybe Maul _did_ love her. He just didn’t know how to act on it; he wanted to keep her with him, but didn’t understand that it would inevitably kill her and probably their child.

She just needed to help him understand that if he really cared about them, he would let them go so they could be free and safe. Eldra would bring him with her if that was what it took, and not just because it would be the only way to escape. She wanted him safe, too. The strong desire caught her off-guard, to get him safely away from black hole of toxic influence that was his master; away from a life that would only destroy him.

With a start, she realised that maybe Maul wasn’t the only one who’d fallen in love.

Since pressing on would only make him angry, Eldra decided to drop the subject for now. She needed to space out her “attacks” and keep them small; one big push would only cause him to push back harder and refuse to listen to her at all.

So instead, she said, “Kassandra is a good name.”

He nodded in agreement. “A powerful name.”

“And here I thought you were gonna choose a name like Thrash, Claw or Rage,” she teased. “Seriously, from what I’ve read, Dathomirians aren’t a very creative bunch when it comes to naming their children.”

Maul chuckled, and for a moment, the feeling of dread that hovered over them both melted away.

\---

_Eight months pregnant…_

The realisation of what he would be losing slammed into Maul one night, and he knew he would have to think of something fast.

He was on the sofa with Eldra curled up next to him, her head resting on his shoulder as she slept. Maul didn’t dare wake her up. Thanks to her now large belly, she was finding it harder and harder to get comfortable at night, thus making it harder for her to sleep. Which was, consequently, making her more irritable. He felt a deep satisfaction that one of the few places she could get comfortable was in his arms.

In front of them, the screen was still playing the… musical? Was that what they were watching? Eldra had insisted it was completely different to an opera, but the characters were still singing instead of talking, so Maul didn’t really see a difference.

It was a filmed stage production, telling the story of Kassandra Liber and her struggles. Eldra insisted it was the best version of the story, and she’d gushed about it before putting it on, telling Maul how she and her friends from the Temple had seen it live five times, how the decision to film it and release it on the HoloNet made it easier and cheaper to watch…

She ended up falling asleep sometime after the Revolution ended. Maul figured it was the pregnancy making her overly tired.

Still, he continued to watch, because it was important to Eldra. It wasn’t until the story reached the Battle of Ryloth that he started feeling… things.

_“I did what I had to do to protect him!”_

The words of Kassandra Liber… They felt like an echo of something that hadn’t happened yet. It was like the Force was trying to tell him something, but whatever it was slipped away before Maul could properly grasp it. He instinctively placed his hand on Eldra’s expanded belly, and it was in that moment he imagined his master arriving out of the blue and taking both Eldra and the baby from him.

And he realised that he could never let Sidious rip them from his arms.

He was loyal to his master, but then his master also encouraged defiance. At least, he encouraged the _right_ kind of defiance; the kind that wouldn’t disrupt and/or interfere with his plans. And if he had plans for the child…

Maul would just have to think of something. A compromise that would satisfy both Sidious and himself. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to know what the Mark of Freedom looks like, just type 'simple swirl pattern' into Google images and the results should give you a rough idea.


	13. Chapter Twelve: Two Hearts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to say a big thanks to my beta, Artemisarrow! Without her, this story wouldn't be the way it is now.

When you came into the world,

you cried and it broke my heart

– “Dear Theodosia”, _Hamilton on Broadway_

\---

_Nine months pregnant…_

The baby was due any day.

Nesting urges had overtaken Eldra, which was fine with her. They provided her with enough of a distraction to break the cycle of her emotions: one moment she was excited that she would soon be holding her child in her arms, and then the next moment she would be filled with dread at the knowledge that she wouldn’t be holding her child for very long before he or she would be ripped from her arms.

It was an impossible solution, but she wanted to keep her child in her belly forever. At least then he or she would be safe from harm. By bringing her child into the world, Eldra would only be handing them over to a man who wanted to turn them into a living weapon – like their father.

Speaking of the Sith, Maul had been quiet as of late. It wasn’t unusual in itself, but considering he’d spent most of her pregnancy trying to reconnect with her while she gave him the cold shoulder, suddenly backstepping appeared strange.

She wondered if he was filled with dread, too. Was he thinking over everything she’d been trying to tell him? Was he considering his options? Had he finally realised that the power of the Sith wasn’t worth having if he lost her and the child in exchange for it? If he was having doubts, he wasn’t voicing them.

Eldra sighed as she pushed the broom across the floor, sweeping the dirt into a corner. She hated that the fate of herself and the child rested in someone else’s hands.

“Keep sweeping.”

“Sure, let the pregnant lady do all the work,” she teased the droid.

Venny was sitting on the sofa, catching up on his latest holodrama. “In case you cannot recall, you were the one who insisted upon doing all the work. And when I attempted to help, you forced me away. Literally.”

“I know. I was teasing you.” Eldra shook her head and continued sweeping. She _had_ gone a little insane with the cleaning lately. She’d dusted, reorganised and alphabetised stuff in the cupboards, paired loose socks ( _Maul had socks!_ It was both odd and hilarious, firstly that a Sith Lord would own such harmless things, and secondly because it stupidly _made sense_ ; it wasn’t like his feet would be bare under his boots), cleaned her refresher until it was sparkling, taken over laundry duty…

Right after she finished sweeping, Maul emerged from the kitchen with a cup of tea in his hands. “Eldra, you need to rest.”

“I suppose I could take a break,” she said with a shrug, before sitting herself down next to Venny on the sofa. Maul handed her the cup, and the tea that passed her lips wasn’t hot enough to be scorching but also wasn’t cold enough to be disgusting. She sent Maul a smile of thanks, and he smiled in return.

The fact that Maul was showing concern – or at least, as much as he was able to – for both her and the child helped her situation somewhat. The bond was still there, even if it had taken a battering. It was still twisted. It was still unhealthy. But it kept her sane.

Eldra had just finished her tea and set her cup down on the table when she felt her abdomen tighten in a way she’d never felt before, startling her. She sucked in a breath and her hands went to her belly, rubbing it until the feeling went away.

Maul was instantly by her side. “What happened?” he asked. “Was it a kick?” Since she’d let him back in again, he’d been almost obsessed with feeling their baby’s kicks. (Which honestly made too much sense, and all things considered it really wasn’t something she wanted to think too hard about, so she just focussed on the sweeter side of it.)

“No.” She shook her head. “It could be the tea disagreeing with me. It does that sometimes. I just need to walk it off.”

Getting to her feet was an effort, but she managed it despite Maul hovering over her. She silently held up her hand, signalling for him not to follow, before she made her way to her quarters. As she walked away, she tried not to let her panic show. What she’d told him was a lie, but she couldn’t bear to face the truth. Eldra knew exactly what the feeling was: a contraction.

Two years to the day after she’d been taken by the Sith, nineteen-year-old Eldra Kaitis was going into labour.

But she didn’t want to accept it. Because that meant she was just one step closer to losing her child. One step closer to looking death in the eye.

Another contraction came when she was brushing her teeth, twenty minutes after the first. While the pain was still manageable, it hurt slightly more than the first. And if what she’d read was true, each contraction would grow more painful than the one before, and last longer. She wanted to ignore them and carry on with her life, but now it was impossible. Her baby was coming, and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

Eldra could no longer hold back her tears. She wept silently as her hands stroked her expanded belly.

“I’m sorry, little one. I’m so sorry.”

\---

Maul felt her shooting pain through the bond, and instantly sprinted towards Eldra’s quarters. He managed to supress the urge to rip through the apartment’s very walls in order to get to her faster, but only just.

“Eldra!” Upon arriving in her quarters, he found her standing in the refresher, her face twisted with pain. Her trousers were soaking wet, and Maul had paid enough attention to the droid’s various information dumps over the past several months to know that it meant Eldra’s water had broken.

Their baby was coming.

A grin threatened to split Maul’s face, but he pushed it down. The child hadn’t been born yet, and Eldra was in pain.

She looked at him, her eyes pleading. “Help…”

“Droid! Get in here now!” Maul called over his shoulder. The young Sith then took Eldra’s hand and gently guided her back into her bedroom. She was trembling, her eyes wide and her face pale. At first Maul wondered why she wasn’t excited that their baby was about to be born, before the realisation hit him like a ship travelling at lightspeed: his master would come and collect the child, and Eldra would be dead.

He knew that he couldn’t let Sidious take the child away. But at the same time, he was hesitant to act against his master’s wishes.

The droid didn’t enter the room until Eldra was lying on the bed. It scanned her belly with a small device and looked at the results. “She has gone into labour.”

Maul clenched his fists, but Eldra beat him to voicing their joint frustrations. “Really, Venny? I hadn’t noticed!”

“Contractions are fifteen minutes apart,” the droid continued without acknowledging either of them. “It should be several hours before her cervix is fully dilated. So far, there are no signs of complications.”

“You had better be right, droid.” Maul stepped closer to the droid. “If anything happens to either of them, I will tear you apart and incinerate you. There won’t even be any scrap left of you to salvage.”

The droid didn’t flinch. “I shall keep that in mind, but there is no need to worry. Statistics show that the chances of a woman on Coruscant dying in childbirth are extremely low. In the last one hundred years, only one woman has died under such circumstances, and only because she received another injury unrelated to childbirth…”

It continued talking about the statistics, but Maul tuned it out. If the chances of anything going wrong were extremely low, he should be able to relax. But in truth, he couldn’t. All he could think about was what if Eldra became part of that statistic? What if something went wrong? He had programmed the droid with vital knowledge of the birthing process, but it wasn’t a medical droid. There was only so much it could do.

What if there were complications, and the only way to save both Eldra and the child was to take them to a hospital? There was no doubt that Eldra was officially registered as a missing person (if not presumed dead), and the hospital would have access to those data banks, meaning that the Jedi would get involved and find Eldra and the child and take them away…

No. That couldn’t happen. He wouldn’t let it.

_Yet you’re willing to let Lord Sidious take them both away_ , a voice in his head whispered. Maul wanted to ignore it and tell himself that was different, because Sidious was his master and not a Jedi, but found that he couldn’t.

Because it didn’t matter either way. Whether it was the Jedi taking them or Sidious taking them, Eldra and the child would still be gone.

Another spike of pain shot through the bond, and Maul hurried back over to Eldra. She was breathing deeply, holding her belly and clenching her teeth. Sweat had appeared on her brow, and Maul reached out to gently wipe it away.

When the contraction passed, Eldra’s head fell back onto the pillow and she resumed trembling. Maul could sense her fear, far greater than it had ever been. He hated it; hated that she was in pain, and hated that he couldn’t do anything about it. Why did he have to feel so helpless?

And that helplessness grew when his commlink beeped.

His master was summoning him. No doubt he had sensed that the child was on the way.

Maul was about to pull his hand away and reach for his commlink when Eldra suddenly grabbed it. Her eyes met his, and the sheer terror in them was heart-breaking.

“Please…” she begged him. “Don’t… don’t let him take… Please…”

She screwed her eyes shut and turned away, letting go of his hand.

The droid reappeared by her side and was talking, saying something about the birthing process, but Maul didn’t hear it. All he could hear was Eldra, her words echoing in his mind, telling him over and over what his hearts were telling him as well…

His mind was like a storm, one he couldn’t escape.

He hurried out of Eldra’s quarters and into the main apartment. Taking a seat on the sofa, he let himself think. To be a Sith was his destiny, and his master was the key to unlocking his true potential. The power he could wield was unimaginable, and he had to stay. And if he was staying, then Eldra and their child needed to stay, too. There was no question about it.

But his mind and his hearts were screaming at him not to let Sidious take the child.

The child was _his_ , not his master’s. Therefore, it was his responsibility to train the child; to teach his son or daughter the ways of the Force. And the child would need more than one opponent to train against, so keeping Eldra was necessary.

He hoped Sidious saw it that way, too.

The plan formed in his mind as he drove the speeder into the Works. He couldn’t help but grow fearful of how his master would respond, but he took that fear and used it to fuel his determination. He _needed_ to do this. He refused to live out the rest of his days without Eldra and their child by his side.

He met his master in the same hanger bay as always. Darth Sidious was already there, as always. Maul knelt before him, as always. The routine was engraved in him, but this time, Maul would be the one making the plan.

“I felt a great disturbance in the Force,” said Sidious. “I suppose that means the child will soon be among us. The Jedi do not suspect a thing. I have made sure of it.”

Maul took a deep breath. It was now or never. “Master, I know you wished to oversee her training yourself. But I have a suggestion.”

“Oh?” He sounded intrigued.

“Your plans must come first,” Maul continued. “They are far more important than the child, and you must give them your undivided attention. You said that the blockade of Naboo will not occur for another three years. Allow me to oversee the first years of the child’s training, so you will not be distracted from our true goal.”

Sidious was silent for a few moments. “I hope you do not mean to train this child as your own apprentice, with the intention of supplanting me.”

“Why would I kill you when there is still so much more to learn, my master? And this is only a temporary arrangement, until you have more time to spare.”

There was silence as Sidious considered his words.

“I will allow this, my apprentice,” he finally said. Maul hid his relief. “Do you also wish to keep the Padawan alive?”

“For training purposes,” said Maul. “For both myself and the child.”

“Very well,” said Sidious. “But remember that I can order you to kill the Padawan at any time. And remember that when I am ready, I will take the child and begin to train it myself. Is that clear?”

“Yes, my master.”

But it bought him some time to think of a more permanent solution.

It was hard to obey Coruscant’s traffic laws as he sped back to the apartment. He could feel Eldra’s pain increasing through the bond; he’d managed to ignore it while meeting with his master, but now that he was alone…

He guided his speeder to the landing platform outside of his apartment. The second it touched down, Maul leapt off of it and sprinted across the walkway. With Eldra closer, he could feel her pain more strongly, but he could also feel her determination. She was building up to something, pushing something with all of her might…

Just as Maul entered the apartment, he heard a baby’s cry.

He stopped dead.

The shift in the Force almost unbalanced him. He hoped that the precautions his master had taken to ensure the Sith would never be detected held strong, or else it wouldn’t be long before the Jedi came to investigate. The child’s Force-presence was… strange. It was neither light nor dark; it was somewhere in between. Which, given her parentage, made a lot of sense.

But her raw potential was strong, if untapped.

After a few minutes, the baby’s cries stopped. Though he was desperate to see them both, Maul decided to wait in the main apartment until the droid had finished with the birthing process. He didn’t want to get in the way, and he wanted the droid gone so he could be alone with Eldra and the child. For now, sensing that they were safe was enough to satisfy him.

Eventually, the droid left Eldra’s quarters. It looked surprised upon seeing him. “Master Maul, I see that you have returned.”

“How is she?” Maul asked immediately. “Is Eldra fine? What of the child?”

“Your Jedi has suffered no ill effects from the birthing process, and the child is healthy,” said the droid. “I am continuing to monitor their heartbeats should any complications arise. For now, all three are steady.”

“Three?”

“The child has two hearts, as you do. While she has a mostly Twi’lek exterior, her interior is Zabrak from what I can decipher. Further scans are needed to know for sure.”

“She?”

“Yes. The child is a girl.”

A girl. He had a daughter, who was healthy, and Eldra was safe. Nothing else mattered to him. “Can I see them?”

The droid appeared surprised that he was asking. “I cannot stop you.” It passed him and left to tend to other matters, leaving Maul to go alone to Eldra’s quarters. He took a moment to compose himself before he entered, and he paused in the doorway at the sight before him.

Eldra was sat upright in bed, cradling the baby in her arms. The child looked so… small. From across the room, and with the baby wrapped in a blanket, he couldn’t make out much else other than her skin tone, which matched her mother’s.

The Twi’lek woman was singing a lullaby in her native language, her voice soft and soothing. She trailed off when she looked up at him, and her expression hardened. “If you’ve come here to take her, know that I’ll die before you do.”

She had been defiant in his face before, many times, and yet she’d never looked so deadly. His fondness for her increased tenfold, and he allowed himself to imagine what she would be like as a Sith. For some reason, she wasn’t as appealing as she was now, as a Jedi. He shouldn’t prefer her as a warrior of light instead of a solider of darkness, but he had grown addicted to touching her light.

“I just want to see her,” he said.

Eldra maintained her hardened expression for a few moments longer before it softened. “Fine. Come here.”

Maul crossed the room to stand by her side, allowing him a closer look at his newborn daughter. She was the spitting image of her mother in all but two ways: she had Zabrak ears instead of the coned Twi’lek ones, and there were three little stumps on the top of her forehead where horns would soon grow.

“Her name?” Maul asked.

“Kassandra.”

“I said it was a powerful name.”

“That’s not why I chose it.” Eldra moved her hand and pointed to where the baby’s lekku were only just starting to form. Maul wasn’t sure what she was trying to show him, but upon squinting and leaning closer, he was able to make it out.

The beginnings of a swirl.

The Twi’lek Mark of Freedom. It was faded, but unmistakable.

“What does this mean?” he found himself saying.

Eldra met his gaze, and there was the defiance again. “It means she will be free.”

Maul wanted to tell her that their child was already free, but knew that the day of their daughter’s birth was not the time to start an argument.

“Would you like to hold her?”

Maul blinked, surprised at the trust Eldra was showing despite her initial hostility towards him. “I…” He looked back to Kassandra. She was still so small, looked so breakable, and he wasn’t even sure he could hold her without hurting her in some way…

But Eldra was holding her out to him, and he had no choice but to accept her into his arms. She made a noise at being moved, but didn’t start crying, which Maul took as a good sign. At least she didn’t hate him.

He found that he wouldn’t have been surprised if she did.

Holding her close… It was doing something to him, something he couldn’t put a name to. Whatever it was, it gave him the undeniable urge to kill anyone who would try to tear her out of his arms (unless that person was Eldra, of course). It frightened him, that such a small person who wasn’t even an hour old could ignite such feelings within him. She was definitely her mother’s daughter.

_Kassandra_. She was… perfect.

He frowned. How could he already know she was perfect when she’d only been born?

Using the back of his finger, he gently stroked the baby’s cheek. Her eyes opened for a brief moment, revealing that they were blue like Eldra’s.

A hand gripped his arm, and Maul found himself looking into those same blue eyes, only older and filled with a deep fear he suddenly found himself understanding.

“How much time do we have before I have to fight you?”

“Three years.” At her surprised look, he explained, “My master’s plan is in a delicate stage right now that requires his full attention. I simply reminded him of this, and pointed out that trying to train a child at the same time would be difficult. He agreed, and has allowed me to oversee her training for the time being. He has also allowed me to keep you alive.”

She stared at him in shock. “Why?”

“Because she is my daughter. Mine. Not his. I should be the one to train her.”

This answer seemed to satisfy her, and the tension that had haunted her body ever since discovering her pregnancy left her in one smooth motion. It was clear from the emotions he was picking up from her that she expected more; wanted something from him that he could never give. But for now, what he had done to keep their daughter with them, even if temporarily, was enough.

“Thank you.”

\---

Sidious knew his apprentice was stalling.

There was no desire in him to train his child as an apprentice; no desire to supplant him. He simply wanted to keep his daughter under the belief that she was _his_ to possess, and no one else should have her. He felt the same way about the Padawan.

Maul’s talk about giving his master time to focus on their plans was only that: talk. It was not the real reason he suggested the arrangement, just an excuse. But that didn’t make it any less true. Sidious knew that attempting to train a child while putting his plans into motion would be difficult. And if the blockade and subsequent invasion of Naboo failed because his concentration was divided, it would take many more years to set up another crisis that would allow him to take control of the Senate.

So, Sidious humoured his apprentice and allowed him to take care of the child’s training. Not only would it keep the child out of his way, but it would allow him to teach his apprentice a valuable lesson in the ways of the Sith.

There was no room for family. And snatching his child away while also ordering him to kill his lover would drive Darth Maul even deeper into the dark.


	14. Chapter Thirteen: Hope is All We Have

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The ending scene in the training room was inspired by a similar scene in sunalso's Buffy fic 'Hunger'.

Just a child who cannot know

that danger follows where I go

– “Suddenly”, _Hugh Jackman_

\---

Eldra stirred from her sleep at the sound of crying.

The first thing she saw when her eyes opened was the holoclock on her bedside table. It took a few moments for her to process what time it was, and when she did, she sighed. Not much time had passed since Kassandra had been fed, and she’d only changed her daughter’s diaper around twenty minutes ago. Which meant that Kassandra was just being fussy.

Another presence entered the room, and her daughter immediately stopped crying.

Unable to keep from smiling, Eldra turned over and said, “That confirms it. You’re not sleeping, are you?”

Maul was gently rocking Kassandra in his arms, stroking her little head with two fingers in an attempt to sooth her. It wasn’t the first time Eldra had woken up to her daughter’s tears, only to find that Maul had beaten her to it.

The Zabrak was emitting a low purr, and Eldra had learnt not to draw attention to it. She loved the sound too much for him to stop out of embarrassment.

“I can function on little sleep,” he said, and he didn’t need to tell her how he had grown used to that. She could make a pretty good guess as to why, and it definitely involved his master. “Rest, Eldra. You need it more than I do.”

She raised an eyebrow in his direction. “Funny how you never show up when she needs her diaper changing.”

The young Sith wrinkled his nose. “I have standards.”

“I wanna be mad, but I honestly don’t blame you.” Eldra shrugged. “I swear her last diaper contained the origins of the dark side.”

They shared a chuckle before they were content to stay in silence, Maul comforting their daughter while Eldra watched. Her gaze shifted between Kassandra and the tenderness in Maul’s eyes as he beheld the creation they’d made together.

It had become increasingly obvious since the birth two weeks ago that the Sith apprentice cared for his daughter. He only showed it in subtle ways; there was no cooing, nor were there playful games of peekaboo or anything else of the kind, but that was expected given the type of person he was.

She could tell he was bewildered by his own feelings, sometimes overwhelmed by them, but she couldn’t deny what she saw. The emotion in his eyes whenever he looked at Kassandra… It confirmed in Eldra’s heart that there was a little bit of good in him. Covered in darkness, but there, and knowing this made it easier for Eldra to get through every passing day.

But she never forgot that he could do more; that he could let them go so they were away from his master, or even come with them. And while she told herself that he had to take baby steps, she feared that so long as he was under the influence of the Sith, he would never let them go.

It didn’t take very long for Kassandra to drift back off to sleep in her father’s arms. Though it was clear that Maul was tempted to continue holding her, Eldra had told him that their child needed to learn to sleep in her crib. So, he gently laid her down, before he placed his daughter’s grey cuddly wolf next to her, which Kassandra latched onto immediately.

(The first time Eldra had seen him holding the toy, she’d forced herself out of the room so as not to wake their daughter up, and laughed hysterically at the sight of a Sith Lord holding a cute little cuddly toy.)

Eldra settled back down in her bed and muttered a tired, “Goodnight” in Maul’s direction. It took her a few moments to realise that Maul hadn’t left the room, so she opened her eyes again and found him staring at her.

“You know, watching people sleep is creepy,” she told him.

He opened his mouth, then closed it. His fingers started fidgeting and he looked down at them. “I… It won’t be long before she wakes up again, so…”

She rolled her eyes when she realised what he was asking, but it was with a smile. “Come on, then.” She patted the bed beside her.

The wave of happiness she sensed from him almost caught her off-guard. (And Sith Lords shouldn’t be this endearing, what was even her life anymore?) Maul quickly laid down beside her, and his arm immediately snaked around her waist and pulled her against him. He began purring again.

Eldra instinctively relaxed; she’d long accepted that his presence comforted her.

“No funny business,” she told him. “Not only can we _not_ do that with Kassie in the room, but Venny said I can’t go back to any kind of physical activity until six to eight weeks after the birth.”

“You should know by now that this… bond between us goes beyond the physical.”

Eldra didn’t respond, because she _did_ know. And it hurt all the more, knowing that she needed to be prepared to fight to the death at any time to protect her child; knowing that she might have to one day kill Maul if that was what it took.

The feelings of loss and devastation that came with the thought of killing Maul scared her. Because she wasn’t supposed to feel that way about her enemy. The bond wasn’t supposed to go that deep.

It couldn’t be helped now. Finding herself living beyond the time limit she thought she’d had, Eldra treasured the time she spent with her family, knowing that it could come to an end at any moment. But before a certain physical activity could resume, she needed to take care of something.

“I looked into birth control,” she said suddenly. There was really no right way of broaching the subject, so she figured that coming right out and saying it was the best approach. “I don’t regret having Kassie, but I don’t think I could go through that again. Trying to keep myself calm and happy in the face of something I thought would be inevitable… It drained me.”

His fingers started stroking the back of her neck. “I understand.”

Eldra let out the breath she hadn’t realised she’d been holding. And a little bit of her began to hope. If Maul understood how much she’d struggled during her pregnancy, surely that meant he understood just how dire their situation was?

They had only three years before he would once again be faced with the same choice: to save his family or serve his master.

All she had to do was convince him to make the right one.

\---

Maul was watching over Kassandra when his commlink beeped, startling him.

He was hit by a wave of dread. It had been six weeks since his daughter’s birth, and his master hadn’t contacted him once. This in itself wasn’t unusual; he could sometimes go for months without hearing from his master. And it could just be a regular update, or Sidious could have a mission for him…

But Maul couldn’t shake the fear of what his master could demand. Though he had agreed to let his apprentice train the child, he could change his mind at any time.

And if that happened, Maul didn’t know what he would do.

Looking at his commlink, Maul realised that it wasn’t a summoning. Sidious only wanted to speak to him over the comm. Maul looked back over to his daughter; she was lying on a matt on the floor, beneath an arch full of toys hanging down. His pup was staring up at them in awe, and making noises like she was trying to communicate with them.

Satisfied that she wasn’t going anywhere, Maul shifted in his seat so his back was turned, and answered the comm. “I am here, Master.”

“ _Negotiations with the Trade Federation will take up much of my time_ ,” said Sidious. “ _I may be out of contact for many months._ ”

Maul didn’t understand why, but hearing this relieved him. “I understand, Master.”

“ _All I ask of you_ ,” Sidious continued, “ _is that when you begin training the child, record your progress on a Holocron and send it to me_.”

His relief was short lived. Maul should have known that things wouldn’t be so easy; that his master wouldn’t let him train Kassandra unsupervised.

He knew what his master required of him. He knew that the sort of training he himself had received would be the training Sidious expected him to provide for Kassandra. And the very thought of doing anything of the sort to his pup made him sick to his stomach. Besides, she was _his_ daughter. He would train her his _own_ way.

How to justify that to his master was another matter.

But he had time to think of something. Kassandra was much too young to begin her training. “Yes, my master,” was all he said, and the connection ended.

Maul turned back to Kassandra, who was waving her hands around and trying to grab the toys above her. She seemed especially fixated on the wolf that was hanging from the centre of the arch. Maul smiled; it appeared his daughter already had a favourite animal.

From the hallway, Eldra emerged with the droid behind her. She smiled down at her daughter, but left the child to her own devices and sat down next to Maul, while the droid continued into the kitchen. “Well, that’s all taken care of. Venny said I should wait another week or two before we resume… certain activities, so the birth control has time to kick in.”

“What about sparring?” Maul asked.

“Don’t worry. I plan on thoroughly kicking your butt later today.” She smirked.

He tried to mirror her expression, but wasn’t feeling it. While he was excited to get back to sparring with her again, his mood was still dampened by what his master had ordered him to do. And thanks to their bond that was ever increasing in strength, Eldra noticed almost immediately that something was up.

“It’s nothing,” he told her, before she could even open her mouth to ask.

Eldra looked down at Kassandra before turning back to Maul. “If it’s your own business, then I won’t pester you about it. But I have a right to know if it concerns Kassie.”

Maul sighed. She was right. “My master wishes for me to record her training on a Holocron, so that he may keep up with her progress.”

The Twi’lek’s face turned hard. “If you mean to give her the same sort of “training” that your master gave you-”

“No.”

She blinked, surprised. “Then how will you be training her?”

“I will train her to use her emotions,” he said.

Eldra scoffed. “Because teaching a toddler to use her anger sounds like a _great_ idea!”

“You didn’t have a problem with this before.”

“I’d take _you_ training her over your master any day,” she explained. “And teaching her to, I don’t know, lift building blocks with the Force is one thing. But teaching her to be angry all the time because it’s the only way she can get things done is unhealthy and a one-way ticket to the dark side! I’m not having you corrupt her!”

Maul bared his teeth at her. “Then how do you wish for me to train her? As a Jedi? Because that’s what it sounds like!”

“Even _normal_ children are taught not to give into their anger!”

Their voices had gradually been increasing in volume, but they didn’t realise it until Kassandra started to cry. Maul immediately hurried over to her and scooped her up into his arms. He rocked her and stroked her head, trying to soothe his pup and ignoring how every time she cried, it felt like he was being stabbed in one of his hearts.

It wasn’t until she’d stopped crying that he turned back to Eldra. All of her anger had evaporated, and she was watching them both warmly. Maul himself found it hard to stay mad at her when he noticed her thumb slowly rubbing the red garnet she still wore around her neck.

Maul sat back down again, their daughter still in his arms. He knew that Eldra was only concerned about their pup, but he refused to let her Jedi sensibilities get in the way of raising Kassandra. Nevertheless, arguing about it would get them nowhere.

Wanting to change the subject, he said, “Since we can begin sparring again, may I suggest we try forms of hand-to-hand combat? Are you familiar with Teräs Käsi?”

“Yes.” She nodded. “It’s taught at the Temple, but only if you wished to learn it. I was more interested in mastering as many forms of lightsaber combat as I could, so I never learned. I only learned the more basic levels of hand-to-hand combat.”

The thought of her being vulnerable without a weapon struck Maul with a spike of fear. That would never do. “Then I will teach it to you. How much do you know about it?”

“It was created to combat Jedi,” she said. “Siri and I would sometimes watch Joclad Danva and Anoon Bondara sparring, so I’m familiar with a few of the moves.”

“Good.” Maul nodded, mostly to himself. “If the droid can watch over Kassandra this afternoon, we shall begin your training today.”

He would make certain that she could defend herself against any and all opponents. And one day, he would give their pup that same training, ensuring that she could protect herself when he wasn’t around to do so.

\---

Eldra didn’t know why she’d ever turned down learning Teräs Käsi back at the Temple. She took to it like a Mon Calamari took to water, and four months after Maul had started training her, she was giving him a worthy challenge.

Eldra threw a punch at Maul’s face, which he dodged with ease before throwing a counter punch. They both wore huge grins, and Eldra almost laughed when she realised how much fun she was having. It had been easy to forget, after months of pregnancy, how much she’d relied on training to provide her with a distraction from her worries.

And whenever she thought she was having too much fun, she would just remind herself that the training allowed her to prepare for the fight she knew would one day come. She had no idea if she’d be able to defeat the Sith master, but she had to try.

At least the training sessions had given her hope that Maul wouldn’t be torturing their daughter into compliance. But on the other hand, there were still moments that worried her, like whenever he gave their daughter what she wanted when she angrily demanded it with screams and tears. It reminded Eldra that Maul didn’t know any better. He’d had a terrifying upbringing; had been groomed by a Sith Lord to become the perfect weapon. It was understandable that he wouldn’t know any other way to raise a child. But she realised that she couldn’t use it as an excuse, and she certainly couldn’t let him do the same to their own daughter.

But there were times when he got things right.

They traded blows before Eldra jumped and attempted to land a kick on his shoulder, but Maul grabbed her foot and sent her to the floor. She kicked against his grip, forcing him to let go, before rolling into a stand and rushing him again. Staying low to avoid his punches, Eldra managed to dive behind him and grab his arm, before she flipped him over her head.

Laughter filled the training room.

Eldra glanced over at the special seat Kassandra was strapped into, and smiled. Their five-month-old daughter was enthralled by the fight, not even the slightest bit afraid of the loud noises and the sudden, violent movements. Perhaps because it was her parents fighting. Eldra made a note to let Kassandra watch them more often, at least whenever they sparred without lightsabers. Venny usually watched her whenever they trained, but he’d had other matters to attend to that particular day.

Realising what her daughter was laughing at, Eldra smirked down at Maul. “Looks like she’s on my team.”

“Only because you’re the one who gives her food,” said Maul, smirking back at her. “And you know what they say: don’t bite the hand that feeds you.”

Eldra straddled him. “Then you should feed her more often.”

“I don’t exactly have the right equipment for it.” He nodded to her breasts.

She rolled her eyes. “We have bottles. And I don’t think that’s why she’s routing for me.”

“Oh? Do enlighten me.”

Her smirk widened. “It’s because I’m better than you.”

Maul growled, but it was playful – he was actually being _playful?_ – before he managed to encircle his arms around her and flip their positions, so he was the one straddling her. Eldra just grinned and kicked him off, sending him sliding across the floor.

Kassandra laughed again.

“See?” Eldra nodded towards their daughter.

There was no frustration in Maul’s expression when he jumped to his feet. He actually looked giddy, if that was even possible. “I’ll soon tempt her to my side.”

“Good luck.”

The fight began again. When it became clear that Kassandra only laughed when it was her father getting tossed about, it didn’t take long for Eldra to realise that Maul was letting her throw him around a lot more than he normally would. Purely to make their daughter laugh.

Eldra made a note to kiss the life out of him when their training session was over. 


	15. Chapter Fourteen: Waiting in Sorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shout-out to Artemisarrow, the best beta in the galaxy.

You’ll be alright,

no one can hurt you now

– “Safe and Sound”, _Taylor Swift (feat. The Civil Wars)_

\---

“Come on, Kassie. Come to Mama.”

Maul watched with bated breath as Kassandra turned towards her mother. The one-year-old was standing on her feet, gripping the sofa, potentially moments away from taking her first steps. She seemed to consider it, before letting herself fall back on her rear, turning over and crawling instead.

Eldra sighed, but kept smiling at the little girl as she held out her arms, ready to welcome her. Since Kassandra wasn’t looking at him, Maul let himself roll his eyes. “Why won’t she do it?”

“Let her walk in her own time,” said Eldra, as she pulled her daughter into her lap. “She’s more likely to fail if you hurry her.”

“Perhaps she needs more motivation.” Maul didn’t move from his position on the sofa and reached towards his pup’s wolf toy that was lying on the floor. He lifted it with the Force before throwing it across the room. “Have her fetch it.”

“If you insist.” Eldra placed Kassandra onto her feet and pointed at the toy. “Go on, Kassie! Go and get Wolfie!”

Kassandra’s gaze followed her mother’s finger and landed on the toy wolf. She babbled in response, but didn’t move her feet. Instead she reached out her hand, and the toy began to float slowly towards her, wobbling from lack of skill. She laughed when the toy was in her arms.

Eldra raised an amused eyebrow at Maul.

He sighed, but couldn’t find it in him to be annoyed. His little pup was already strong with the Force, and he couldn’t be prouder. “I encouraged her to use the Force. You merely encouraged her to crawl.”

“Ha-ha, very funny, but we’re trying to get her to _walk_ , remember?” she reminded him.

“You’re the one who was “advanced” ahead by your Jedi,” said Maul. “Just apply the same methods. With as little Jedi platitudes as possible, if you don’t mind.”

Eldra rolled her eyes. “That’s not what I meant when I said that. I was moved into a higher Clan because of my advanced skills in the Force for my age, not because I was able to walk before everyone else. I don’t even _know_ if I did or not; I can’t remember that far back. But anyway, Obi-Wan and the others were three years older than me – except for Siri, who’s only a year older than me. She was moved up, too, mostly for the same reasons but also because she got into a fight with Bruck Chun and kicked him in the choobies…”

She started rambling, a habit she’d developed recently whenever she started talking about her old life. When she’d first started doing it, Maul had thought he would feel anger towards even a single mention of the Jedi, as had been the case when he’d first met Eldra. But instead of igniting the fires of rage within him, Maul soon realised that those flames had… dimmed.

His anger towards the Jedi was still there, as was his desire to kill them, but it wasn’t as strong as it had once been. It didn’t take him long to figure out that the strength of his anger had waned since meeting Eldra, and even more so since Kassandra’s birth.

Yet he couldn’t bring himself to hate either of them.

But that wasn’t the only reason, he supposed. He’d come to see that he had no personal motive for hating the Jedi. He only hated them because his master told him to; because his master had shown him what the Jedi had done to the Sith that had come before them. The vision he’d experienced on Malachor – feeling hundreds upon hundreds of Sith being struck down without mercy – had installed in him a sense of vengeance, but it wasn’t his own. That thirst for revenge belonged to the Sith who had died over a thousand years ago.

“Maul, look!”

The young Sith retreated from his thoughts and looked back over at Kassandra. She was on her feet again, staring at him with a big grin on her face. The noises coming out of her mouth were not words, and yet Maul knew she was trying to communicate with him.

Then, she stepped forwards. Paused. And took another step.

She was wobbly, but determined. Neither Maul nor Eldra dared to say a word, not until Kassandra reached her father and extended her arms out to him. He slid off the sofa and embraced his pup, pride overwhelming him.

Deep in his mind, a voice that sounded like Eldra whispered that this was all he needed; he could take his family and run, far away from the Sith and the Jedi and live peacefully on a different planet. There would never be a risk of his daughter being taken by Sidious, he would never have to face the order to kill the woman he…

Maul pushed the voice away. He was the apprentice of the most powerful being in the galaxy. And what was more, he had been chosen to fulfil an important destiny; to destroy the Jedi and restore the Sith Empire. It was what he’d been preparing for his whole life, and he could only do this alongside Sidious. He couldn’t throw this away.

He had to remain by his master’s side. Eldra didn’t understand just how important this was to him; she would probably _never_ understand. But he hoped that one day she would at least understand why she and their daughter needed to stay with him.

A life without them was one he couldn’t face.

\---

“Your offspring is nothing but trouble.”

Eldra held back her laughter as she put her dirty bowl and spoon into the sink, ready to be washed up. “I offered to clean up after her, Venny, but you refused.”

The droid shooed her away and turned on the tap. “You have no idea how to clean properly, and you cannot even put the cleaning products back where they are supposed to go! No, no. Leave the cleaning to me. But please tell me organic offspring grow out of this messy phase.”

“Eventually. After several years.” She left the kitchen before Venny could voice his displeasure at this timescale.

In the main apartment area, the screen was switched onto the Sports Channel. The Galactic Games had begun, this year being held on Onderon. And since the Opening Ceremony a few days before, Eldra had been glued to her seat. It had become a tradition to watch the games with Obi-Wan, Siri and the rest of their Clan, in between their missions and Temple studies.

She wondered if they were all watching right now.

The commentators on the screen were talking about the Fathier race that was about to start. Eldra had heard it all before, so she instead turned her attention to Kassandra, who was sat on the floor surrounded by building blocks. She was lifting them using the Force, the blocks wobbling in mid-air, before she placed them on top of each other to create a tower. Eldra smiled at her daughter’s progress.

Maul was sitting next to the child, recording the display onto a Holocron.

Eldra hated that he needed to do this, but she kept telling herself that it was better than the alternative, which was the Sith master coming to take their daughter away. Still, the very thought of that… _monster_ watching Kassandra even via Holocron fed her urge to track him down and tear him to pieces (an urge that was pretty strong already). And it was a constant reminder that their family wasn’t going to stay whole forever.

She had traded one waiting game for another.

And Maul still wasn’t listening to her. She reached up to fiddle with the red garnet hanging around her neck, something she always did instinctively when contemplating the conflicting feelings she held for the young Sith. Sometimes she could strangle him for being so stubborn, but hated the thought of hurting him ( _seriously_ hurting him; their sparring sessions didn’t count).

It wasn’t all that worried her.

Maul finished the recording and got to his feet, leaving Kassandra with her bricks. He noticed Eldra and must have seen the warring emotions on her face, because he crossed over to her with a worried expression. “Eldra?”

“Kassie still hasn’t said her first word,” Eldra told him. She nodded back to their daughter, who had stopped playing with the bricks and was instead watching the Fathiers racing on the screen. “She’s over a year old, and while she’s babbling, she should be saying a few basic words by now.”

“Then she’s a late talker,” said Maul. “Experts on the HoloNet said that could happen.”

“Those same experts also said a child shouldn’t be trapped inside all day, every day, especially inside the same four walls.” Eldra gestured to the apartment. She could see the annoyance building in Maul’s eyes, but she didn’t stop. “Kassie needs fresh air – which granted, is in short supply on Coruscant anyway, but still. And she needs to interact with other children her age. Either one of these could be stilting her growth, hence her lack of talking.”

Not only that, but Eldra also had no idea how her daughter would react if they ever managed to re-enter society in the future. But she didn’t voice this thought to Maul; she was certain that would only send him over the edge.

But he was at least listening to her and considering her words. “I could take her out onto the landing platform. She likes watching the ships and speeders go by. As for interacting with other children, I could ask the droid to create a holographic image of one.”

Eldra shook her head. “No, Maul. She needs to interact with living, breathing children, not a fake image that isn’t really there.”

“What do you expect me to do? Hold a playdate?” He threw his arms up in the air. “The only other option is to kidnap a child, but I doubt _that_ would meet your Jedi standards!”

“You _know_ what I’m asking of you, Maul.” Eldra kept her voice low; Kassandra hated it when they argued. “Your daughter deserves to grow up _free_.”

“She _is_ free.”

“If this is freedom, then I’m Jabba the Hutt.”

“Ree!”

It took a few moments for both her and Maul to fully comprehend what they’d just heard. Eyes wide, they turned towards their daughter.

Kassandra was clapping at the screen, which was now showing a full-scale protest. They were a normal occurrence at the Games whenever the Fathiers raced, and always involved two groups. One group protested for safer measures, to prevent Fathiers and their riders from dying in racing accidents.

The other group protested against racing altogether. They argued that it was animal cruelty, and that the creatures deserved to be free.

“Mama!” Kassandra looked over at her parents. “Da!”

“She’s talking.” Maul watched his daughter with a mixture of pride and awe. “She’s…”

“Ree! Ree! Ree!” Their daughter turned back to the screen and started clapping again.

Eldra looked at the chanting protestors on the screen, and realised what her daughter was trying to say.

“ _Free! Free! Free!_ ”

“Free. She’s saying ‘free’.” She was tempted to point this out to Maul, maybe try and convince him that this had to be a sign from the Force.

But before she could, Kassandra waved her hands around in excitement and knocked over the tower of bricks – and they were falling towards her.

Eldra and Maul both moved at the same time. She reached out with the Force to stop them in mid-air, while he dived forwards with speed she didn’t know he possessed. He grabbed their daughter and rolled them both out of the way; he hadn’t even noticed that there was no need to act so quickly.

With Kassandra safe, Eldra let the bricks drop to the floor. She watched as Maul sat down on the sofa and immediately started fussing over their daughter, checking her over for any signs of injury or distress. But Kassandra had barely reacted to the incident; she just settled herself in her father’s arms and kept watching the screen.

Taking a seat beside them, Eldra stroked her daughter’s head between her growing lekku. The swirls were growing with them, and Eldra gently traced her fingers along the patterns.

Maul at least knew to protect Kassandra from any immediate dangers. Meaning there was hope that he would protect her from the greater danger that lay ahead of them.

And though she hated it, all Eldra could do was wait.

\---

The scream pierced his dreams and violently yanked him back into the real world.

It only took a second for Maul to realise who had woken him, and he immediately scrambled out of his bed and charged towards the quarters Eldra still shared with their daughter. When he raced inside and opened their door, he felt the dark presence of his master hovering in the air.

Kassandra was standing in her crib, clutching the bars with an iron grip and had tears streaming down her face. Eldra was on the floor, leaning against the wall and holding her head. She’d been thrown from the bed.

Maul didn’t hesitate to hurry over to his pup and scoop her up into his arms. She curled into his bare chest, taking comfort in his warm, protective embrace. Her three little horns were pressed against his skin, but he didn’t care. “Da…”

The word clutched at his hearts, and he was filled with an untameable desire to seek out his master and tear him limb from limb for daring to go near what was his. But Maul knew that he couldn’t; the man was his master, the one he was to rule beside when the galaxy was theirs. To destroy his master was to destroy his destiny.

All Maul could do was hold his little pup closer. He sat down on the bed, rocking her gently and muttering comforting nonsense in her ear.

Eldra came to sit next to them. “I woke up when she started tossing and turning. She was still asleep when she screamed. Before I could wake her up, she accidently pushed me out of the bed with the Force. Maul, was it…?”

“He came to her in her dreams,” he said.

Her eyes widened. “He can do that?”

Maul only nodded.

Turning her head, Kassandra reached out an arm towards Eldra. “Mama…”

Eldra moved in closer, and Maul shifted so he could encircle one arm around her, too. She looked up at him, her eyes fearful and her expression filled with a silent plea. One he had always denied. He didn’t speak, because he didn’t need to; she already knew what he would say. Instead he leaned forwards to press his forehead against hers. He let his eyes slip closed.

They couldn’t leave. He was like a starving man, and they were his food. His sustenance. Without them, he would die.

He just needed to figure out a way to keep them with him while also staying loyal to Sidious. He couldn’t let his master take them, and he couldn’t let them leave. The solution was seeming more and more impossible as the days went by. And if Sidious was already invading his daughter’s dreams…

Maul pulled them both closer, a possessive growl escaping from his throat.

“I’ll stay with you tonight,” he told Eldra.

She nodded, and began to pull back. He held onto her tighter.

“Maul, at least let me lie down,” she said.

He hesitated for a moment, before realising it would be hard to lower himself down while holding the both of them. So he let her go, but kept Kassandra in his lap.

Eldra laid back onto the bed and made herself comfortable, before gesturing for Maul to do the same. He carefully laid Kassandra down in between them before laying down himself, wrapping his arms around both of them. Their daughter was still awake, clearly shaken from her nightmare, but she had calmed considerably with her parents either side of her. Eldra gently stroked two fingers in between the child’s lekku while also humming her usually lullaby in order to help her go back to sleep. Maul watched her silently.

When Kassandra finally drifted off, Eldra turned her attention to him. “Maul-”

“ _I know_. I will do what I can to protect her. I promise.”

The Twi’lek sighed, before she settled down and closed her eyes. Knowing he would be unable to sleep, Maul simply watched the two beings who had crashed into his life and stolen his hearts.

And if Sidious had his way, they’d both be gone. 

More and more Maul felt like he was being backed into a corner with no escape. 


	16. Chapter Fifteen: Chasing Shadows

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is the first of a short story-arc that'll cover a more condensed and simplified version of the 'Shadow Hunter' novel. It also includes a character (and dialogue) from the 'Age of Republic' comic, and a character from the 'Jedi Quest' series.

I will protect you from all around you,

I will be here, don’t you cry

– “You’ll Be in My Heart”, _Phil Collins_

\---

“Did you get it?”

“Yeah.” Zek Peiro removed the Holocron from his pocket, though he made no move to hand it over. “But first, I wanna see my credits. The last Neimoidian I worked for tried to con me out of my pay, and it didn’t end well for him. If you know what I mean.”

The Neimoidian, Hath Monchar, waved his hand. There was another Neimoidian standing to his right (whose name Zek couldn’t be bothered to learn), and he brought forwards a briefcase. He set the case down on the Neimoidian’s desk and opened it, revealing half a million unmarked credits.

Satisfied, Zek placed the Holocron on the desk beside it. “Will that be all, Mr. Monchar?”

“Yes, yes. You can go now.” Monchar snatched up the Holocron and waved him away, not even sparing him a second glance.

Zek closed the briefcase and left, wanting to get as far away as possible from the object he’d been hired to steal. It was doing things to his head; whispering things and heightening his senses to the darkness that surrounded him. He didn’t expect anything else from a relic of the Jedi, but it still unnerved him.

There were pros and cons to Zek Peiro’s line of work. On the one hand, it paid well, since most of his clients were crime bosses, cartels or businessmen who could afford to hire the best of the best. But on the other hand, dealing with these top-siders showed him the sort of people who were running not just Coruscant, but the galaxy as a whole. There was a small part of him that was tempted to go straight to the Jedi and rat them all out, but then he would lose his best customers and then where would he be?

Once he’d left the building, Zek hopped onto his speeder and immediately retreated down into the lower levels. There was way too much sunlight up top for his tastes. But as he retreated downwards, he couldn’t help but go against his business mantra of “ask no questions” and wonder why the Neimoidian was willing to pay so much for such a small, insignificant thing. Sure, it was a Jedi relic, but it wasn’t even located in the Temple. The only time people paid him that much money was when the job was extremely dangerous.

He hoped that wasn’t the case, and that he hadn’t just angered the wrong people.

\---

“Mama! Da! Up! Up! Up!”

Maul opened his eyes to find Kassandra squished in between him and Eldra. Her cuddly wolf was tucked under her arm, and she was playing with her mother’s headtails, giggling. He watched her, amused. “This isn’t your bed, little pup.”

“But not Mama’s bed,” his daughter pointed out. “Why Mama here?”

“Because your Da wanted to cuddle.” Eldra turned over, just as amused by their daughter’s presence. She then sent Maul a warning look, telling him not to mention why she was actually in his bed.

“Yes.” He nodded, figuring that what she said was sort of accurate. There had certainly been some cuddling at the end of it. “Cuddle.”

“Cuddles! I wanna cuddle!” Kassandra pounced on Maul, and he rolled onto his back from the momentum.

He chuckled and stroked the back of his pup’s head. She was growing so fast; her patterned lekku were already past her shoulders, and though her horns were still blunt, they were getting bigger. The resemblance to her mother was uncanny, while her dual heartbeats were a constant reminder that she had come from him, too.

Maul wanted the moment to last forever. But, in what was becoming more and more frequent, his master interrupted.

The commlink on his bedside cabinet started beeping, and Maul tried not to let his anger show in front of his daughter. That would come later on his mission, when he would draw power from his anger at being kept away from his family, when he knew he had limited time with them and every second mattered.

He shared a look with Eldra, who only nodded and turned back to Kassandra. “Come on, you little Tooka.”

“No Tooka! Wolf! Grrrrrr!” Their daughter leapt from Maul to Eldra, making claws with her hands and playfully baring her teeth. Eldra scooped her up and blew a raspberry into the side of her neck, making Kassandra squeal. With the little girl distracted, Eldra was able to transport her out of the room and away from her father without any fuss. She sent Maul a smile over her shoulder before disappearing out of the room.

It filled him with a feeling of warmth, carried over from the night before. He was more certain than ever of making a suggestion he’d been contemplating for months: to let Kassandra have her own room while Eldra shared his. The thought of having her with him every night was one he was desperate to make a reality, and after what had happened the previous night, he was hopeful that Eldra would agree.

The temptation to stay and be with his family instead of going to the meeting was as strong as ever, but he knew he had to ignore it. Any mistake he made would give Sidious an excuse to take Kassandra away earlier than promised.

When he was dressed, Maul made his way into the main apartment area. Eldra was sat with Kassandra on the floor; she was helping their daughter use the Force to lift building blocks again, but instead of creating a singular tower, they were building a castle. Kassandra’s tongue was sticking out, her face set in concentration.

Eldra caught Maul’s gaze from across the room. She gave him a look that showed she still disapproved of his continued loyalty to Sidious, before turning her attention back to their daughter.

Maul pushed his conflicting feelings away as he left the building.

He met with his master in the Works, and fought to supress his fear of what would be asked of him. There was still another year to go before the blockade and subsequent invasion of Naboo, meaning he still had another year before Sidious would want to take over Kassandra’s training. But there was always the chance that his master had changed his mind…

“You summoned me, Master?” Maul knelt before the shadowy figure.

“Our plans are under threat of being discovered,” said Sidious. “The Holocron that you are using to record the child’s progress has been stolen.”

The fear that struck Maul was more painful than if he had been struck by his master’s Force lightning.

Only a Force-wielder could open a Holocron. If it made it into the hands of the Jedi, then they would open it and see Kassandra, and recognise her as Eldra’s child, and they’d come and they’d take them from him…

A nearby window shattered under the power of his rage.

“I will make them pay, Master.”

“Good,” said Sidious. “The discovery of this child would lead to the Jedi discovering us, too. This cannot be allowed to happen. You will find this thief, eliminate them and retrieve the Holocron. Is that understood?”

“Yes, Master.”

Maul hurried out of the hanger and set off on his speeder immediately. It took him several minutes to realise that he had no idea where he was going, nor did he know where to start looking. His anger was clouding his vision; all he could think about was Eldra and Kassandra, and stopping the Jedi from taking them.

He shook his head and tried to think rationally. How could Sidious have let this happen? The Sith’s existence was a closely-guarded secret that had been kept for over a thousand years, and his master was much too powerful to have slipped up so easily.

His rage nearly blinded him again. It was a test, he realised. Sidious had _let_ someone steal the Holocron to test his mettle. His family had been intentionally put at risk of being discovered, _for a test_.

He wanted to rage and scream, but there was nothing he could do. The only option was to find this thief and retrieve the Holocron before a Jedi got a hold of it.

Thinking harder, Maul realised that even if Sidious had let this happen, he wouldn’t have made it easy. And Maul could only think of one thief in the Coruscant underworld who could pull something like this off.

\---

The sense of foreboding surrounded Zek as he approached the shadowy figure. It was a feeling he felt often when dealing with new clients, and it wasn’t surprising given the shady deals and blood on their hands.

“You from the Kaitis Cartel?”

The figure nodded. He was dressed in all black robes and wore some kind of subspace mask that covered his entire face. “Yes.”

Zek leaned against the wall, keeping his distance. Either the figure was using the shadows to try and look intimidating, or he really was someone who no one should mess with. Zek was betting on the former; he could sense that the man was young, a lot younger than himself. Probably some hotshot wanting to make it big. The mask was a dead giveaway.

“This your first job working for them?” he asked.

“Yes.”

A joke about that being the only word he could say was on the tip of Zek’s tongue, but he held off. “Shame. I hate working with amateurs.”

The man’s fist clenched. “Do as you are asked, and I will make it worth your while.” He turned and walked further down into one of the back alleys.

Ignoring how his usually reliable senses had gone strangely quiet, Zek followed him. And not liking the silence, he started talking. “Your bosses are a new name around here, but the inroads they’ve made on the lower levels in such a short time is impressive. They play their hand right, they’ll be a real power here in a couple of years.”

Suddenly he couldn’t breathe and was being lifted off the ground.

As he tried desperately to grasp at the invisible hand around his throat, he looked ahead at the man who had hired him. Only, he had removed his mask, and stepped out of the shadows into the light of the streets.

And Zek Peiro found himself staring into the yellow eyes of what he could only describe as a demon.

\---

Maul had heard stories about Zek Peiro, Thief for Hire.

He’d first heard the name while gathering connections in the underworld of Coruscant, trying to build alliances like his master had done on the upper levels. At first, he’d thought that this Human’s unmatched skills were overblown, until he saw the young man in action and realised that they were a product of something else.

The Force had moved around him; connected with him. Peiro’s grasp of it was clumsy, thanks to lack of training, but it was there. He let it guide him to safes and stashes, hidden where no one else would think to look. When he’d first seen the display, Maul had been tempted to kill him in order to sate his bloodlust. The man was no Jedi, but he could have been one, had he been discovered.

Instead Maul thought of Eldra, and held off. Someone with his skill could be useful.

He’d recently had the fleeting idea of using Zek to smuggle Kassandra and Eldra somewhere safe; somewhere far away from Sidious. But the notion had been brief. To ask another for help would suggest that he wasn’t strong enough to protect his own family, not to mention he was terrified of how his master would react if he was caught. And he could think of no place in the galaxy that would be safe for them – except for the Jedi Order, and the thought of Eldra and Kassandra going anywhere near them made his blood boil.

But it didn’t matter, anyway. This man had stolen the Holocron, of that Maul was certain. And in doing so, he had jeopardised the safety of Eldra and Kassandra. It was a mistake he would soon regret.

“You will answer my questions or suffer,” he snarled at the man levitating before him. “Who hired you to steal the Holocron?”

For a moment it looked as though Zek wasn’t going to answer him, but Maul applied a tighter grip on his throat and the man’s eyes widened in panic. He started talking, only the babble was hard to discern, thanks to Maul choking the life out of him. Rolling his eyes, Maul let go and let the Human drop to the ground.

Zek coughed repeatedly and rubbed at his throat, before speaking again. “Hath Monchar. One of those Trade Federation lackeys. He paid me big to steal that thing. Don’t know why; I’m just the delivery boy. You wanna beef with someone, you go take it up with him and leave me out of it.”

The man leaned against the wall again and breathed deeply, like he’d only just realised how he’d taken the action for granted his whole life.

Maul waited until he wasn’t looking, then used the Force to pick up a shard of metal. He couldn’t use his lightsaber; even on the lower levels, that sort of wound would draw too much attention. Especially from the Jedi.

He’d already risked that by using Eldra’s name. It was a big galaxy; there must be more than one family with the name ‘Kaitis’. But there’d always been a chance that the Jedi would hear the name and investigate on the off chance it was connected to the Padawan they thought lost. Maul had used it anyway. It felt right somehow. And the Jedi hadn’t come looking, so he knew the Force was with him.

Zek didn’t see the shard until it was too late. Maul drove it into his heart, killing him painfully and instantly.

As he walked away, Maul contemplated his next move. His master had formed an alliance with the Neimoidians of the Trade Federation, and he wondered if this Hath Monchar had betrayed his brethren or had stolen the Holocron on his master’s orders.

Not that it mattered. He was a dead man either way.

\---

“All I’m saying is, I didn’t think you liked working with Neimoidians.” Lorn Pavan kept a steady pace so that his much smaller companion could keep up. “For them it’s ‘business this’ and ‘business that’, less ‘we bring the galaxy together through trade’ and more ‘if we get rid of slave labour then our profit margins will go down’.”

His employer, Tyro Caladian, showed no signs that he was tiring despite having to walk faster. Though Lorn kept it to himself, it was sometimes still hard to picture any Svivreni – who were stout, muscled, furry, and looked more at home in their native mountains – making their way on Coruscant. But Tyro was one of the best lawyers on the planet. He could have been one of the richest as well, if he hadn’t kept to his morals and steadfast belief in democracy.

It was his business mantra of only serving honest clients that drew Lorn to him. Newly fired from his old job and with his wife gone, Lorn hadn’t had anywhere else left to go. Clerking for a lawyer didn’t pay as well as clerking for the Jedi Order, but it was a job.

“He sounded frightened when he contacted me,” Tyro told him. “He insisted that he had information about a conspiracy that not only existed within the Trade Federation, but also existed at the heart of the Republic itself.”

“And you believe him?” Lorn himself was sceptical. Neimoidians weren’t exactly known for telling the truth.

Tyro shrugged. “I feel it’s my duty as a citizen of the Republic to investigate any and all accusations of corruption. And even if it doesn’t extend to the ‘heart of the Republic’, I can certainly believe that there is a conspiracy in the Trade Federation.”

Lorn at least agreed on that.

They entered the lobby of their client’s building before stepping into the turbo lift. The ride up was silent, and just when they arrived on the correct level, the lift suddenly shook from the force of an explosion. Both men managed to keep their footing, and the light above them flickered out.

The doors remained closed. Lorn pressed the button to open them manually, but they didn’t respond. Tyro put his briefcase down and yanked the doors open with his bare hands, with little to no effort. It was the first time Lorn had witnessed such a display, and was surprised how a being of such small height could be so strong.

There was smoke in the hallways coming from their client’s room, and the two men hurried towards it.

“Mr. Monchar!” Tyro called out. He stepped over the door that had been blown off by the explosion. Lorn followed him, coughing and waving away the smoke.

The room was charred black with very little items left over. Everything else had been destroyed. There were two bodies, both Neimoidian; one was lying on the floor and seemed to have taken the brunt of the explosion, while the other was slumped over what remained of the desk. Lorn recognised the second Neimoidian as Hath Monchar.

Tyro hurried over to the body of his client, though there was little hope that the man still lived. Lorn’s attention, meanwhile, had been drawn to something on the floor.

Beneath a safe that had been blown open sat what could only be a Holocron. While it looked a little different compared to the ones that were used in the Jedi Temple, it was unmistakable.

Had the Jedi been involved in this attack? Had Monchar been meaning to expose them for something they had done?

The memories flooded back to him. The Jedi Council informing him that his son was Force-sensitive. Talking with Siena and agreeing to allow their son to be trained as a Jedi. Jax being taken into the Temple, screaming and crying for his parents, and the regret that filled Lorn immediately afterwards. Being fired from his job within the Temple, as per Jedi policy – a policy they’d neglected to inform him of. Demanding to have his son back, only to be refused. Siena leaving him because of it…

His life had been ruined by the Jedi. If there was some dark secret they were trying to hide, he could expose them. Better yet, he could use this information to barter with them: the Holocron in exchange for his son.

He turned around to make sure that Tyro wasn’t looking. The Svivreni was using his commlink to contact the police, his back turned. Acting quickly, Lorn bent down and swiped up the Holocron before shoving it in his pocket.

“I would put that back, if I were you.”

Lorn’s commlink was suddenly ripped from his arm and crushed in mid-air. Out of the corner of his eye, Lorn saw Tyro’s commlink also ripped from his hand before being crushed, and the Svivreni’s ears twitched with fear while his fur stood on end. Lorn spun around and froze up at the sight before him: a Zabrak dressed in all black, his red face covered in black tattoos, and his yellow eyes almost glowing in the dim light.

He was holding an ignited lightsaber, and Lorn would call him a Jedi – except that he had never seen a Jedi with a red blade before. 


	17. Chapter Sixteen: No One is Safe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some bits of dialogue have been borrowed from "Jedi Quest: The False Peace". I'd also like to apologize for daring to mention midi-chlorians. I'm so, so sorry, but I had no choice.

They can’t hear us, save us,

there’s nowhere for us to escape

– “Feels Like Falling”, _UNSECRET Feat. Erin McCarley_

\---

The white hair of Darsha Assant blew in the slight breeze that always seemed to be present in certain areas of Coruscant’s lower levels.

She was standing with her master, Anoon Bondara; a Rutian Twi’lek and the man who had found her on Aldaraan when she’d been nothing but an orphan. He was speaking with a police droid about the body that had been found, and Darsha’s gaze was drawn again to the deceased male before she had to look away from all of the blood.

Zek Peiro had been infamous on the lower levels, according to reports. Considered a wanted man by the law and a desired asset by outlaws, it looked as though his luck had finally run out (if the Jedi believed in that sort of thing). But even so, getting stabbed in the heart by a shard of metal was a gruesome way to die. Darsha didn’t think someone who was merely a thief for hire deserved a fate like that.

“Are you certain of this?”

Her master’s words pulled her back into the conversation, but she didn’t dare ask him to repeat himself. It was bad enough that he was continually reprimanding her for daydreaming, but to do it so close to her Trials…

“The midi-chlorian test was conclusive,” said the police droid.

Darsha’s eyebrows went up when she realised what they were talking about. “He was Force-sensitive?”

“It would certainly explain why his skills were far greater than that of his rivals. Excuse me.” The droid walked over to the forensic droid that was still examining the body.

Anoon stroked his chin, deep in thought. “This changes things.”

“Master?”

“Even Force-sensitives who have not been trained can still tap into their potential,” he explained. “I too have heard of Zek Peiro’s unmatched skills in thievery and evasion. Someone like him should have seen his death coming.” He looked down at his apprentice, expecting her to follow his line of thought and draw her own conclusions.

She thought deeply, trying to grasp what was right in front of her. Force-sensitives could still be caught off-guard. Jedi who died before their time were proof of that. But Zek Peiro had made a living out of staying one step ahead of the law; he specialised in knowing when danger was coming. Meaning that the only way he could have been caught off-guard was if…

“He was killed by a Force-wielder.”

The Twi’lek nodded. “And that Force-wielder doesn’t want to be discovered.”

Before they could further discuss the revelation, the police droid re-joined them. “We have received intel from one of Mr. Peiro’s associates concerning his last employer. He was hired by Deputy Viceroy Hath Monchar of the Trade Federation, and while the details of the job are not known, he was paid half a million unmarked credits for his services.”

Darsha’s eyes widened. “ _Half a million_ credits? Must have been some job.”

“Yes, and whoever he was stealing from could have been responsible for this,” said Anoon. “Come along, Padawan. I think we should pay Mr. Monchar a visit.”

\---

Lorn knew he was going to die that day.

In his panicked mind, all sorts of crazy notions hit him from all sides; things he would never have considered before, even during his darkest moments when his hatred of the Jedi was near all-consuming. Notions such as did Jedi have assassins? Assassins who were let loose when dark secrets about the Order were in danger of being uncovered?

And if that was the case, then Lorn knew he needed to do everything in his power to show this secret to the galaxy, even if it killed him.

“Jedi.” The word slipped past his lips against his will.

The Zabrak’s gaze snapped to him. There was anger in his deeply unsettling yellow eyes, an anger that seemed almost familiar. He started to move, and Lorn’s hand went to the blaster at his side. If this was the end for him, he wanted to at least go down fighting.

But something behind the Zabrak caught his attention, and he turned with lightning speed. A second blade appeared from his lightsaber, blocking the strike of another lightsaber, this one green. Yet another blade joined the fray; a yellow one.

Green and yellow were colours more familiar to Lorn. Jedi. They were fighting the unknown assassin, and all of the crazy notions about them left his mind in an instant. He felt stupid for even considering them. And though his resentment towards them hadn’t changed, he knew they weren’t evil, and he was relieved at their arrival. They were probably the only ones who could defeat this other Force-wielder.

With a roar that sounded like an animal’s, the Zabrak leapt back over the threshold towards the two Jedi. Lorn moved towards the fight so he could get a better look, wondering if the Jedi were anyone he knew. They weren’t; the one with the green blade was an older Twi’lek male, and the one with the yellow blade was a Human female with white hair. She was the apprentice; Lorn could tell by her Padawan braid.

“Darsha!” the Twi’lek said to his apprentice. “Get them out of here! Protect them!”

The Padawan, Darsha, took several steps back from the fight. When she was certain that her master was holding the Zabrak’s attention, she jumped and used both the Force and her momentum to run along the wall above the battle. Upon landing on the other side, she hurried over to the doorway and beckoned to the two men inside.

“Quickly!”

Though Lorn was hesitant to trust a Jedi, his self-preservation won out and he ran out the door. Looking behind him, he saw Tyro hurriedly searching through draws.

“Tyro, come on!” Lorn waved his hand at his friend.

Their gazes met, but before Tyro could move, the walls above and around the door began to crumble. Lorn turned to see that the Zabrak had knocked the other Jedi back and was using the Force, focussing all of his energy on the walls. With a snarl, he brought it all down along with a good chunk of the ceiling, blocking the doorway.

Lorn almost didn’t get out of the way in time, but was yanked back by Darsha. He snatched his hand back from her immediately and hurried back to the door. “Tyro!”

“I’m fine!” the Svivreni called from the other side. “Go! I’ll catch up!”

He didn’t want to leave his friend behind, but there was no other choice. Lorn made a break for the turbo lift and mashed the button repeatedly. It took him a few moments to realise that the lift wasn’t working. The power had gone out.

Looking back down the hall, he saw Darsha standing between him and the fight going on between the Zabrak and her master. He could see the conflicted feelings in her eyes as she looked between the pair; she wanted to join the fight, but also knew she had to obey her master’s wishes.

And Lorn could see why she was conflicted: the Jedi Master was struggling against the Zabrak. Though he was older and looked more experienced, his age was also a hinderance, making his movements slower. The Zabrak, while less experienced, was younger and faster – and far more brutal. He threw all of his anger and emotion into the fight, and Lorn was almost mesmerised by the sight. So used to seeing Jedi fight with tranquil control, bearing witness to what they would be like with the brakes off was, honestly, quite terrifying.

That horror increased when the Zabrak blindsided the Jedi by hitting his forehead with the hilt of his lightsaber. But instead of impaling him with his own blade, he used the Force to pick up a shard of metal from the nearby rubble and impaled him with that, instead.

The Padawan screamed.

Knowing what would happen next, Lorn turned his attentions back to the turbo lift. It still wasn’t working. Though he wasn’t as strong as Tyro, he channelled his adrenaline into his arms and struggled to force the doors open. Hope of escape faded when he saw no lift on the other side, just a dark drop straight down.

He turned back to see the Padawan readying herself to fight the Zabrak, who was stalking towards them. One of his blades was dragging along the floor, sending sparks up behind him. It was an intimidating display.

But what the Zabrak hadn’t noticed was that the Jedi Master was still alive, if barely. Lorn watched as he raised his hand, summoned the Force, and pushed.

Lorn was blown off his feet and sent hurtling down the lift shaft.

Panic quickly overtook him. All he could think about was that he was falling, and that the Jedi had pushed him. Crazy notions filled his mind once more. They were just as bad as this Zabrak assassin; first they took his son, then lost him his job, lost him his wife, and now they were going to take his life, as well. The galaxy would be a better place without the Jedi, he decided, and if he survived, he was going to join the first anti-Jedi group he found.

He turned in the air and saw Darsha in the same predicament above him, though she managed to collect herself quickly. She disengaged her lightsaber, streamlined herself so she soared down to Lorn’s level, then wrapped an arm around him. He tried to push her off him. If he could grab a hold of something…

“You need to calm yourself!” she shouted. “Most people die before they even hit the ground because they panic! Control your fear, and let me worry about the landing!”

Though the thought of having to rely on a Jedi made his blood boil, Lorn did as she said and let his whole body relax. No sooner had he done so, he saw the ground beneath them coming up fast, and almost panicked all over again. But then Darsha reached out with the Force and slowed their descent, allowing them to land safely at the bottom of the lift shaft.

Lorn collected himself with several deep breaths. “Thank you,” he muttered. Jedi she may be, he owed her his life.

She didn’t acknowledge him; she was looking upwards. Lorn followed her gaze, and saw a faint red light at the top of the shaft. The Zabrak was attempting to follow them.

“We need to hurry.” Darsha looked around them for a way out, but there were no doors; the last set of doors were several feet above them. Thinking fast, Darsha ignited her lightsaber and began to cut a hole through the floor.

“What are you doing?!” Lorn looked between her and the Zabrak above them. At this point, he honestly didn’t know which one was worst. “Do you even know what’s beneath us?!”

“A Trade Federation warehouse,” she said with confidence. “It should be abandoned at this time of day.”

“Meaning it will also be locked.”

Before Darsha could respond, she finished cutting the circle around them and they fell through the floor. It was a short drop, and they both rolled across the floor when they hit it.

Lorn sat up and surveyed their surroundings. The warehouse was reasonably large, but not massively so. There were crates of all sorts lying around, and as Darsha said, there wasn’t a single soul to be found. No windows meant no natural light, though the darkness was kept at bay by a number of dim lights dotted about.

Darsha got to her feet and held out a hand towards him. He ignored it and got up on his own. “We need to find a way out of here. That… _thing_ destroyed my commlink. I don’t suppose you have one?”

She patted her pockets and turned up empty. “I must have forgotten to pick it up before I left the Temple this morning. Not the first time that’s happened…” She turned away, her face twisting with disappointment. “Why did he say I was ready for the Trials? All I ever do is make mistakes. Daydreaming, forgetting things… And now he’s…”

For a moment it looked as though tears were starting to form in her eyes, before she sucked in a breath and pushed the emotions away. She then started looking around the warehouse for a way out, acting as if nothing had happened.

Lorn found himself pitying her. She was barely just a woman, early twenties at most, and she wasn’t even allowed to cry. Emotions were what made people… well, _people_. What kind of a life would it be to feel… _nothing_?

And he had given his son to that life. For the first time since it had happened, he felt anger at himself instead of the Jedi. If only he hadn’t been so quick to decide, if only he had learned more about what would happen to Jax…

He shook his head. There wasn’t time to worry about what ifs. They had more pressing matters. “What even _was_ he? That assassin? He was Force-sensitive, but no Jedi.”

“I’m not sure,” said Darsha. “I know he’s a Nightbrother. I recognised the tattoos.”

“Nightbrother?” Lorn frowned. “What the kriff is a Nightbrother?”

“The Nightbrothers are a clan of Zabraks on Dathomir,” the Padawan explained. “Another clan, the Nightsisters, rule over them. The Dathomirians are all Force-sensitive, but they’ve never been known to carry lightsabers.”

“I’ve never seen a lightsaber that colour,” said Lorn. “I didn’t think you could even _get_ red blades. Or can you?”

“Only with the dark side. It’s called crystal bleeding. The practise died out when…” She trailed off, deep in thought, before her eyes widened in realisation. “No… It can’t be… They were wiped out…”

Lorn watched her carefully. “They? Who were wiped out?”

Darsha met his gaze, and in her eyes, he saw something he’d never seen in a Jedi before: unbridled terror. “The Sith.”

The name awoke some form of primal fear deep within him, and he shuddered involuntarily before trying to push the fear away. He had heard stories; stories of a war long ago, when the Jedi had fought an ancient enemy and an empire that had nearly conquered the entire galaxy. Records were few and incomplete, thanks to many centuries of peace wiping them from the collective memory.

“You mean that monster story you Jedi tell Younglings at night?” he questioned. The Zabrak they had faced certainly fit the description.

“We can’t be certain, not until we investigate further. But even if that’s what he is, what was he even after?” said Darsha, asking both him and herself. “If he was the one Zek stole from…”

“Zek?” asked Lorn, as they started to walk through the warehouse.

“Zek Peiro,” she replied. “He was a Force-sensitive thief for hire. My master and I were investigating his murder. We heard that his last job was from Hath Monchar, so we were on our way to question him about it.”

“Hath Monchar is dead.”

“I assumed. Why were you there?”

Lorn sighed. He didn’t see any harm in telling her, especially since it could help them get out of the situation alive. “Tyro and I were contacted by Mr. Monchar because he insisted that he possessed information regarding some kind of conspiracy at the heart of both the Trade Federation and the Republic.”

Darsha frowned. “If that man is truly what I think he is, then I think we just found out what the conspiracy is. The Sith have returned. We need to get back to the Jedi Temple immediately and inform the Council.”

“Will they believe you?” Lorn asked. The last thing he wanted to do was go to the same people who had taken his son from him, even though he knew deep down that they were probably the only ones who could stop this foe. “I’ve heard they’re not the most reasonable bunch. And that Sith took care not to kill your master with a lightsaber.”

“I know.” Darsha looked away. “He did the same thing to Zek Peiro. If only we had some kind of proof.”

Lorn’s hand went to his pocket, but he hesitated. The Holocron was the only leverage he had; the only way he could potentially get his son back. But if the Sith truly had returned, then that meant the Jedi were in danger. And that included his son. Even if he _did_ get Jax back, he doubted the Sith would spare him simply because he’d left the Order. What if they came for Jax to be trained as a Sith?

He needed to do the right thing.

So, Lorn removed the Holocron from his pocket and showed it to Darsha. “I found this in the office. This has to be what was stolen.”

The Padawan’s eyes widened. “That’s a Holocron… but not a Jedi one.”

“Can you open it?”

“If it’s a Sith Holocron, then only the dark side can open it,” she explained. “But it could be neutral. Only one way to find out.”

Darsha closed her eyes and reached out her hand towards it, calling on the Force. Her face scrunched up in concentration, and for a moment, Lorn thought that it would refuse to respond to her and stay closed.

But then it started to move. It lifted from his hand and opened, pieces separating and floating around the main cube. The whole thing lit up, and from within it, a holovid started to play. Lorn expected it to show some kind of warning or master plan, or perhaps someone being tortured.

Instead, it showed the last thing he expected to see.

A child.

\---

Maul had never felt so powerful. He would be revelling in his victory against the Jedi Master, if he wasn’t still in the throes of desperation.

He had killed his first Jedi. At last. It wasn’t how he would have preferred to kill the Jedi; the sacred rite he had wanted when he’d first fought Eldra had been discarded, simply because he didn’t have time. And he would have preferred to strike the man down with his lightsaber, only that would have drawn unnecessary attention from the rest of the Jedi. This was a test, after all. Leaving evidence would make him a failure.

But a Jedi death was a Jedi death, and he should have felt _something_. Instead he was filled with that familiar emptiness; that nothingness. There was no rising anger, no satisfaction. Perhaps it was because this Jedi Master was a Rutian Twi’lek like Eldra and Kassandra, and that familiarity was preventing him from truly revelling in his victory. Or perhaps he would just have to kill more Jedi in order to finally start to feel a sense of purpose, instead of the emptiness that seemed to always be in its place.

At least the emptiness had faded somewhat, thanks to Eldra or Kassandra. They filled it.

Thinking of them calmed him for only a moment, because they reminded him of his mission. That clerk still had the Holocron, and worse still, he had a Jedi with him. A Padawan, but then Eldra had proven that Padawans could be just as deadly and skilled as the Masters who trained them.

Eldra… She was in danger of being discovered, she and their pup. Maul knew he needed to move quickly if he had any chance of stopping the duo before they made it to the safety of the Jedi Temple. But first, he had another problem to take care of.

“Hello? Is anyone there?” The Svivreni shook the broken commlink before hitting it against his hand, trying to make it work. “Curran, is that you? Listen to me. I’ve dug through Monchar’s files, looking for anything that alluded to this conspiracy he told me about. And I stumbled on something. Something… something terrible.”

There was a lot of static in the connection when the person on the other end tried to respond. Maul crept silently towards the lawyer, who thought he was alone in the remains of the Deputy Viceroy’s office. He hadn’t considered that someone would be able to climb through the window.

Maul wanted more than anything to go after the Jedi and the clerk, but Sidious would have his head if he let any details about their plan slip. And it was clear that this Svivreni lawyer had discovered the truth.

“We can’t talk about it over a commlink,” the Svivreni continued. “We must meet. This involves the highest level-”

Knowing that he couldn’t let the man say anymore, Maul once again raised a metal shard from the rubble by the door and used the Force to impale it through the being’s heart. It killed him instantly, cutting him off mid-sentence, and his lifeless body dropped to the floor. There was still static on the other end of the commlink, so Maul crushed it some more, silencing it.

The young Sith then used the Force to move the Svivreni towards the rubble. He had done the same to the Jedi on the other side; it made it look like both had been killed in the collapse. Hopefully the planet’s police would assume that the destruction had been caused by the explosion.

He left via the window, climbed into another on the floor below and planned his next move. There was a warehouse underneath the building; the Jedi and the clerk would be looking to escape it and find their way to the Temple. He needed to cut them off, kill them both and retrieve the Holocron.

In his head, Eldra’s voice started whispering to him; telling him to stop all this senseless killing and to think about the opportunity that was before him. He could find this Jedi and tell her his predicament, ask her to help him get his family to safety…

But he violently pushed the notion away. His family was _his_ to protect, and he vowed to kill any Jedi who went near them. 


	18. Chapter Seventeen: Burning Us Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a reference to a well-known vine in this chapter. Anyone familiar with vines will probably spot it right away.

You forfeit all rights to my heart!

You forfeit the place in our bed!

– “Burn”, _Hamilton on Broadway_

\---

Lorn and Darsha watched the holovid in silence, not quite able to believe what they were seeing. Perhaps if the child was being tortured or at least raised incorrectly… While it would be terrible to watch, it would at least make sense given what was known about the Sith.

But the child looked… happy. She was raising building blocks with the Force to create a tower, and laughing with joy.

The little girl was dressed in the usual attire of a Jedi Youngling, only without a headdress typically worn around the top of a Twi’lek’s lekku. She was a Rutian Twi’lek like Darsha’s master, but what stood out were the three horns atop of her forehead. They were small, had probably only just grown out of being nothing more than stumps. But it was clear what they were.

Darsha’s eyes widened in realisation. “The Sith is her father.”

Lorn looked to Darsha and then back to the holovid. It was hard to picture that monster as a father, and yet, the horns were in the same position as the Zabrak’s three front horns. Added to that, they had a Holocron that contained holovids of a half-Zabrak child, while being pursued by a Zabrak who potentially owned the Holocron. It would be too much of coincidence for it not to be true.

And then Lorn remembered the anger he had seen in the Zabrak’s eyes, back in Monchar’s office. That was why it looked familiar, he realised; it was a father’s anger when his child was threatened, and the same anger Lorn himself had felt when the Jedi had refused to return his son to him.

“That’s why he wants the Holocron back,” he said aloud. “If it falls into the wrong hands, then the safety of his child is compromised.”

The Padawan frowned at him. “Are you actually sympathising with a Sith?”

“If you looked into his eyes, you would see the same thing. Sith he may be, but right now, he’s a father willing to do anything to protect his daughter,” said Lorn. “And we’re standing between them.”

“You’re saying that he loves this child?”

Before Lorn could answer, the holovid changed. It showed the Sith Lord, standing with a dark hood concealing half of his face.

“Master, the child’s progress is extraordinary,” he said. His voice was low and deadly, but he also sounded young. Lorn estimated that the Zabrak couldn’t be any older than Darsha. “She is strong in the Force, and-”

He was cut off by the child in question walking into frame and tugging on the Sith’s cloak. “Da! Da!”

Lorn expected the Sith to fly off the handle for being interrupting, but there was no such reaction. Instead the Zabrak removed his hood and every ounce of intimidation in his posture left him in the space of a second. “Kassandra? I’m working right now, little pup. Where’s your mother?”

The little girl, Kassandra, held out what appeared to be a piece of paper. “Drew you and Mama! And me!”

“Did you draw this?” The Sith took the paper, and Lorn couldn’t deny the pride in his expression. “It’s impressive work. Have you shown your mother?”

The holovid ended, and Lorn could see Darsha’s conflicted thoughts on the matter play out across her face. From what little Lorn had heard about the Sith, they were supposed to be irredeemably evil; monsters of the dark side who cared for nothing but themselves. Trying to correlate that with what she’d just seen was clearly giving Darsha a headache.

In the end, she shut off the Holocron and let it land back into Lorn’s hand. “It doesn’t matter that he loves his child. The Sith once tried to conquer this galaxy, and they will try to do so again. He killed my master, and no doubt he will try and kill more Jedi. He needs to be stopped, and the child rescued.”

Lorn narrowed his eyes at her. “So you can train her as a Jedi?”

“She is strong with the Force,” was all Darsha said, as if that answered his question.

He wanted to argue – wanted to tell her that while this Zabrak might be a Sith, he had the right to keep his daughter – but stopped short when another thought occurred to him. This child was clearly important, being the offspring of perhaps the first Sith to be seen in a thousand years. And if that was the case, then the Jedi would want to take her into their ranks at all costs, if only to keep her away from the Sith.

But what if he found the girl first? He could take the child – and the child’s mother, if she needed rescuing – to the Jedi, and offer to hand her over in exchange for his son. Surely the daughter of a Sith Lord would be far more valuable to them than a regular Force-sensitive? Maybe they’d even be impressed by him, and give Jax back to him not as part of a bargain but as a show of gratitude…

“We need to get out of here and get back to the Temple.” Darsha’s voice pulled Lorn out of his thoughts. She had stopped walking and was surveying their surroundings. “The Council can then mount a rescue mission to free the child.”

Thinking fast, he said, “Would it not make more sense to go after the child ourselves? For all we know, the Sith could be moving her as we speak.”

“Good point,” said Darsha. “But we don’t even know the first place to look. She might not even be on Coruscant.” She paused, struck by a thought. “Then again, she could be. Zek Peiro only operates on Coruscant, and if the Holocron was kept in the same place as the child…”

“I have a droid,” said Lorn. “I-Five. I’m sure he’ll be able to work out where the child is.”

“OK.” After a pause, she said, “I’m Darsha, by the way. Darsha Assant.”

“Lorn Pavan.” He wondered if she would recognise his name from his time working in the Temple, but she showed no sign that she had.

They barely walked a few more steps before Darsha suddenly stopped dead, eyes closed. Lorn had been around enough Jedi to know that she’d sensed something in the Force, so remained quiet and watched her work. Only a few seconds later, Darsha’s eyes snapped open and she turned, igniting her lightsaber.

Through the darkness a figure jumped towards them, and the double red blades igniting in mid-air answered the unspoken question as to who it was. The Sith.

Their blades clashed, and Darsha called over her shoulder, “Go! I’ll hold him off!”

He knew he should listen to her and run, but Lorn found himself hesitating. Darsha reminded him of a time when he hadn’t hated the Jedi; when he’d seen them as heroes who defended the galaxy and stood up for those who couldn’t help themselves. She was what a Jedi should be, and he found that he didn’t hate her.

Lorn didn’t have time to contemplate what might have happened, if they’d had more time. Could they have been friends? Could she have helped him get Jax back? Or would she have proven herself to be like the Jedi who had taken him? He would never know.

In the end, the possibility of getting his son back was more important than helping her, so he ran.

\---

Darsha fought with everything she had. But she knew deep down that if her master – Anoon Bondara, Battlemaster of the Jedi Order and one of its greatest duellists – couldn’t defeat this Sith, then what hope did she have?

He’d wanted to follow Lorn when the man ran, but she was able to stop him. His actions confirmed that he was more concerned about the Holocron and what it contained, rather than killing Jedi. It was still hard to stomach, that this brutal creature with a monstrous face could love anything, but she couldn’t deny what was right in front of her.

The anger in his eyes was born from a parent’s desperation to protect his child. Darsha could see it now, thanks to Lorn pointing it out. And he was using that unchained emotion to fuel his every move, drawing power from not just his anger, but his love.

This had to be why love was forbidden for the Jedi, Darsha realised.

“You are not the first Padawan I have faced,” said the Sith. “I thought there would be more to you. Your master was a worthy opponent; a warrior. He has clearly not taught you well.”

Darsha felt her anger grow, but she quickly pushed it down again. The Sith was trying to bait her into giving into her emotions; trying to make her slip, or make her fall into the dark, it didn’t matter. Instead she focussed on what he’d said and the Force urged her on, as if it was trying to tell her something.

She was not the first Padawan he’d faced, he’d said. There were thousands of Jedi, but in these times of peace the death of a Jedi was rarer, and each passing was known by everyone in the Temple. So, whoever this Padawan was _had_ to be dead, or else he or she would have immediately informed the Council that the Sith had returned.

As she continued fighting, she ran through a list of names in her head, remembering all of the Padawans who had been killed or gone missing since she had been at the Temple. She evaluated each circumstance of death, debating whether or not the death was suspicious…

Until she reached one name. Eldra Kaitis.

The Force screamed at her, and everything clicked.

Her eyes widened. She had thought, upon seeing the child in the holovid, that she looked familiar. And now she knew why.

She and Eldra had grown up together in the Purrgil Clan. They hadn’t been especially close, having different friendship groups, but they’d taken the same classes and eaten the same meals, and Darsha remembered the day when Eldra had been declared missing and then when she’d been presumed dead by the Council…

But she was alive. Captured by the Sith.

And she’d had a child with one.

Anger rose up again. “You… You took Eldra! What did you _do_ to her?!”

The Sith moved faster than she thought anyone was capable of, and the next thing she knew there was a metal pipe sticking out of her chest.

Darsha dropped her lightsaber and collapsed to the floor, the pain unbearable. She felt the blood staining her robes, and her vision started blurring. But the Sith standing above her was still clear as day, and the fierce protectiveness in his gaze startled her.

“Are you Siri?” he asked.

That confirmed it. Siri was Eldra’s best friend. “No. My name is Darsha.”

“She never spoke of you.”

“We weren’t close.” It was getting harder to speak and stay focussed, but Darsha kept going. “Doesn’t mean I don’t… care.”

The Sith knelt beside her. “Eldra and our child are mine to protect. Rest assured that they are safe with me.”

Darsha looked into his eyes one last time, and saw that his words weren’t false assurances. He truly believed this.

“No one is safe in the dark,” she told him, before giving her life to the Force.

\---

“Hurry, I-Five. He could be here at any moment.”

“It is impossible for me to process this information any faster than my current pace,” said the droid. I-5YQ was a silver protocol droid Lorn had purchased to help him with his work, and after removing his restraining bolt, the droid had become one of the few friends he had.

And perhaps now, he was his only friend. Lorn suspected that Tyro had been killed by the Sith, and since Darsha hadn’t caught up with him…

The droid was a terrific slicer. While accessing a Holocron’s data was impossible without opening it (and _that_ was something that could only be achieved by a Force-wielder), he had managed to connect to the Holocron on a more technical level in order to discover its point of origin.

After a few tense minutes of silence, there was a beep.

“Did you get it?” asked Lorn.

“I have downloaded the location to your datapad,” said I-Five.

“I-Five, you’re a lifesaver.” Lorn grabbed his satchel before he stuffed his datapad and the Holocron inside. He checked that his blaster was still attached to his belt, and then on a whim, grabbed an electro-magnetic pulse grenade that had been given to him by Tyro after a particularly nasty incident with an assassin droid.

I-Five eyed him carefully. “Lorn, are you certain you will need that?”

“I have no idea what I’m walking into,” he said. He knew why I-Five was being cautious; this particular droid popper was far stronger than a normal grenade, and could permanently damage a droid. Realising that he didn’t want I-Five to get caught up in its radius accidentally, Lorn said, “You don’t have to come along. There’s something else you can do, if you want to.”

“You are my friend, Lorn,” said the droid. “I will do anything for you.”

“Record a message for me, and take it to the Jedi Temple. If I don’t survive this, you might be the galaxy’s last hope.”

\---

With Kassandra distracted, Eldra had been intending to sit down at read the latest holojournal. But her datapad remained untouched on the table, and instead she watched her daughter waving her toys around in the air with the Force.

She was already two years old. Time was passing for Eldra so quickly, and she feared that all too soon, the Sith master would come for her daughter. Maul had promised to find a way to keep them both with him, but Eldra couldn’t see how he could accomplish this while staying where they were. She found herself staring out the window at Coruscant’s traffic, wondering how much the world outside had changed in the four years she’d been held prisoner.

“Mama?”

Eldra returned her gaze to her daughter. “Yes, Kassie?”

“When Da home?” she asked.

“Soon.”

Kassandra turned her attention back to her toys for only a moment, before going still. The toys fell to the floor around her. She then looked towards the front door, but it wasn’t with the usual excitement whenever Maul returned.

A few seconds later, Eldra sensed it, too. It wasn’t the Sith master, thankfully, but it was an unfamiliar presence. She got to her feet and placed herself in front of her daughter, before calling her lightsaber to her hand. If the intruder was a threat, then she would be prepared to fight for her daughter’s safety. But then if it was a rescue…

Venny walked into the room just as the door’s controls began to spark. “We have been breached. Prepare to take all necessary precautions.”

The door opened, and after a moment’s pause, a grenade rolled into the room.

Eldra acted immediately, grabbing Kassandra off the floor and running towards their quarters. Half way down the hall, she heard the familiar sound of a droid popper instead of the explosion of a normal grenade, but she didn’t stop running. She reached their shared room and placed Kassandra down on the bed. “Kassie, stay here for Mama, OK? Hide yourself like I taught you.”

“Yes, Mama.” Kassandra grabbed her stuffed wolf and held it close to her chest.

After placing a kiss on her daughter’s forehead, Eldra ran back out of the room and locked the door behind her. She then hurried back into the main apartment area and saw a Human male standing by the front door with a blaster in his hand. He had black hair and brown eyes, but wasn’t at all dressed like a common criminal. Wearing a nice suit, he looked more like a business clerk.

But looks could be deceiving. Eldra ignited her lightsaber and held it ready. “If you’ve come for her, then know I’m prepared to strike you down to protect her.”

The man’s eyes flicked between her and the lightsaber with surprise. “You’re a Jedi?”

“Really? What gave it away?” Eldra resisted the urge to roll her eyes.

His grip on the blaster tightened. “You’re working with these monsters?!”

“What? No!” Suspicion grew in her. Did this man know about the Sith? “I was kidnapped! I’m not here by choice!”

The man lowered his blaster. “You’re the girl’s mother. Why… How do a Jedi and a Sith have a _child_ together?”

This man not only knew about Kassandra, but he also knew that Maul was a Sith. There was a story here, and Eldra sensed that she needed to know it. Disengaging her lightsaber, she said, “Maybe you should start from the beginning. Who are you and why are you here?”

He watched her warily before sighing. “My name is Lorn Pavan. You may or may not have heard of me. I used to work as a clerk for the Jedi Order, until they accepted my son for training. They fired me because of this.”

“It’s the non-attachment rule,” said Eldra.

Lorn rolled his eyes. “I know that! But the Jedi didn’t tell me before I made the decision. They must have suspected that if I knew that, I would’ve never let them take Jax. He… he was only two years old, and he was ripped from my arms, and when they fired me and I asked for him back, they refused.”

Eldra couldn’t believe what she was hearing. This didn’t sound like the Jedi Order she knew; these actions sounded more like political bureaucrats. “I’m sorry. I never knew this. When did this happen?”

“Four years ago,” said Lorn. “I suppose you had already been kidnapped?”

She nodded. “You may have heard of me. Eldra Kaitis?”

The man’s eyes widened. “Yes. They were still searching for you when I was fired. I’m sorry this has happened to you.”

“Why are you here, Lorn?”

He hesitated briefly, before removing a familiar Holocron from his satchel. “I believe this was stolen from the Sith holding you captive. I found it in the exploded office of the Trade Federation’s Deputy Viceroy, before the Sith hunted me down – well, me and my friend, Tyro Caladian. He must be dead now. I met up with two Jedi. One was a Padawan named Darsha Assant.”

“Darsha!” Eldra brightened at the familiar name. “She was in my Clan when we were Younglings. Where is she?”

Lorn turned his head with shame. “The Sith killed her master first. Then he came after us. Darsha told me to run, so I wasn’t there… but I waited for her, and she didn’t follow. I don’t think she made it.”

Eldra felt all the air leave her, and she collapsed to her knees.

Maul had killed Darsha. She hadn’t been a close friend, but she’d been a friend nonetheless. And Maul had killed her, because that was what he’d been trained to do. Kill Jedi. Kill her friends. She hadn’t forgotten that, but in some ways she had. She’d let him get too close, had just spent a night with him where she’d been close to happy…

“I’ll be honest,” said Lorn. “I came here to take your daughter. I… I thought I could bargain with the Jedi Council; give her to them and in exchange, they’d give me my son back. I could get you out of here, and we could go together.”

This was it. This was her chance.

Getting to her feet, Eldra took a deep breath and said, “I have a slave chip. If I leave this building, I’ll explode.”

The man nodded, understanding. “Then I can go to the Jedi and tell them where you are. If you want, I can take your child with me. Then she will be safe-”

Suddenly he was yanked violently off the floor, and Eldra stepped back quickly as she watched Lorn dangle in the air, gasping for breath. The man frantically clawed at the invisible hand around his throat, but he was helpless against the might of the Force. Before Eldra could make a move to help him, Lorn’s neck was snapped at an awkward angle, and he fell in a heap on the floor.

Standing in the doorway was Maul. His presence filled the room with a fiery anger Eldra had never felt in all of her time with him, and that anger was aimed at the man now lying dead before him. Thanks to this fact, the anger decreased, and it virtually left Maul entirely when his gaze locked with Eldra’s. He looked beyond relieved to see her safe.

The same couldn’t be said for Eldra.

Lorn may have been her last hope of escape, and Maul had snatched it away from her. Not only that, he had killed two Jedi – one of which had been her friend – and who knew how many others. Tyro Caladian was a familiar name, and she suspected he was the lawyer that Qui-Gon sometimes worked with.

Maul had reminded her that he was a Sith Lord, and he wasn’t going to give that up for anyone. Not even her. Not even for their daughter.

It was over between them. 


	19. Chapter Eighteen: Let it Burn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A scene and some dialogue has been borrowed from the "Age of Republic" comic, and more dialogue has been borrowed from a deleted scene from "The Clone Wars" TV show.

When will you learn that they are your legacy?

We are your legacy!

– “First Burn”, _Hamilton on Broadway (Outtake)_

\---

Maul took one step, then two in her direction. “Eldra, are you hurt?”

She was, but not in the way he was referring to. He was scanning her body for any signs of physical injury, not knowing that the pain was inside her. And that pain hadn’t even been inflicted by Lorn Pavan, but by Maul himself.

“Don’t.” She held out her hand, stopping him from getting any closer. “Stay right where you are.”

He frowned, confused, then started to look around the apartment. His eyes widened when he noticed the significant absence. “Where’s Kassandra?”

Eldra refused to reply. She knew he couldn’t sense their daughter; Kassandra had been practising masking her Force signature, and just that morning Eldra had been planning on surprising Maul with this new skill. She would have encouraged Kassandra to hide so Maul could find her, and then she would have teased him about being a worry wort for the rest of the evening.

Those plans were shattered. It felt like a completely different life, the one she’d been leading just that morning.

When she didn’t reply, Maul snarled and crossed the room, getting right up in her face. She didn’t flinch, and showed no signs that he was intimidating her. “ _Where is she?!_ ”

Still she said nothing, just stared him down with a glare. Eventually Maul gave up and took off around the apartment, searching for their missing daughter.

Once he was out of sight, Eldra let the tension leave her body and held back her tears. She knew it was going to be hard to reject him; knew that she couldn’t let him back into her arms or her bed, or even let him touch her. Any one of those things could make her cave and accept him back, even after all he’d done.

The bond was still there. Eldra didn’t think she could break it, even if she tried.

She was about to take a seat on the sofa when she saw something move on the floor by the door. Her eyes widened when she realised it was a droid’s foot – Venny’s foot. He had been taken out by the droid popper, and she’d completely forgotten.

Guilt rushed up on her as she hurried over and fell to her knees by the droid’s side. He looked awful; wires torn, arms detached from his body, eyes flickering… The grenade had to be stronger than usual, to do this to him. She was briefly angry at Lorn for doing this, but it didn’t last. Lorn had been her last hope of escape, and for all he knew, Venny could have been some kind of droid assassin who could’ve killed him.

“Venny!”

“Eldra…” His voice sounded different; cracked, fuzzy. His voice box had been damaged, as well. “I have been damaged… beyond repair…”

“Don’t say that,” she told him. “Maul’s cut you into pieces plenty of times before, and we’ve put you back together again.”

“No… too… damaged…” Sparks started popping up all over him. “System… failure… I… am… sorry… so… sorry…”

His lights flickered out, and then he was gone.

Eldra could do nothing but sit there and stare at him, too shocked to cry.

Venny had been annoying at times, but he’d become a surprisingly comforting presence in her life; the one person she could stand to be around whenever she’d been unable to deal with Maul and his shit. She sensed through the Force that he was right, and whatever had been done to him couldn’t be fixed. He was dead.

Leaving her alone with her daughter, and the man who would ruin them both.

Maul reappeared with Kassandra in his arms, gently stroking the back of her head. He clutched her like he’d almost lost her, and Eldra realised that in his eyes, he’d nearly lost them both. If Lorn had gotten away with the Holocron and reached the Jedi, then they would have come and rescued the pair of them.

In his eyes, Maul had saved them – when really, all he had done was doom them.

Because he wasn’t going to stop his master from taking Kassandra, nor was he going to disobey his master’s orders to kill Eldra herself. She knew that now. Her influence hadn’t been enough to change him.

She wanted to cry. She wanted to scream. But all she could do was stay silent in her tranquil fury.

“Venny!” Kassandra wriggled out of her father’s arms and hurried over to Eldra and the broken droid. “Venny…”

“He’s just sleeping,” Eldra lied. She turned her daughter away before she saw the body of Lorn Pavan, picking her up and holding her close. “Speaking of which, I think it’s _your_ bedtime, Kassie.” The sky outside was going dark. Was it really that late already?

“No!” Kassandra shook her head. “No sleep.” But she yawned, and Eldra fought to hold back her smile. With two stubborn parents, it was unsurprising that their child was just as stubborn.

Eldra carried her daughter back towards their quarters, ignoring Maul as she passed him. He went to follow, but she once again held out her finger to stop him. “Don’t. We’re not done here. We’ll talk once I’ve put her down.”

Maul seemed reluctant to argue in front of their tired daughter, so settled for stroking his fingers down the child’s lekku. “Goodnight, my little pup.”

Kassandra mumbled something in return, but it sounded like nonsense in her tired state. Upon reaching their quarters, Eldra gently laid her down on the bed they shared. She had long outgrown her cot, and it was easier for them to sleep in the same bed instead of trying to fit another bed into the room. Eldra suspected that Maul had been meaning to ask her to share his room on a more permanent basis in order to give their daughter her own room. If he’d asked that morning, Eldra would have probably said yes.

Now, she didn’t want to set a foot in his room ever again.

She placed her daughter’s wolf toy next to her, then leaned down and kissed her forehead. After watching over her for a few moments, Eldra left the room and closed the door behind her. She hoped the sound proof walls would mask what was about to happen.

Taking a deep breath, Eldra re-entered the main apartment area. Maul was emitting a low, constant growl as he paced the room, almost prowling like a predator.

“I don’t want you touching me anymore,” she said, breaking the silence. Maul stopped pacing. “I don’t want you near me. What you did today reminded me of what you are, and I can’t let you back in if you’re going to go around killing my friends.”

Maul clenched his fist. “The Jedi deserve to die for what they did to the Sith. I have told you that before. It’s not my fault that you forgot.”

“And what about me, then?” she asked. “Do I deserve to die?”

He hesitated. “You are the exception. I need you.”

Eldra shook her head. “And yet, you’ll kill me on your master’s orders when the time comes. Look, I don’t know what happened between our two Orders. The Jedi told me that the Sith were evil and needed to be destroyed, but that sounds exactly like what you’re telling me now about the Jedi, so I’m not sure anymore. And Lorn… If how they treated him is true, then it’s clear that the Jedi Order isn’t perfect. But I know that the Jedi don’t deserve to die for trying to do the right thing. And the Jedi of today don’t deserve to die for the mistakes their forebearers made in the past.”

She could tell he was trying to keep his temper, which for Maul was a notable effort. “You’re saying I should have let them live?”

“Darsha had a whole life in front of her,” Eldra explained. “She could have done so much if she’d had the chance. And her master, Anoon Bondara, was the Temple’s Battlemaster. He didn’t just teach Darsha; he taught me, too. Everything I’ve thrown at you, everything you’ve learnt from me, I learned from him.”

Maul just looked pleased with himself. “If he was the Battlemaster of the Jedi Order, then that proves I am powerful enough to protect you and Kassandra from any threat.”

“Except your master.”

He snarled and looked like he wanted to lash out, but stopped himself. “You cannot stop me from seeing my daughter.”

Eldra screwed her eyes shut and restrained herself from screaming at him. If Maul could make the effort, so could she. “I know. I know you still have to train her; still have to send holovids back to your master. But I won’t be happy about it. Your master is a piece of bantha shit, and you’re just the same. The sooner I get Kassie away from the pair of you, the better.”

Maul snarled again and went to grab her arm, but she was faster and grabbed his wrist before he could. He didn’t struggle and settled on glaring at her. “I need to keep you here. It’s the only way I can protect you.”

But Eldra just looked at him sadly. “I wish I could believe that.”

She let him go and hurried back into her quarters, locking the door behind her. She kept herself composed until she was alone in the refresher, and then she let the tears flow. Everything hurt, and it hurt more because she still had feelings for him; she couldn’t just make them go away, no matter how badly she wanted them to.

The garnet burned against her chest, but she couldn’t even bring herself to remove it.

Finally composing herself, Eldra stared at her reflection in the mirror. Bloodshot eyes stared back at her, and she made a decision. The bond couldn’t be broken, but there was something she could do. It would hurt, but it was for the sake of her sanity.

She focussed on the bond between her and Maul… and she blocked it.

And though she didn’t feel the pain on his end, she heard his anguished roar.

\---

In another part of the city, the galaxy’s only hope was snuffed out.

I-Five, knowing that his friend was dead, went to seek help from another. He couldn’t reach the Jedi Temple alone, not without being snatched from the streets by eager criminals looking for droids to sell as scrap.

Unfortunately for him, the Sakiyan he thought he could trust was one of those criminals. Tuden Sal led I-Five into his restaurant before sneaking up behind the droid and switching him off. Then, as was procedure, he wiped the droid’s memory.

And the location of Eldra and her daughter, along with the knowledge that the Sith had returned, was lost.

\---

Maul walked dutifully behind his master as they approached the petrified remains of the ancient Sith Lords.

It had been weeks since he had killed two Jedi and passed his master’s test. Two weeks since Eldra had cut him out of her life, leaving him with that familiar emptiness he had tried so hard to fill with her presence.

Every day he would check to see if she was still alive, since he could no longer feel her through their bond. And every time, she would silently glare at him until he went away, making it clear she wanted nothing to do with him. It felt like one of his hearts had been ripped from him, and the pain was almost too much to live with.

At least he still had Kassandra. His pup filled his emptiness and kept his other heart beating. But in less than a year she would be gone too, and every time he remembered that, he had to stop himself from breaking everything in sight.

It was no wonder Sidious had sensed his turmoil. Maul followed him through the ash-covered battleground, wondering what his master was up to. Was he going to be tested again? These days, he felt like the entire ordeal with Eldra and Kassandra was one big test from the Force.

That was something he hadn’t considered. Were Eldra and Kassandra merely a test he needed to pass? Did he need to eradicate them both in order to prove his dedication to the Sith? He fought back against the notion, denying that he needed to take such action. As a Sith, he had the power to take whatever he wanted. It was within his rights to possess everything he desired.

They were his. It was as simple as that.

“…the ashes of our fallen brethren hold more than one lesson,” Sidious was saying as he stopped before one of the corpses. “Breathe deep, my apprentice. Let us see what the dark side has to show you.”

Maul stepped forwards and gathered a handful of ash from the corpse, before holding it up to his nose and breathing it in. He closed his eyes as the world began to spin around him. And when he opened them, his surroundings had changed.

Light shone through the windows into a room filled with fountains. There were many beings meditating in various places around the room, and Maul clenched his fists when he recognised the Room of a Thousand Fountains from Eldra’s descriptions. He was in the Jedi Temple.

“No… No!” He stared down into one of the pools and saw that his eyes were brown instead of their usual Sith yellow. In a move of desperation, he reached for his lightsaber and found that while it was still double-bladed, the blades were blue. “This cannot be…!”

“Hey, you.”

The voice was warm and familiar, and had an immediately calming effect on him. He switched off his lightsaber before turning and smiling at the sight before him. “Eldra. You’re here.”

She smiled at him. Looking her up and down, Maul noticed that she was dressed in the same Jedi robes she’d been wearing when they first met. They fit her the same way her lightsaber fit perfectly in her hand, and he expected the emptiness in his one damaged heart to be filled by her presence.

But he felt… nothing. Not even emptiness.

“Where else would I be?” Eldra said to him, pulling him out of his thoughts. “Obi-Wan said I’d find you here. He’s gone to challenge Siri to a duel in the training room. Wanna come and watch?”

Maul looked down at himself. He too was wearing Jedi robes. They felt wrong, but not as wrong as how he felt on the inside. All of his anger and hatred had melted away, but there was nothing to replace it. No passion, no emotion. When he looked at Eldra, all he could muster was a logical conclusion that he should spend time with her because she was his equal in battle. Nothing more, nothing less.

It was all wrong.

Was this what being a Jedi felt like? Feeling… nothing? Was this how Eldra felt every day? How could she bear it? Instead of bringing him peace, Maul could feel himself going insane. He needed to feel something, but every time he tried to make himself angry or make himself hate whatever he could see, nothing happened. His emotions were just out of reach, and he didn’t know how to touch them.

“Eldra…?” She was his rock; his guiding star. If he couldn’t feel any negative emotions, surely she could help him feel the positive ones?

“Come on!” she laughed. “I’m not going without my best friend!”

“Friend…” It was the only thing that felt right in the sea of confusion. He clutched onto the small ounce of feeling that word gave him, along with her hand. But something else was missing. And then he realised that while his first heart was in his hand, his second was nowhere to be seen. “Where is Kassandra?”

Eldra frowned, confused. “Who’s Kassandra?”

And everything came crashing down.

Not literally. The room was still the same, but Maul could feel the world collapsing around him. His pup was gone; she didn’t exist, because the Jedi forbade attachments which meant he and Eldra were only friends…

Before he knew what was happening, his anger returned to him with a roar, and his lightsaber was suddenly in his hands. He beheaded a Jedi Master meditating next to a pool; the man had his back turned, and hadn’t even seen it coming. Other Jedi saw what was happening and rushed to stop him, but they were no match for his anger. He cut them down, one-by-one. Around him, the Temple began to burn.

But more importantly, he could feel again. His anger and his hatred had returned, and with it came satisfaction. He was fulfilling his destiny; achieving his victory. The Jedi were dying all around him, and their Temple was burning. He was unbeatable.

“Maul, no!”

A pair of hands grabbed him from behind, trying to stop him. Maul was too deep into his fury and stabbed his attacker without looking.

Too late did he realise who he’d just killed.

“Eldra!”

She stared at him in anguish, tears in her eyes. “Maul…”

The freedom he had felt upon his emotions returning instantly vanished. Instead they caged him with a horrific feeling that stabbed at his hearts and filled him with unbearable agony.

He discarded his lightsaber and caught Eldra as she fell, kneeling to the ground with her. “Eldra… No… I didn’t mean to…”

“You may not have meant it,” she said with her final breaths. “But you did. I am a Jedi, and it is your destiny to kill me.”

Her eyes closed, and her body turned to ash.

The cry that left Maul was one of anger and sorrow. His eyes were wet, and he hastily tried to dry them before his master saw. When he looked down at his hands, he realised he was crying tears of blood.

And what was more, the emptiness was worse than ever; worse than when he hadn’t felt anything at all.

A shadowy figure appeared before him. It was his master, but also not. And behind him, more shadowy figures appeared. Maul recognised them instantly as the Sith Lords of the past. The largest figure who loomed above them all he knew to be Darth Bane, the first in the lineage of the Rule of Two.

Maul stayed on his knees before them, his hearts crumbling from the pain that overwhelmed them. “I have done as you asked.” He had performed his Sith Sacrifice.

Because that was what Eldra was meant to be. To truly become a Sith Lord, he needed to kill the one he cared for; the one who grounded him, who connected him to the wider galaxy. It needed to be severed so he could give himself completely to the teachings of the Sith, and allow him to sink deeper into his anger and hate.

It was something he’d been denying for a long time. He was torn between her and his loyalty to Sidious, to the Sith. He wanted to have both.

The Sith Lords spoke as one, though only Sidious’s mouth moved. “Why do you weep like a child?”

“You told me that I would be free!” Maul choked out, past his tears. “You told me that all would be right!”

They spoke again. “And it is.”

It was a lie. It had to be. What he was feeling wasn’t freedom. It felt like a chain that was gradually squeezing the life out of him.

Maul looked into the eyes of the Sith Lords before him, and screamed, “ _Then why do I feel such **pain**?!_”

He called his lightsaber back to his hand and ignited both sides, before leaping at the shadows in a blind rage. They vanished, as did the ruins of the Jedi Temple, and Maul found himself standing back on Malachor.

Behind him, his master was clapping. “Good, good. Tell me, my apprentice. What did you see?”

For a moment, he hesitated to answer. How could he admit his weaknesses to his master? How could he admit his failings as a Sith?

“Many things, my master,” he said instead. Sidious didn’t need to know that he was determined never to sacrifice Eldra. He didn’t need to know that he planned to find a way to keep her and Kassandra, and prove that a Sith didn’t need to sacrifice his emotional ties in exchange for power.

If the Sith were as powerful as he’d been led to believe, he could have both.

“Good,” said Sidious. If he suspected anything, he didn’t show it. “And what have you learned from this?”

“That my emotions make me strong.”

It would take some time to win back Eldra’s trust, but he had done it before. He could do it again. If she saw how determined he was to keep her and their daughter safe, then surely, she would return to his side? It was only a matter of time. He would win her back, he would defeat the Jedi, and he would rule the galaxy alongside his master.

And yet, the feeling of triumph that came with this thought, also came with a feeling of dread. 


	20. Chapter Nineteen: Imminence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to say a big thanks to everyone who's been reading! We're coming into the homestretch now.

All I have to do

is forget how much I love him

– “Easy as Life”, _Aida on Broadway_

\---

The time had finally come.

They would reveal themselves to the Jedi, and Maul would have his revenge. Yet as he stood on the hot desert sand under the planet’s twin suns, he couldn’t feel any satisfaction from this. There was no excitement at the prospect of fighting and killing more Jedi, nor was there triumph at the fact that he and his master were so close to achieving their goal. And Maul knew why.

His master intended to take Kassandra after this mission.

Maul was running out of time to think of a compromise. The only upside to this was that it helped fuel his anger, which he channelled into a weapon. But what was more, the temptation of other options was all around him, testing his resolve and his loyalty to the Sith, and to his master.

The two Jedi were known to him. Obi-Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn. The former was a friend of Eldra’s, and she had mentioned the latter many times in her stories. The very fact that these two Jedi knew Eldra helped the voice of temptation grow; suggesting he could ask them for help instead of fighting and killing them. Every time the voice made itself heard, he pushed it away with anger.

But Eldra still wasn’t talking to him, and this only made things worse. A few times he even _considered_ the suggestions, if only to get her to speak to him again.

One of the probes he’d sent out returned to him, informing him that it had found the Queen’s ship. Once again, Maul pushed away the temptations telling him to ask the Jedi for help, and spun on his heel. He hopped onto his speeder bike and took off across the desert, pushing the vehicle to its maximum limits. The probe had also told him that one of its counterparts had been destroyed, and Maul sensed through the Force that one of the Jedi had been responsible.

Which meant that they knew they were being followed. He had to hurry if he wanted to reach them in time.

Soon the ship was in his sights, and there was a Jedi. Qui-Gon Jinn, he guessed, going by the Human man’s age. Maul felt his anger increase at the sight of him; anger at everything the Jedi stood for, anger at everything the Jedi had done to the Sith, but also anger that he wouldn’t be able to kill them just yet. His master had instructed him that morning to let the Queen and her escorts escape and reach Coruscant. Sidious hadn’t elaborated on why Maul needed to do this, by the younger Sith knew not to question his master. He assumed it was all part of his grand plan.

Just as he was flying over the sand dune, Qui-Gon Jinn turned suddenly and shouted, “Anakin, drop!”

There was movement in front of Maul, and for the first time he realised that the Jedi Master had a child with him. A Human boy, native to Tatooine, perhaps around six years older than Kassandra. The boy dropped to the ground and Maul narrowly avoided hitting him, but just as he flew over the top of the child, he sensed it.

A strong Force presence. Far stronger than Kassandra’s.

He wasn’t sure how he’d missed that, but then he’d been entirely focussed on the Jedi in front of him. Maul leapt from his bike before it had even stopped, igniting only one half of his lightsaber. Qui-Gon Jinn ignited his own and they began to clash. Over his shoulder, Qui-Gon called out, “Tell them to take off!”

The boy hurried towards the ship. Maul wondered who he was, and why the Jedi were recruiting Younglings in the middle of a mission, unless they’d found this Youngling without meaning to? Not that it mattered. It wasn’t part of Maul’s mission.

Like Anoon Bondara a year ago, the Jedi Master was skilled and experienced, but his age and weariness slowed him down. Maul slipped into Form VII, letting his ferocity loose on the Jedi, and he soon realised that the man was tiring far more quickly than Bondara had. With newfound excitement, Maul decided that regardless of what his master had instructed, he was going to end this Jedi now. Obi-Wan Kenobi was onboard the ship with the Queen, and that ship was taking off. The Queen would still reach Coruscant with a Jedi escort; it would just be one Jedi instead of two.

But then Qui-Gon Jinn used a move that Eldra favoured, and Maul was struck once more with the temptation of seeking help from these Jedi. It led to a moment of hesitation that the Jedi Master took advantage of. He knocked Maul back, turned around and jumped onto the open ramp of the ship flying above them.

Maul’s rage built inside him, but he kept up a calm exterior as he switched off his lightsaber and watched the ship go. It was no matter. He would have another chance to kill the Jedi.

He turned and walked towards his bike, which had crashed into a sand dune, but was otherwise undamaged. His master would want him to return to Coruscant promptly, so that he could be ready for the next task, but Maul also had his own reasons for wanting to return so quickly.

Kassandra and Eldra were waiting, and he needed to see them again. If he couldn’t think of a way to stop the inevitable, then it could be his last day with them.

\---

“Mama?”

Eldra blinked. She’d spaced out again.

“Yes, Kassie?” she asked, looking up from the datapad and towards her daughter, who was standing a few feet away.

Her little three-year-old had grown so much. She was talking in sentences, was a lot more active, and had become very perceptive for a girl her age. It was a relief that she hadn’t taken to her father’s bad habits of using anger and hate to express herself, but that wasn’t what Eldra was worried about.

Maul had said on the day of Kassandra’s birth that they would have three years before the Sith master would come for her. How long did she have to prepare? How long until she would be forced to fight for her life and the life of her daughter?

And it would be just her fighting. What had happened the previous year had made it clear to her that Maul wasn’t going to help her, and she wasn’t going to change that no matter how hard she tried. But even with that knowledge, it had still been hard to keep her distance from him; to keep their bond blocked. At least Maul had made things easier by not being around much, since his master had been sending him on various mission.

(She also suspected that he was the one buying supplies like food and such, since Venny was gone, and dropping them off at the apartment. And while the thought of Maul shopping was an amusing one, it didn’t change anything.)

She sensed that Maul’s latest mission was more important than usual, suggesting that the Sith’s plans were being put into action. Meaning she didn’t have much longer.

The dread was nearly all-consuming. Eldra hadn’t felt like this since Kassandra’s birth.

Speaking of the little troublemaker, Kassandra took advantage of her mother’s distraction and suddenly yanked the datapad from her hands. “You can’t catch me!”

She ran across the room, giggling. Eldra smiled before giving chase, letting her daughter stay ahead of her.

“I’m gonna get you!”

“You can’t get me!”

“Oh no, how did you get so fast?”

The girl ended up running into a corner, and tried to retrace her steps. Eldra quickly scooped her up and blew a raspberry into her daughter’s side. Kassandra was laughing so hard that she dropped the datapad, but Eldra caught it with the Force and set it down on the table.

For a moment, Eldra let herself forget about her worries. But the moment didn’t last for very long.

Kassandra stopped laughing and went still. “Mama…”

Eldra suddenly felt it, too. A dark presence.

“Kassie, go and wait in our room,” she said, placing her daughter down. The little girl hurried across the apartment and into the room they shared, before locking the door behind her. Taking a deep breath, Eldra called her lightsaber to her hand and ignited it. When the apartment door opened, she stood ready and said, “Touch her and die.”

The Sith Lord was hunched over, his face hidden beneath a black hood. He didn’t take another step into the room. “I do not wish to harm you, Eldra Kaitis.”

“No,” she said. “You’ll just order your apprentice to dispose of me, instead.” She could barely force the words past the lump in her throat. It hurt, admitting that someone she cared about was going to be told to kill her – and that he would do it.

“It is what must be done,” he told her. “My apprentice must sacrifice you in order to give himself fully to the Sith. I cannot do it for him.”

“Then why are you here?” It was a pointless question. She already knew.

“I am here about your daughter,” he replied. “Do not worry; I’m not here to take her away yet. That will come once you are dead, and my apprentice is here to bear witness. I thought I should tell you now, so you can say your goodbyes.”

He acted like he was doing her a favour; like he wasn’t tearing her world to shreds and destroying everything she held dear. This was the man who was going to take her daughter and turn her into a twisted killing machine, just like he had done to her father. Even if Eldra managed to kill Maul, she knew that she wouldn’t be able to defeat this Sith Lord standing before her. He would kill her and take the child, anyway.

But that fact wasn’t going to stop her from trying. Eldra threw herself at the Sith, lightsaber raised. The Sith simply raised his hand and pushed her back with the Force. She hit the far wall and dropped her lightsaber, the weapon disengaging when it clattered to the floor.

When she opened her eyes, the Sith was gone. She hauled herself to her feet and hurried to her room, where Kassandra was waiting. The little girl was clutching her beloved toy wolf to her chest, trying to put on a brave face, and Eldra couldn’t be prouder. It hurt all the more, knowing what her child was going to become.

Neither of them said a word; Kassandra somehow sensed now wasn’t the time to ask questions. Eldra sat down and pulled her daughter into her arms, holding her close and rocking her back and forth. She held back her tears, trying not to let her child know just how helpless she felt.

After some time, Kassandra fell asleep. Eldra tucked her into bed and placed a kiss on her forehead, beneath the three little horns that were still growing. They were a constant reminder of who her father was, and Eldra felt her heart clutch every time she really focussed on them. Maul could be as magnificent as his child, if he only let himself.

She heard the apartment door open. Maul had returned.

Eldra straightened up. This was her last chance to get through to him. And though she knew it was pointless to even try, given what had occurred the previous year and all the realisations that had come with it, she didn’t have any other choice. Her child was about to be taken away by a monster, and said child’s father was going to let it happen. Eldra wasn’t about to roll over and die; she was going to keep fighting until it killed her.

He was standing by the window when she entered the main apartment, watching the traffic streak across the night sky. She opened her mouth to speak, but paused when she sensed the Force around him. It felt familiar, and a name came to her immediately.

“Qui-Gon.”

Maul turned to her and nodded. “I fought him on Tatooine. His Padawan was close by, but I didn’t see him. Obi-Wan Kenobi?”

Eldra nodded, and was relieved that one of her friends was alive after five years, along with his master. Unless… “Did you kill him?”

“No.”

She didn’t dare ask if it was because of her; because she had told him about the missions she’d shared with Obi-Wan and his master. Darsha’s death had proven he didn’t care about that (while she hadn’t _told_ him about Darsha before the encounter, he certainly hadn’t cared when she _had_ told him).

But the names stirred a new hope within her, and the beginnings of a plan began to form in her mind. “Your master was here, Maul. He wants to take Kassie away to begin her training.” She stepped forwards and took his hand in hers. “Don’t fight them. Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon are good men. If you tell them about me, they can help.”

Maul yanked his hand away and turned on her, yellow eyes flashing with rage. “They are my _enemies_!”

Yet he screamed those words like he was trying to convince himself of that instead of Eldra. Had he actually considered the idea, too? She couldn’t let herself hope, but pressed on.

“But they don’t _have_ to be! Your daughter is more important than this!”

It was his turn to take her hand, and he squeezed it reassuringly. “I promise, I’ll find a way to ensure he never touches her.”

And it was Eldra’s turn to yank her hand away. “Maybe you’ve convinced yourself that’s what you want, but I can’t trust you to keep that promise. You’ll never bring yourself to stand against him.”

He snarled in frustration. “He is my _master_.”

“If you want to stay here and give yourself over to the dark side, fine. Throw your life away,” said Eldra. “But you need to let us go. If you don’t, I will die and so will Kassie, because what he’ll do to her may as well be death. Please… let us _go_.”

Maul fists clenched. “So you can go running back to the _Jedi_?!”

Eldra straightened herself. “If that’s what I have to do to protect Kassie.”

A crack appeared in the wall closest to Maul, and Eldra jumped back in shock. She felt through the Force for her lightsaber and prepared herself for a fight, but Maul didn’t try to lash out at her; he didn’t destroy anything else.

“I promise,” he said, “to protect you both. But you will _never_ leave.”

Then he turned on his heel and left the apartment.

Eldra sunk to the floor, holding back her tears.

There was no time to cry. She had to think of something; _anything_. It didn’t matter if she survived or not, so long as Kassandra was safe. Glancing over at the door, she wondered how long it would take to cut through it with her lightsaber before it triggered the alarms. And she wondered how far outside the building she would be able to run before the slave chip blew her up. She would be dead, but with any luck the police would investigate the building and find Kassandra. Maybe just in case she could carry a recorded message on her, telling them specifically where to find Kassandra, while also telling them to take her to the Jedi Order, only they would have to remove the slave chip… which Kassandra didn’t have…

Her eyes widened in realisation.

Kassandra didn’t have a chip. She could leave.

\---

Even while Maul planned his attack, his thoughts kept dwelling on what Eldra had said.

In the deepest parts of his mind, he understood why she was trying to leave. It wasn’t him she was trying to escape from; it was his master, the man who wanted her dead. But he was also the man who had trained Maul for his destiny, and Maul couldn’t leave him. And he couldn’t let Eldra leave with Kassandra. It was a simple as that.

There had never been anyone like Eldra in his life; had never been anyone he’d felt this way about. And there would never be anyone like her again. Once she was gone, she was gone, and Maul couldn’t lose her. It was why he couldn’t let her leave, even with the knowledge that Sidious would order him to kill her. It had been so much easier, living in the present and pretending he wouldn’t have to do that someday.

But he’d run out of time. He couldn’t put it off for later, like he had been doing; he had to decide what to do _now_ , making it far more difficult for him to think.

He paced along the narrow catwalks and corridors of the power generator faculty, swinging his lightsaber around in order to get used to his surroundings. It was a perfect location for his inevitable duel with the Jedi, and close enough to the hanger that he could lead them there without any difficulty. Thinking about the upcoming fight helped increase his anger.

That was a thought. Maybe he could tell Sidious that Eldra and Kassandra helped him channel his emotions, just like the Sith Code told him to do. Sidious couldn’t argue if it was the way of the Sith, could he? But then Sidious would tell him that to rely on others would be weakness, something the Sith couldn’t show at any cost.

Only relying on Eldra and Kassandra didn’t make him feel weak. It made him feel strong.

The pain of not knowing what to do was getting to him, and he was relieved when the Jedi finally showed up to provide a distraction. Maul patted his chest, where he had stored the folded-up picture of his family that his pup had drawn for him over a year ago. He would draw strength from that; he would tell himself that these Jedi were going to take his family from him.

Then the doors opened and he saw them – more specifically, he saw Obi-Wan Kenobi for the first time. Eldra’s friend, filled with determination that reminded him so much of her. And he was struck once more with temptation. In his mind he pictured himself laying down his weapon, kneeling before his enemies and surrendering to them.

It felt wrong.

So, he ignited his blades, they did the same, and the duel began.

\---

Eldra spent the whole night planning.

It was a big risk, because Kassandra was so young. Though they were on the surface level on Coruscant instead of the lower levels, it was still dangerous out there. She could be snatched up by a criminal or someone corrupt, and though her Force-sensitivity would give her some level of protection, it wasn’t guaranteed.

But it was either she took the risk, or they stayed and let the Sith decide their fates. And even if Eldra herself didn’t make it out, then at least Kassandra would be safe.

She once again checked the ventilation shafts and felt a breeze blowing through them. She then found a holodisk and recorded a message onto it, making it quick. The last thing she needed was for Maul to return and walk in on her doing so. Or worse, the Sith master walking in on her.

After it was done, all she could do was wait until morning. As she watched the sunrise out the window, she found herself getting teary-eyed. Instead of trying to figure out why, she just dried her eyes and ignored how she felt sad and conflicted at the thought of escaping, instead of joyous and excited.

When her daughter was finally awake and had eaten her breakfast, Eldra brought her back into their room and crouched down to her level.

“Kassie, I need you to listen to me.” She handed over the holodisk. “We’re in danger from the bad man, and your Dad can’t help us. I’m going to send you into the ventilation shafts. You need to climb down to the bottom and get outside onto the streets. When you do, find a police droid. You know what they look like, don’t you?”

“Yes, Mama.” Kassandra was listening intently; she’d picked up through the Force that what her mother was telling her was important.

“When you find one, tell it that you need to get to the Jedi Temple,” she explained. “You’re wearing robes that make you look like a Jedi Youngling, so the police droid will think you’re from there. When you get there, tell the guards you need to speak to the Jedi Council immediately, because you have a message for them from Eldra Kaitis. When they ask for the message, give them the holodisk. Do you understand?”

She nodded. “Will I see you again, Mama?”

“Of course.” But in truth, she didn’t know. If the plan went wrong in any way, there was a chance that she would never see her daughter again. Knowing this, Eldra hugged her daughter for longer than she would normally, just in case.

Though she wanted to hold her daughter forever, she had to let her go. Eldra opened up the vent in their room and helped Kassandra inside.

“Bye, Mama. See you soon!” And then she was gone.

Eldra collapsed onto the bed and shed a single tear.

Her eyes closed. She knew she was doing the right thing. Kassandra was strong; she would find her way.

And Maul… Well, he’d made his choice. He’d given into his anger, his hate, his fear… The promise he made her was one he couldn’t keep, and she knew it. Getting away from him and his master, getting Kassandra away from them… It was the right choice. 

_Then why does it hurt so much?_


	21. Chapter Twenty: Unbroken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't remember whether I mentioned it before, but in case I haven't I'll say it again: for the most part I'm sticking to Disney canon (with some changes here and there in order to accommodate this fic), but at the same time I'll be cherry-picking stuff I like from Legends and reworking it. For example, Siri will be one of the main characters in this series, and while she's mostly the same, some bits of her story have changed, as you'll see here.

And I will fight the darkness with

all the light I have within

– “Unbroken”, _Really Slow Motion_

\---

“If you breathe a word of this to the Council-”

“And tell them what? That the esteemed Adi Gallia pigged out on a Nerf steak like she was Jabba the Hutt? They’d never believe me.” Siri stifled her laughter when Adi glared at her. It was an intimidating look – even Mace Windu was afraid of it – but Siri was immune to its effects.

The master and apprentice were approaching the Jedi Temple, having spent their lunch hour at Dex’s Diner. Days were slow in between missions, and though Siri would never admit it aloud, it was nice to spend time with her master when people weren’t shooting at them.

“They might,” said Adi. “You didn’t hear this from me, but someone saw Master Yoda returning to his quarters close to midnight with a sparklemint milkshake, slurping it so loudly it was a shock that he didn’t wake up the entire Temple.”

She tried to hold it back, but the mental image of the Grand Master drinking from a straw sent Siri into hysterics. Then she nearly fell over when she imagined someone like Mace Windu being the one to discover the sight and then going to gossip about it to the rest of the Council.

And people say the Jedi never have any fun.

When she’d finally calmed down, she said, “I think you’re both safe from any kind of scandal, Master. Gorging yourself on food doesn’t make you the next Yula Braylon.”

“I suppose that’s a fair point.” Adi gave a little shrug. “Still, it’s undignified, and Mace would never let me hear the end of it.”

Siri was about to respond to this when she felt the Force shift around her. She paused her steps and surveyed the area, looking for the source of the disturbance while she simultaneously focused on what the Force was trying to tell her. She could feel a strong presence, familiar yet not. “Master-”

“I sense it, too,” said Adi. She was scanning their surroundings, as well.

Feeling a nudge in the Force, Siri diverted her attention directly ahead, and she saw what had caused the disturbance.

A police droid was approaching the Temple’s front staircase with a Youngling by its side. All Siri could make out was that the Youngling was female, and that she was a Rutian Twi’lek. But then Siri hadn’t noticed her because of how she looked – it was the fact that the Force surrounded her in a way she hadn’t seen before.

“The Youngling,” Siri said to Adi. “I sensed her.” She exchanged a look with her master, neither of them needing to speak since they were both drawing similar conclusions. It was unlikely that this Youngling was from the Temple, which led to questions of who she was and where she came from. And while it wasn’t unusual for Coruscant’s law enforcement to deliver orphaned children to the Jedi, they usually called ahead first.

But these questions weren’t going to be answered by standing around, so Siri and Adi jogged towards the pair.

When they finally caught up, Cin Drallig had appeared and was talking to the officer. Siri paid no heed to the droid and instead focussed all of her attention on the Youngling, who looked to be three years old at most. Now that they were closer, she realised that the Youngling’s Force presence felt strikingly familiar. Not only that, but she _looked_ familiar, too, only Siri couldn’t pinpoint why. She also noticed that the Youngling wasn’t fully Twi’lek; three little horns were beginning to form at the top of her forehead. Zabrak horns, from the look of them, and she had Zabrak ears to match instead of the coned ones of female Twi’leks.

“What’s the situation here, Cin?” Adi asked.

“The police droid found this Youngling running around on her own,” said Master Drallig. “She told him to bring her to the Temple because she needed to deliver a message to the Council.”

The Youngling lifted her chin up. “Mama sent me. I will see them. I will!”

Once again, Siri was struck with a familiarity that clutched her heart. The Youngling reminded her of someone…

Adi smiled and knelt down to the girl’s level. “I am a member of the Jedi Council. What is your name, little one?”

The child hesitated at first, before replying. “Kassandra.” She then frowned, as if she was trying to remember something, and when she started speaking again her words were slow. “Mama told me I must give a message to the Jedi Council. From Eldra Kaitis.”

“Eldra!” The name of her friend escaped from Siri in shock, and she quickly tried to contain the emotions threatening to overwhelm her.

Eldra had been missing for five years, presumed dead. And Siri hadn’t even known about it for the first year, since she and Obi-Wan had been on an extended mission to Mandalore. Upon her return, Siri had wanted to find her friend and tell her all about what had happened on Mandalore; what had happened between her and Obi-Wan. Instead she’d returned to find Leora Ori dead and Eldra gone.

She’d lost both her best friends in one blow. It was unimaginable, how hard it had been to cope with the loss of Eldra while also being forced to stay away from Obi-Wan for their own good.

Hearing that Eldra might be alive…

Kassandra frowned up at her, and inquisitively asked, “You know Mama?”

And Siri felt like she’d been knocked over by a charging bantha.

It all made sense. The Youngling looked like Eldra, her presence even felt like Eldra’s own. But sometimes it was hard to believe something that was standing right there, when that something was so mind-boggling. The thought of _any_ Jedi having a child was baffling, since they were rarer than an albino Force-sensitive Wookiee. It was hard to picture Eldra being someone to break the code like this, unless she hadn’t had a choice…

Siri fell to her knees from the shock, and suddenly finding herself closer to the child, she noticed another detail for the first time. One that caused her mind to spin even faster: the swirl patterns on the child’s lekku. And she was suddenly reminded of the story Eldra had told her, about the great Kassandra Liber of Ryloth who bore the Mark of Freedom, and not only did Eldra have a daughter who bore the same mark, but she also held the same name as the legendary heroine…

There was a hand on her shoulder. Her master’s. It had a grounding affect, and Siri was able to quiet her mind and think straight. She needed to stay in the present moment. Whatever the Force was planning, there would be time to discuss it at a later date. Right now, Eldra was alive and needed their help.

Turning her attention back to the child, she said, “I was her best friend when I was about your age. And I still am, if she’s still alive. Where is she?”

“Patience, Siri.” Adi returned her gaze to the child. “Kassandra, what is your message?”

The girl brought out a holodisk from her pocket and switched it on. After flickering a few times, a hologram of Eldra appeared, and any doubts Siri had about her being Kassandra’s mother were silenced.

“I don’t have much time, so I’ll be quick,” she said. She kept looking over her shoulder, like she expected someone to walk in on her. “I’m being held against my will in an apartment on Coruscant. Kassandra will be able to lead you here. I’ve been slave-chipped. Please hurry.” The hologram cut off.

Siri rose to her full height and looked to Adi. “Master-”

“We’ll leave immediately,” she said, as she too stood upright. “Cin, inform the Council of this development. Siri, I need you to run to Medical and ask them for the deactivator wand. Officer, when we’re ready to depart, please lead us back to where you found the Youngling…”

\---

Eldra was curled up on the couch, staring out the window at the passing traffic, when she heard several loud noises outside the apartment. She glanced across the room in time to see a violet lightsaber cut through the door, disabling the lock.

Her plan had worked. There was no turning back.

The door swung open, and Eldra almost leapt with joy at the sight of one of her best friends standing on the other side with her master. And behind them, Kassandra was jumping up and down with excitement.

“Mama, I found them!” she cried. “I found the Jedi, just like you said!”

She raced into the room and barrelled into Eldra, who rose to her feet and welcomed her embrace as all the tension left her body. She hadn’t been able to relax since Kassandra had disappeared into the vents. “I’m so proud of you, Kassie.”

Kassandra, pleased with herself, jumped onto the sofa, giggling. “Hi, Wolfie!” She picked up her stuffed wolf and hugged it. “Did you miss me?”

Meanwhile Adi and Siri put away their lightsabers as they stepped into the apartment. “Is there anyone else here?” asked the former.

“No.” Eldra shook her head.

The Jedi Master nodded, before she left to do a sweep of the apartment.

Siri walked towards Eldra and her daughter, and Eldra noticed that while in some ways her friend hadn’t changed, in other ways she had. She was slightly taller, for starters, though Eldra supposed that she herself was too. Her blonde hair was longer as well, and her Padawan braid along with it. But it wasn’t really her physical characteristics that had changed. She was carrying herself differently, with less aggression and more fluidity, like she was comfortable in her own body.

Eldra realised that while Siri hadn’t changed enough to make her unrecognisable, she had still changed. And Eldra hadn’t been there to witness those changes.

The length of her captivity and the isolation from her friends hit her all at once, and tears formed in her eyes. Siri paused, and Eldra could tell that her friend had been about to make some kind of dismissive joke. But upon seeing the Twi’lek’s response to her, chose instead to cross the final distance between them and wrap her in a tight embrace. Eldra hugged her back, and for that brief moment, she didn’t want to ever let go again.

She felt a wet patch on her shoulder, but didn’t say anything.

“I hate to sound like a grandmother, but you don’t call, you don’t write…” Of course Siri still made the joke, and despite everything, Eldra smiled.

Finally pulling back, she responded with, “Maybe I just wanted to get away from that gundark before he plotted his revenge.”

The blonde Jedi laughed while she dried her eyes with the back of her sleeve. “It’s been years. Obi-Wan’s forgiven us both for dunking him in the fountain.”

“How is he?” Eldra asked, suddenly desperate for news. He’d been alive the day before, but since Maul had left again to complete his mission and his targets were Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon…

For a moment, Eldra saw something in Siri’s eyes; an emotion she couldn’t quite pinpoint before it was gone again. “He’s fine. On a mission with Qui-Gon at the moment, otherwise he would have been here alongside me, coming to rescue you.” She paused for a moment, gathering herself. “We didn’t find out that you were gone until after we came back from Mandalore. By that time, you’d been gone for almost a year, and the Council had already searched for you and were forced to presume you dead.”

Eldra sent her a reassuring smile. “I know the protocol. It’s fine.”

Siri looked out the window, and Eldra thought she was going to turn and kick something. “No, it’s not ‘fine’! You’ve been on Coruscant this whole time- Have you?”

“Yes,” said Eldra. “Not initially, but it’s a long story.”

“But you’ve been here most of the time?” At Eldra’s nod, Siri continued, “You’ve been here on the same planet as the Jedi, and no one even noticed. Granted, this whole building is surrounded by a Force-shield I didn’t even think was possible-”

“Exactly.” Eldra took her friend’s hand and squeezed it. “I’m on the other side of the planet. And it’s the last place anyone would think to look.”

“It still bugs me, but it doesn’t matter now. We’ve found you. _That’s_ what matters.” The Human sighed before she held up the deactivator wand. “Now, shall we take care of that slave chip?”

Eldra let out a shaky breath and nodded.

They sat down on the sofa. When Siri moved the deactivator wand towards her, Eldra was suddenly hit with a wave of anxiety. What if the Sith master had installed some kind of countermeasure on the chip that would cause it to kill her – and those around her – instantly if someone tried to deactivate it? She’d never heard of such a thing existing, because surely if it did then slavers all over the galaxy would be using it, but if anyone was capable of such countermeasures, it was the Sith. She was about to tell Siri to take Kassandra and remove themselves from the apartment so that she could do it herself, but then Siri started scanning her and it was too late to voice her concerns. When nothing happened for the first minute, Eldra figured that it was probably safe to continue.

Kassandra, still cuddling her wolf toy, curled up into her mother’s side, tired from the day’s events. Eldra gently stroked her daughter’s head. “I have so much to explain…”

“It can wait until we get back to the Temple,” said Siri, as she continued to scan Eldra. “Why doesn’t Kassandra have a chip?”

“I’m not sure. My only guess is she wasn’t deemed a threat. Arrogance on my captor’s part.” Eldra shrugged. “But there’s one thing that can’t wait. I know this is gonna sound crazy, but… The Sith have returned.”

Siri just kept scanning. She wasn’t shocked or disbelieving like Eldra expected she would be. Instead she simply said, “We know.”

Eldra let out a breath. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan must have told the Council after encountering Maul. “I really wanted to be the one to make that big, dramatic reveal.”

Siri snickered. “Master Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan beat you to it. They were on Tatooine when they encountered one. But Adi told me that the Council don’t really believe them.”

“Typical.” Eldra rolled their eyes. “They say arrogance is not the Jedi way, and yet…”

Siri nodded. “Yeah. Adi believes them. She’s been on enough missions with Qui-Gon to know to trust his judgement. And now you can back them up. Was it a Zabrak?”

“A Dathomirian Zabrak, yes. He’s the apprentice,” said Eldra. “I was captured so he could practise against me, and… well…” She looked down at Kassandra, who was drifting off to sleep.

Siri’s eyes widened in realisation. “Eldra, I’m sorry…”

“It wasn’t like that,” Eldra said immediately. She could accept that Maul was many things, but never _that_. “It’s… complicated.”

She could see the spark of anger in Siri’s eyes, and knew her friend was using every ounce of her training to fight it. “How is him _fathering a child_ with you _complicated_?!”

“Because he’s as much a captive of his master as I was.” Eldra sighed. “He was taken by the Sith when he was Kassandra’s age, then twisted and tortured into becoming an unstoppable killing machine. He didn’t choose the dark side; it was forced upon him. I sympathised with him to survive. It was twisted and unhealthy, but I formed a bond with him, and it frightens me that it went deeper than I wanted it to. But I won’t pretend he’s not what he is, and I won’t make excuses for him and the terrible things he’s done. So yes, it _is_ complicated.”

Siri could only stare at her friend in shock, unable to say a word. That silence was broken when the deactivator wand started beeping. Siri pressed some buttons, and just like that, Eldra was free.

There was no shock, nor did she feel any of the other emotions she expected to. Perhaps because she was still inside her prison, and needed to step outside in order to fully experience her new-found freedom.

“The healers can remove the chip completely when we get back to the Temple, to stop anyone from reactivating it,” said Siri. Then after heaving a sigh, she took her friend’s hand. “No one expects you to be perfect, Eldra. If it was every master’s duty to make the perfect Jedi, then I would’ve been kicked out of the Order years ago.”

Eldra giggled at her friend’s words. “I know. It’s just… I have no idea how I can even begin to explain it all to the Council. And I’m worried that they won’t understand.”

“They will.” Eldra and Siri turned to find that Adi had returned from her sweep. “I’m sure you know that when I was a Senior Padawan, I was tasked with a deadly undercover mission to help bring down the Krayn slave ring. I was there for years; I couldn’t drop my guard for even a second. The things I saw… The things I had to let happen… I was Knighted when the ring was finally brought down, but the experience changed me. Sometimes, in pursuit of the greater good, or even just to survive, you have to do things that may haunt you for the rest of your life. What’s important, Eldra, is that you didn’t let the darkness take you. If you wish to return to the Order, then I will make certain that you are Knighted.”

“Could you throw in a Knighting for me, too?” asked Siri, in an effort to lighten the mood. It worked; Eldra once again couldn’t help but smile at her friend.

Adi snorted. “Don’t think I don’t know about that bet the three of you are holding. I’m tempted to make sure you get Knighted last so you’re the one who has to pay up. Obi-Wan certainly deserves it after all the grief you’ve given him.”

Siri dramatically clutched at her heart. “I’m wounded, Master. How can you betray me like this?”

“Think of it as payback for all of the times you were a pest.” The Jedi Master jerked her head towards the door. “We should go. I’ve swept the entire apartment and can’t find any evidence that the Sith were even here. I definitely believe you, Eldra, but it means we have no leads on discovering their identities.”

“The Sith Master is a Human male, but that’s all I know,” said Eldra. She turned to her daughter and patted her shoulder. “Come on, Kassie. It’s time to go.”

Kassandra, who had been dosing, opened her eyes and let out a yawn. “Go where?”

“To the Jedi Temple.”

Eldra found herself faffing around instead of actually leaving. It took longer than it should have done for her to decide that she really didn’t need any of the stuff in the apartment; she could get new clothes at the Temple, and the datapad was useless (Adi took it in case she could find any information on it, but Eldra doubted there’d be any information _to_ find). Kassandra’s toys had to be left behind as well, which was fine since she wasn’t really attached to any of them except for her wolf. That they brought with them; Younglings at the Temple usually could have one toy, anyway.

That was something Eldra hadn’t really thought about. Whenever she’d imagined herself escaping, her plan had always been to go straight to the Temple, knowing that the Jedi would protect her and her daughter. It was only just hitting her that the Jedi might not even accept Kassandra for training, for a whole number of reasons.

And if the Jedi didn’t accept her, then Eldra wouldn’t stay. But that put them both in a vulnerable position. How long would it take for Maul to inevitably track them down?

“Eldra, are you ready?”

She turned back to Siri, and nodded. “Yes.”

Siri walked into the hallway outside of the apartment where Adi was already waiting. Kassandra ran out ahead of her, waving her wolf around in excitement. Eldra went to follow, but hesitated when she reached the threshold. For the first time in five years, she was going to leave the apartment.

Something she couldn’t quite name filled her. Was it dread? Excitement? She decided that it didn’t matter, and stepped out the door.

Even though she was walking through unfamiliar hallways, it didn’t really hit her that she was finally free until she was outside. Stepping out into the blinding sun, feeling the warm rays on her skin… She suddenly started laughing, and once she started, she couldn’t stop.

Adi and Siri didn’t comment, but Kassandra seemed to think it was a game and started laughing, too. Eldra wanted to scoop her up and never let her go, but didn’t want to draw attention from any onlookers.

The ride back to the Temple was mostly in silence. At least, the three adults were silent. Kassandra was talking non-stop, mostly pointing at things they passed and asking what they were, though she also talked about things she liked, her favourite food, her favourite colour, etc. When she briefly mentioned her father, Eldra found herself tensing up. That was another obstacle she would have to face.

How was she going to explain to Kassandra that her father was, to put it simply, a bad person? And that they wouldn’t be seeing him anymore?

When they finally landed in the Temple’s hanger, a small crowd had gathered. Eldra recognised some of the Council members, most notably Mace Windu and Master Yoda, but she also recognised some of her old Clan mates. Garen, Bant and Reeft were waiting towards the front of the crowd. And the moment Eldra stepped off of the transport behind Siri and Adi, the three of them surrounded her – well, it was less “surrounded” and more “pounced”, given the group hug Eldra suddenly found herself in the middle of.

They were all talking at once, and Eldra couldn’t hear what any of them were saying. Though she thought she heard Bant say, “Is that your daughter? She’s so cute!”

It was Siri who broke up the group, getting in between them and saying, “Guys, come on. Give her some space. She’s been trapped in the same four walls for five years.”

She gave Garen an especially hard shove, and the Human almost poked his tongue out at her, but refrained. Reeft and Bant were a little more sensible, although the Dressellian hid behind the Mon Calamarian out of fear of Siri’s wrath.

Eldra pulled her daughter back to her side to stop her from running off to explore, and turned to Adi. “What happens now?”

Master Windu responded instead. “For now, your situation will have to wait. We were just contacted by Obi-Wan. He has managed to slay the Dathomirian Sith on Naboo, but not before the Sith killed Qui-Gon Jinn.”

And though she didn’t show it, Eldra was hit with a wave of grief – and not all of it was for Qui-Gon. She wanted to hate herself, because she was finally free, and Maul had killed Qui-Gon in cold blood and probably tried to kill Obi-Wan.

But there was no denying the utter despair she felt from his loss. 


	22. Chapter Twenty-One: Return to Life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK, so I don't think I'm spoiling anything when I say that Maul's not really dead. xD Just thought I'd mention it in case some of my readers thought otherwise.

All my friends ask me

why I stay strong

– “Dark Paradise”, _Lana Del Rey_

\---

Eldra couldn’t sleep.

It wasn’t due to the fact that after five years sleeping in the same bed, within the same four walls, she couldn’t settle down in a different (yet familiar) setting. Though it was strange to be back in the Jedi Temple again, she had spent most of her life living there. Sinking back into the same comfortable feeling of being surrounded by so much light was easy.

No, it was the unexpected pain in her heart that had struck her the second she’d heard that Maul was dead. It was like the pain he’d felt upon being killed had been stretched out and was hitting her repeatedly, unrelenting. Which shouldn’t be possible, since she had blocked their bond, but stranger things had happened.

She didn’t dare unblock it. Horror stories telling of what happened to Jedi when their Force bonds were broken by death warned her that any attempt to reach out and see if it was still there would gain her nothing but pain. And considering the pain she was already in, she didn’t need any more.

Staring up at the ceiling, Eldra couldn’t help the feelings of frustration and anger creep up on her. The Twi’lek caressed the scar on her arm, left behind after the healers had removed the slave chip. She was finally free, and she should feel joyful at that, but no such emotions came. Instead she not only felt awful, but lonely. Which shouldn’t be possible, since she was once again surrounded by her friends. But then while they were there for her, they didn’t really understand what she’d been through.

Only one person truly did, and he was gone.

Eldra wanted to hit her pillow over and over until she cried. How terrible was that, for her to miss the man who had quite possibly been about to kill her on his master’s orders and let said master take their child away? How could she still long for him when he’d killed people she knew – including the master of one of her best friends?

Because of him, she would never see Qui-Gon Jinn ever again. Her last memory of him would be seeing him die in her dream, and boy, had _that_ come true in the worst way.

She hadn’t thought of that dream in so long. The crying bundle must have been Kassandra, only Maul hadn’t saved her and had instead almost doomed her to a horrific life as a Sith assassin.

And there was also the detail about Obi-Wan and Siri. After the Council had left for Naboo and Eldra had started to settle in, Siri had sat her down and told her everything about their mission to Mandalore – and how the mutual feelings she’d developed for Obi-Wan had almost ruined everything. Eldra hadn’t been sure what to say to her, but had provided the appropriate comfort.

There had been a relationship, but no child. Eldra wondered if there would be one day. But then there were other parts of the dream that she knew would never come true…

Giving up on sleep altogether, Eldra sat upright. She was careful not to disturb Kassandra, who slept beside her in the bed, hugging her stuffed wolf close. Eldra was grateful that the Jedi had allowed her daughter to sleep in the same quarters, instead of sending her to stay with the other Younglings in one of the crèches.

That was another thing to think about: Kassandra’s future. She already had no idea how she was going to explain to her daughter that Maul was dead, but another dark thought worried her more. She got out of bed and walked over to the window, which was larger than the one she used to have in her old Padawan quarters. The passing traffic zooming across the night sky was no different than the view from Maul’s apartment, but the familiarity helped settle her mind.

With Maul gone, his master was bound to be looking for a new apprentice. And Kassandra would be the perfect candidate.

If the Jedi refused to accept her for training, then she would be helpless. The Sith would swoop in and take her without a second thought, and Eldra knew she wouldn’t be able to do anything to stop him.

She had to make sure her daughter stayed in the Temple. Even if she herself had to step away from the Jedi Order, if that was what it took.

“Mama?”

Eldra turned to find her daughter sat up in bed, rubbing her eyes. “Go back to sleep, Kassie. It’s still night time.”

“Where’s Da? Is he coming to live with us here, too?”

And how could she answer that question? Kassandra was still so young; too young to really understand what death was. Eldra still hadn’t told her what really happened to Venny. Her daughter believed that the droid had gone away to live with his family.

It was a mercy that children didn’t remember much from their earlier years. Hopefully, Kassandra would have very few memories of her father, if any at all.

“He’s… away,” she said finally. “I’m sure he’ll be back soon.”

Kassandra frowned. It was as if she knew that wasn’t true. But she didn’t argue, and instead asked, “Can you tell me a story?”

Figuring that it would provide both of them with a distraction, Eldra nodded and sat beside her daughter, stroking her head. “Have I ever told you about the woman you were named after?” Kassandra shook her head. “Well, once upon a time…”

\---

The cascading water of the Room of a Thousand Fountains echoed around them as Obi-Wan and Anakin walked along the path, the former showing the latter around. After everything he’d been through over the past few days, the newly knighted Jedi found comfort in what had been his master’s favourite room.

It was hard, facing the reality that Qui-Gon was gone. So much had changed; not only was his master one with the Force, but Obi-Wan had found himself with an unexpected apprentice, far sooner than he would have liked. He had always planned on getting used to being a Knight without anyone to guide him before taking on a Padawan of his own.

And yet, Anakin’s presence actually helped him process his grief for Qui-Gon. It gave him something else to focus on, for starters. But the boy was also grieving for the master he might have had, and helping him with this struggle helped Obi-Wan, too. How must it be for him, to be far away from his mother, in an unfamiliar setting and surrounded by complete strangers?

If it frightened him, he didn’t show it. In fact, Anakin seemed to be taking it all in his stride, which bode well for the Jedi Knight he would one day become.

“This place reminds me of Naboo,” he said. “There’s so much water.”

Obi-Wan had to agree. It was like the room had been almost modelled after the scenery on Naboo. “This is where Jedi come to meditate. And socialise. My friends should be here to meet with us.”

“Your friends?”

Just as Anakin asked the question, Obi-Wan spotted the familiar faces he was looking for. He pointed them out, and tried to hide just how overwhelmed he was to see one of them. It was a face he never thought he’d see again.

When the Council had arrived on Naboo with news that Eldra was alive, Obi-Wan had barely believed what he was hearing. He had mourned for her and moved on, because that was what a Jedi did, but what was one supposed to do when faced with someone who had been mourned for? Looking at Eldra was like looking at a ghost.

But that wasn’t the only reason why he was conflicted.

As he and Anakin made their way over to the trio gathered on a beach area next to one of the room’s larger pools, Obi-Wan saw the child for the first time. Her trousers were rolled up and she was paddling in the shallows of the pool, laughing and splashing. Siri had been right in their conversation over the comm; this girl looked almost exactly like Eldra. The only differences were the ears… and the three familiar horns on her forehead.

Not only had Eldra been abducted by the Sith, but she’d had a child with one of them. The very same one Obi-Wan had cut in half and sent hurtling to his death. Which wouldn’t be so bad if the Sith had forced himself upon Eldra, but Siri had insisted that according to their mutual friend, it was more complicated than that. Eldra had actually _bonded_ with the Sith, if only for her own survival.

Nevertheless, Obi-Wan had killed the father of his best friend’s child. And even though that same father had killed Qui-Gon and then tried to kill him, he couldn’t help but feel guilty over the entire ordeal.

It was Siri who noticed them first, and her face lit up in a way that briefly made his heart leap. He quickly supressed it. Time apart had helped him push down the feelings he held for her, but they hadn’t gone away. Obi-Wan knew deep down, they never would. He would just have to live with them. But their refusal to talk about it with each other meant that he had no idea if Siri was in the same boat as him.

“Oh, look what the Tooka dragged in,” she said, smirking, as she sat up straighter from her position on the sand. “And what time do we call this?”

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. “For your information, I’ve been showing my new Padawan around the Temple.”

Anakin gave a shy wave. “Hi.”

Siri’s face softened when she saw him, reminding Obi-Wan how good she was with children; something that had once come as a surprise to him. She climbed to her feet and smiled at the boy. “Hello. You must be Anakin Skywalker. I’m Siri Tachi. I was your master’s best friend when we were growing up.”

“If by ‘best friend’ you mean ‘frequent tormentor’, then yes,” said Obi-Wan.

“Don’t make me push you in there again.” Siri pointed to the pool.

“And now she has help.” Eldra also got to her feet and brushed off the sand from her clothes, before turning to look at Anakin. “I’m Eldra Kaitis. I was his friend, too.” She made no move to give Obi-Wan any sort of greeting, so he took the initiative to cross the space between them and embrace her.

The Twi’lek tensed up, but only for a moment before she relaxed.

When they both pulled back, Obi-Wan saw that they’d been joined by Eldra’s daughter. Kassandra? He was certain that was what Siri had told him the child’s name was. (Which had been followed by a long speech about how she had those marks on her lekku that Eldra had never shut up about, leading to something about what kind of deep poodoo they must all be in for not only this mark to show up again but also for the kriffing Chosen One to appear, but Obi-Wan had still been in shock over Eldra’s return and the revelation that she had a child _at all_ , let alone that a Sith was the father, so he hadn’t really been listening.)

He smiled down at the child. “Hello. You must be Kassandra?”

She gasped and hid behind her mother’s legs, clutching the woman’s trousers as she buried her face from view.

Eldra placed her hand on her daughter’s head. (Obi-Wan noticed that unlike most Twi’lek children, Kassandra wasn’t wearing a headdress. Though he could see why; they would have to get one specially made to fit around her horns.) “It’s OK, Kassie. Obi-Wan’s my friend, like Siri.”

“She wasn’t like this when she met me and Adi,” said Siri.

“I think it’s because I gave her a mission,” said Eldra. “And she put on a brave face and did everything she could to complete it like a champ. But the truth is, she’s only known four walls and three people: me, her father and a droid. Everything’s changed, and I think she’s struggling to come to terms with it all. She’s tired, and… and she just wants her dad.” As she said this, Kassandra moved her head slightly so one blue eye was curiously looking at Obi-Wan.

And that just made him feel worse. Even though the Youngling was acting shy around him, she didn’t seem to hate him and could even grow to like him… all without the knowledge that he was the man who had taken her father from her. How was he supposed to react to her, when he had essentially destroyed her entire world and she had no idea?

Siri broke through his stormy mind by saying, “Poor little thing.”

Eldra looked between her two friends, silently making a decision. She then knelt down in front of her daughter and said, “Kassie, I need you to go and play for a bit longer while I talk with my friends, OK?”

Kassandra gripped her mother’s hand tightly. “Do you have to?”

“I can watch her.” Anakin chose to speak up for the first time. Until that moment he’d been a silent observer, staying close to Obi-Wan out of uncertainty. Surrounded by so many unfamiliar faces, he looked almost stressed, though Obi-Wan supposed the environment also didn’t help. After all, this was a boy who until a few days ago had never left his home planet.

Obi-Wan realised that Anakin must have felt this way since the moment he left Tatooine, and he simply hadn’t noticed. He told himself that he was going to make certain that Anakin not only felt welcome, but that he felt comfortable in his new home.

“Are you sure?” Eldra asked, looking uncertain. “She’s a handful when she gets excited.”

The girl turned and noticed the older boy for the first time, and her eyes seemed to light up. It became apparent immediately that this was a girl who had spent the first few years of her life without the company of another child. She jumped away from her mother, filled with excitement, but a moment later she froze in hesitation.

Anakin sent her a warm smile, before turning back to Eldra and saying, “I’m used to it. My mom used to help look after kids who were separated from their parents during slave drives. That’s how I became friends with Kitster; his mom and dad were sold to Jabba the Hutt, but he had to stay behind. Mom helped Kitster adjust, and I helped, too. Were you both slaves?”

It was hard, trying to dodge the uncomfortable feelings that came with the reminder that Anakin had been a slave (and that they had been forced to leave his mother behind, still in slavery, along with the other slaves on Tatooine). But looking at Eldra, Obi-Wan could see that she was having a harder time answering his question. Not because she didn’t know the answer; she had been a slave of the Sith, as had her daughter, and she knew it. She was simply finding the whole ordeal hard to talk about.

“Yes,” she said at last. “We were slaves.”

The young boy nodded like the answer was normal (like _slavery_ was _normal_ ) before he turned to the younger girl and said, “Come on, Kass! Let’s go play!” He moved closer to the water and beckoned for the three-year-old to follow him.

Kassandra continued to hesitate, and she looked up to her mother for guidance. Eldra nodded with a smile, and made an encouraging motion towards the water. With that reassurance, the thrill of playing with another child overpowered the girl’s need to stay close to her mother, and she hurried after Anakin.

When the pair were out of earshot, paddling in the shallows of the pool, Obi-Wan turned back to Eldra. “I feel I should apologise. I’ve taken away your child’s father-”

Eldra interrupted him with a raised finger before he could get another word out. “Let me get one thing straight: _never_ apologise for doing the right thing. Maul killed Qui-Gon, and he was trying to kill you. If anything, _I_ should be the one apologising to _you_. The father of my child killed your master-”

“You were being held against your will,” said Obi-Wan. “And it’s not like you told him to kill Qui-Gon.”

She sighed. “I know. But it doesn’t change the fact that three Jedi are dead, and I couldn’t do anything to stop him.”

Obi-Wan frowned. “Wait, three?”

“Darsha and her master,” said Eldra. “That’s how they really died: Maul killed them. I told the Council before they left.”

“And she told me yesterday,” said Siri. “Pretty scary, right? Realising that the Sith have been around all this time. How many other Jedi have they managed to kill, and we never knew about it?”

It was a frightening prospect, Obi-Wan realised. And getting some answers behind Darsha’s death helped close a door he didn’t realise was still open. They hadn’t been close, but they’d been friends – like he’d been friends with most of the children in his Clan – and the nature of her death and how it had gone unsolved had bothered him.

“Anoon Bondara was the Temple’s Battlemaster,” Eldra continued. “And Maul killed him. He only got that good because… because he was training against me. When I first faced him in battle, I nearly killed him. So he used me to become a better fighter. And… and I actually _enjoyed_ sparring against him. He was a challenge, and I appreciated that’s all he wanted me for instead of what people usually want Twi’lek slave girls for, and I _knew_ he was going to go on and kill people I cared about, but it never really hit me until he killed Darsha, and…”

It didn’t take an idiot to know that Eldra was talking herself into a dark place, fuelled by guilt she’d convinced herself she deserved to feel. Obi-Wan strode forwards, and Siri wasn’t far behind him. They took a hand each, grounding her in the present.

“Eldra, listen to me,” Obi-Wan said. “Qui-Gon’s death isn’t your fault. I don’t blame you. The only person I blame is the man who struck him down. In case I need to repeat myself: you didn’t tell him to kill my master.”

“I tried to stop him,” she said. “When he told me he’d encountered you both, I tried to convince him not to kill you. He didn’t listen.”

“Then that was his choice.” Obi-Wan squeezed her hand reassuringly. “You tried.”

“And Eldra, I think you should go and talk to Bant,” Siri told her gently. “Since you’ve been gone, she’s been training to join the Medical Corps and has become especially skilled in healing ailments of the mind. It’s up to you, but I think she can help.”

Their friend just looked at their joined hands for a long moment, before sighing again. “I’ll think about it. First, I need to get through telling the Council the whole story. I gave them a brief summary before they left for Naboo, but I left out a lot of stuff that’s hard to explain. Like, how do I even _begin_ to tell them that I… that I did things a Jedi should never do with _anyone_ , let alone a Sith Lord.”

She glanced over at Kassandra, and it was clear what she meant when she said “things”.

“Remember what my master told you,” said Siri. “Sometimes to survive, a Jedi must do things that leave a scar on our souls.”

“Like deprive a child of her father.” Obi-Wan nodded towards Kassandra.

Eldra rolled her eyes and looked more like herself again. “Seriously, Obi-Wan. You did the right thing. And I think… it’s for the best that he’s gone. I was worried we’d have to deal with him storming the Temple and slaughtering any Jedi who got in his way. At the end of the day, he… he cared for us in his own way, but the darkness was clouding his mind, and it destroyed him. He wasn’t exactly dad material.”

A commlink started beeping. It was Siri’s.

She stepped back to answer it, letting go of Eldra’s hand. “Yes, Master?”

“ _Siri, could you send Eldra to the Council chambers?_ ” said Adi over the comm. “ _Tell her to come alone, if you don’t mind watching over her daughter._ ”

“Sure. I’ll send her up.” She looked to the Twi’lek. “It’s time to face the party poopers.”

“ _I heard that_.” There was a chuckle in the background which sounded like it belonged to Master Plo Koon, before Adi cut the connection.

Eldra let go of Obi-Wan’s hand, then took in a deep breath as she mentally prepared herself for what was about to come. “OK. Wish me luck. And if you say there’s no such thing as luck-”

Obi-Wan raised his hands in defence. “I wasn’t going to say that!”

“It’s only bee five years. You haven’t changed _that_ much.” She then walked towards where Kassandra was splashing in the water with Anakin, and Obi-Wan watched as she explained to her daughter that she needed to go and do something important; that Kassandra needed to stay with Obi-Wan, Siri and Anakin for the time being.

Though she had assured him that he’d done the right thing, Obi-Wan still couldn’t help but feel responsible for the child. Perhaps he was being hypocritical, given he’d just told Eldra not to feel guilty over things that were out of her control, but the fact remained that he had taken this girl’s father away. Even if it had been the right thing to do.

Maybe there was a way he could make it up to her. She would be ready for training in another ten years or more, and if all went well (and he progressed at a far quicker pace than Obi-Wan himself) then Anakin would be ready to take the Trials of Knighthood around the same time. Leaving Obi-Wan free to take another Padawan.

He doubted that even if they both stayed, Eldra wouldn’t be allowed to train Kassandra herself. Which meant the girl would need someone else to oversee her training.

Though she didn’t yet know it, this Youngling had lost her father – and if the Force willed it, Obi-Wan was prepared to step in and fill the gap he himself had cut out. It was the least he could do. 


	23. Chapter Twenty-Two: Burden of Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone who hasn't figured it out/noticed, this story is the first in a series. I'm working on the next one now, but I'm not sure if it'll be ready by the time I post this story's last chapter. I won't keep you guys waiting too long for it, though.

I wish I could say that was the last time,

I said that last time, it became a pastime

– “Say No to This”, _Hamilton on Broadway_

\---

As she waited outside the Council chambers, Eldra pushed down the fresh memory of Kassandra clinging to her sleeve, desperately pleading for her not to go. And while she knew she would see her daughter again, she couldn’t help but think of it as a premonition of what was to come.

Because she had a feeling that in order to keep Kassandra in the Temple, she would have to either walk away from the Jedi, or if she was allowed to stay, cut all contact with her daughter. The rules of the Order were clear: they weren’t allowed to form attachments, be they romantic or familial. No exceptions. And Eldra doubted her special circumstances would grant her one.

But that was, honestly, the best-case scenario. It was a better option than Kassandra not being accepted at all, which would lead to them both becoming easy pickings for the Sith Lord who still lived.

It was one of the reasons why she was considering lying to the Council in her report. If she made herself out to be the victim with no choice in the matter, then there was a chance that the Council would take pity on her and accept Kassandra for training in response. And yet, she couldn’t bring herself to lie; to ignore the few good qualities Maul had and paint him as an irredeemable villain like his master. Even after all of the terrible things he’d done, she was unwilling to throw him to the wolves.

She remembered what Adi Gallia had told her, before entering the chambers.

Twelve pairs of eyes watched her walk into the centre of the room, and Eldra felt every single one of them. The only gaze she could meet was Adi’s, and after a moment, Yoda’s. She found it inconceivable for the Grand Master of the Order to be judgemental of anyone.

“Greetings, Masters,” she said.

“Padawan Kaitis,” Master Windu began, “you have been summoned here to give a full report of your experiences as the Sith’s captive. You are to treat this meeting as a standard mission report, so we request that you leave nothing out.”

“We understand that this may be hard for you to discuss,” said Adi. “And be assured that what you tell us will be judged impartially. Everyone in this room has done things we are not proud of, whether it be for our own survival or for the good of the Republic.”

The Jedi Master’s words brought Eldra some reassurance. But no matter what the other masters had done, none of them had dealt with a Sith Lord before. She had laid with the Jedi’s greatest enemy, and willingly. She would be a fool to think they would let that slide so easily.

Ki-Adi-Mundi spoke next. “We do not mean to pressure you, Eldra, but whatever you can tell us about the Sith is important in our investigations into their sudden return. The apartment was raided by law enforcement after you and your daughter were liberated, but they could find no records or any other evidence that would lead us to the remaining Sith Lord’s identity.”

“I will tell you what I can,” said Eldra.

“Begin, you may,” said Yoda, nodding his head.

Eldra closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. There was a lot to unload, and she needed to keep her emotions under control in the face of the High Council. After a moment’s pause, she began.

First, she told them about the transport crash and her subsequent capture by Xev Xrexus. Barring the death of her master, that whole incident was by far the easiest part of the story to discuss. Things back then had been simple; straightforward. It almost felt like a lifetime ago, when in reality it had only been five years.

“The Jedi we sent to investigate your disappearance discovered the wreckage of the transport vessel,” Plo Koon told her. “The body of Master Ori was brought back to the Temple, where she received a proper funeral.”

“May the Force be with her,” said Eldra, while in her mind she made a note to visit her master’s coffin chamber when the meeting was over.

With the easy part over, she told the Council about her first encounter with Maul, which had led to her capture. She told them what her purpose had been, how there had been no escape, how she’d lived every day in fear that it would be her last. But she also told them about the good parts; where Maul had shown his more honourable side, how he kept her fed and never hurt her like she thought he would. She was honest in saying that while she was being held against her will, things could have been a lot worse, and this mantra had kept her alive.

Because at the end of the day, Maul had treated her like she was someone of worth, even if it was merely a worthy opponent. Which was far better treatment than what she would have received from most of the participants at the auction.

When she mentioned her plan to try and reason and sympathise with him – with the goal that he would eventually let her go – this gained a few surprised glances, which she understood. The thought that any Sith could be reasoned with went against everything they’d learned about their enemy and the dark side in general.

“How could such a thing be possible?” Depa Billaba asked, not to her specifically though. She sounded more curious than anything. “Once the dark side consumes you, there is no turning back.”

“And you are right,” Eldra told her. Because while Maul had cared, he had ultimately chosen the dark side over her and their child, even if he hadn’t admitted to it. “But that doesn’t mean there isn’t still some good left in you, once you turn. I used to think that the Sith were nothing more than irredeemable monsters. Maul’s master certainly lived up to that image. But Maul himself… He was complicated. I suppose in a way, he was like us, just on the other end of the spectrum. Most people think the Jedi are empty paragons of morality, when in reality we’re all people, too. We have senses of humour, we have good days and bad days, we make mistakes sometimes. Maul was like that; deeply devoted to the Sith, but that wasn’t all he was. He was also conflicted, like he wanted to question what he was being taught but was too afraid of standing up to his master. He was driven by emotion, but not just negative emotions like anger and hate. He was driven by positive emotions, too. And I soon discovered that deep down, he was just a lonely boy desperate to latch onto the first thing to show him any form of kindness – which ended up being me.”

This led to her explaining his backstory; how he’d had the dark side forced upon him instead of choosing it himself, how his master had tortured him from childhood and twisted his mind into believing that the way of the Sith was the only way. He was basically a captive just like her, only he’d been raised to believe that the Sith were his destiny, and he was meant to be there. And this led to her explaining how, when she’d confronted him about this, Maul had lashed out and touched her mind, while she’d touched his, accidentally creating a Force bond.

This caught the attention of several of the masters. Force bonds were rare, and usually never ended well. But apart from a few glances, they didn’t otherwise react, which gave Eldra the courage to continue. She knew what happened next would be the hardest part of the story to tell. But then Mace Windu had asked her to be honest, and she supposed that applied to her nerves and how she thought they would react.

So, with her head lowered slightly, Eldra continued. Explained the tentative friendship that formed between them, explained how she had let the bond grow in order to survive. She tried to make herself sound like a droid, speaking with no emotion, but the closer she got to the more awkward parts of her story, the more it showed. She stuttered and struggled to hide her distress. It was hard to look any of the masters in the eye, out of fear of the judgement she would see, so instead she kept her gaze averted to the floor.

As she explained how things had developed – the first time they kissed, and then taking it further some weeks later – she found herself making all sorts of excuses. Saying she let it get so far in order to survive, saying it was because she liked how he had initiated it not out of lust but because he liked the sort of person she was on the inside… And she also mentioned the dream; how it had shown her the two of them together, which she had interpreted as the Force giving her permission to do the unthinkable. In order to back it up, she explained how the same dream had given her a vision of Qui-Gon dying, impaled by a red lightsaber.

Recalling what else she’d seen, she turned to Adi and said, “I saw you die, too, Master Gallia. You were in a hallway on a ship, being shot at, but I couldn’t see who was shooting.”

“I shall keep that in mind,” said Adi. And Eldra knew she would; if the premonition about Qui-Gon had come true, then there was a good chance the dream could be right about her. Hopefully she would save one friend’s master where she couldn’t save the other’s. “You may continue.”

And continue she did, almost babbling as she tried to talk herself out of the situation she’d found herself in. Because the whole thing was just _awkward_ , and she wanted it over and done with as quickly as possible.

She mentioned how she had constantly been assuring herself she didn’t have Tyrena Syndrome; told them that she always knew Maul and his master were a threat, never tried to rationalise his actions in a positive light, and swore on her life she would have tried to escape the first chance she got. Which she had. But _not_ having a supposed mental disorder almost made it _worse_ , because it meant she had done all of this with Maul while in a rational state of mind.

But she kept going. Explained how the Sith master had been the one to tell her she was pregnant, how he’d wanted the child so he could train her as an assassin, explained how Maul refused to let her leave because he wanted her with him and wanted to be a Sith, thinking he could have both…

The rest of the story was a blur. Because while she was talking, Eldra was getting the chance to truly reflect on what had happened. She had been so focussed on just surviving and raising her daughter that she’d never had the time to really think about her situation.

And there was only one word she could use to sum it all up: horrible.

Even when she considered the good parts, the entire ordeal overall was messed up, and she was lucky to have not only escaped with her life, but with her daughter’s life, too. And though she made a point to tell the Council about Maul’s better qualities (it was the truth, after all), even going as far as to admit that she probably wouldn’t have survived without him (by which she meant that if the apprentice had been someone just as vile as the Sith master, she probably would have killed herself after the first week), looking back on the whole situation gave her a better perspective of it.

Perhaps Maul had loved her in his own way, but it was the obsessive, unhealthy kind of love. The kind that forced a person to stay even if staying would kill them. And even then, he hadn’t loved her or their daughter enough in order to give up his life as a Sith.

And it hurt. It hurt that she hadn’t been enough for him; hurt that their daughter hadn’t been enough. She felt her anger build at this, but she quickly pushed it down again. That was the last thing she needed, getting angry in front of the Council – and over a Sith Lord she may or may not have feelings for, at that.

She knew that no matter what happened – whether or not Kassandra would be trained, whether or not she would be allowed to stay in the Temple – she needed to accept that despite what he’d made her feel, what had happened with Maul had been a terrible ordeal. The only way forward was to put it behind her and move on with her life.

Eldra summed up the rest of her pregnancy and Kassandra’s early life as quickly and as best she could. But when she reached the part regarding Lorn Pavan, she couldn’t help but pause. Because she needed answers about the unfairness of his situation.

“I’m sorry, Masters,” she said, “and excuse my language, but the seeker you sent to his family screwed up spectacularly. They didn’t tell Lorn anything about what would happen should he allow his son to be trained – namely, they didn’t tell him he would be fired from his job.”

“Lorn Pavan had worked in the Temple for years,” said Master Windu. “He should have known about our rule regarding emotional attachments.”

“But you still should have asked him if he was aware,” said Eldra. “And even if he was, he might have just assumed his son would be kept away from where he was working. No one outright told him ‘Oh, by the way, if you let us train your son, we’ll have to fire you from your job’. The whole thing stinks of a political set-up, which isn’t what the Jedi Order stands for. We’re not the Senate. It’s like the seeker knew Lorn would say no if he had all the facts, so just told him what he wanted to hear so he’d hand over his son, and then threw back the ‘no returns, no refunds’ policy when he realised he’d been screwed over. Lorn lost his son, lost his job and then lost his wife in one blow. His whole life was destroyed because of the Order, and he got so desperate that he was willing to get between a dangerous Sith Lord and his child just because there may have been a slight chance he’d get his son back. Seriously, if this is how the Jedi Order are collecting their members, by practically kidnapping children under false pretences, then we’re no better than the Sith.”

The room was silent, and Eldra found she’d gained the courage to meet the gazes of several of the masters. She noticed that Adi, Depa Billaba and Plo Koon had the decency to look shocked and regretful of what had transpired. Both Master Yoda and Master Yaddle had lowered their heads, like they were ashamed of the behaviour of one of their seekers. The remaining masters showed no emotion whatsoever, but that wasn’t surprising. The members of the High Council weren’t exactly known for being easy to read.

With that out of the way, Eldra finished her story and awaited a response.

Master Windu spoke first. “What of the Sith master? Is there any way you could identify him? Or did you notice any clues that could lead us to his identity?”

“No.” Eldra shook her head. “He only visited me twice, and always wore a hood to conceal his identity. And Maul hardly spoke of him out of fear. All I know is that he’s a Human male.”

“Cunning, this Sith Lord is,” said Yoda. He stroked his chin, deep in thought. “But a matter for another time, that is. Trained as a Jedi, you wish your daughter to be.”

Eldra nodded. “Yes. I know what I’m asking of you all, but I feel this is the right place for her.”

“There is the matter of attachment,” said Master Windu. “Having your daughter so close could compromise the both of you.”

“Not to mention, who her father was poses another problem,” Ki-Adi-Mundi added. “There could be darkness within her.”

“But if there’s one thing I’ve learnt from all this, is that evil isn’t born, it’s taught. Maul’s darkness came from how he was raised,” Eldra argued. “The remaining Sith Lord knows about her existence, and he will be searching for a new apprentice. If you don’t accept her, then there’s a good chance he’ll take her. Will you be willing to condemn her to that life, out of a fear that may not even happen? If you’re so concerned about us being under the same roof, then I’m willing to give up my place in the Jedi Order if it means you’ll train her. Or if I can stay as well, then… then I’m fully prepared to break all contact with her.”

Adi locked their gazes. “Are you certain that’s what you wish to do? We’re not stopping you from leaving. You can raise her yourself; be part of her life.”

Eldra sighed. “This isn’t about what I want. It’s about protecting her.”

The Masters exchanged glances.

Yoda looked thoughtful. “Assess your daughter, we must. Send her to us, if you please. Then, discuss the matter, we will.”

It was the best answer she was going to receive, at this moment in time. Eldra bowed and left the chambers.

She didn’t start shaking until she was halfway to the Room of a Thousand Fountains. 


	24. Chapter Twenty-Three: Eternal Courage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just the epilogue left after this chapter. Enjoy!

You’re gonna grow and have a good life,

I’m gonna do what I’ve got to do

– “Rockabye”, _Clean Bandit (Feat. Sean Paul and Anne-Marie)_

\---

“How are you?”

They were both sitting on the sand watching Kassandra and Anakin playing in the water when Obi-Wan asked the question. Siri turned to face her old friend, noticing not for the first time how he seemed to have aged half a decade overnight. She’d caught a glimpse of him a few days ago when he’d returned to the Temple with Qui-Gon and Anakin in tow, and he had looked as young and boyish as ever.

It wasn’t like it was a mystery as to why he suddenly seemed more grown up. He’d stood helpless and watched a Sith Lord gut his master in front of him – a Sith Lord he’d later learned had not only been holding his friend hostage, but had fathered a child with said friend – and had then accepted the responsibility of training and raising a child, even though he knew he was most likely not ready for it. All without complaint.

No matter what life threw at him, he always picked himself back up again and carried on like the rock that had hit him had only been a feather. It was one of the things she admired about him. And loved about him.

She would always love him. The Jedi had separated them with the hope that their love would die, and Siri had buried it deep to make it look like their actions had worked, but she knew a love like that couldn’t be destroyed. She loved him, and she had learned to live with it.

Then after four years without contact, they’d reconnected over the comms, sharing their mutual joy that Eldra had returned to them. And Siri had offered her condolences and support over Qui-Gon; had asked how he was doing, how he was coping.

When he spoke, she realised she hadn’t given him much of an update on her own life.

“Fine,” she said after a pause. “It’s been pretty slow, honestly. But we did visit a JSC division last year. They were helping out on a farm on Alderaan, and I saw a certain white-haired failed Initiate cleaning up nerf poop. If looks could kill…”

Obi-Wan chuckled. “I haven’t thought about Bruck Chun in years.”

Siri guessed this was because his early years of bullying and torment at the hands of that boy had long since been overshadowed by the first day she’d met him. She had taken one look at Obi-Wan’s crestfallen face after Bruck had called “Oafy-Wan Kenoafy” a weakling and a failure as a Jedi, and had proceeded to beat the snot out of the white-haired Initiate with Eldra cheering her on, all the while screaming, “Do you want some more?!” in his ear.

(What made the whole situation funnier was that Bruck had been attempting to _impress_ her, the girl he thought was nothing more than a pretty blonde Initiate. To say that the plan had backfired spectacularly would be an understatement.)

The result: Siri had proved by fighting prowess that she needed to be in a higher Clan, and was moved up along with Eldra. And Bruck Chun never dared to say a word to Obi-Wan again out of sheer self-preservation.

“He’s not worth your memories,” she told him. “I still don’t think he’s figured out the irony of being forced into the Service Corps after being adamant for years that’s where _you_ would end up.”

Her friend pretended to think. “Maybe I should stop by for a visit. Catch him up on my newly knighted status and introduce him to my new Padawan.”

Siri laughed out loud.

Before more could be said between them, Eldra appeared from around the corner. She looked slightly pale and was staring straight ahead of her at nothing in particular. It wasn’t until Kassandra gave a happy cry and barrelled into her that Eldra snapped out of it and returned her daughter’s embrace.

“Are you alright, Eldra?” Siri asked, walking towards her with Obi-Wan by her side. Anakin joined them at a slower pace, sticking close to his master.

Eldra sighed. “I’ve never been so embarrassed in my life.”

“Surely it wasn’t _that_ bad,” said Siri. “The High Council can be stuffy, but that’s never bothered you before.”

Kassandra was looking between them the way any three-year-old would, with no understanding as to what was being talked about. The Twi’lek women looked down at her daughter and covered her ears. Obi-Wan immediately picked up on this and did the same to Anakin, allowing Eldra to say, “I had to try explaining to them why I thought it was a good idea to have an affair with a Sith Lord.”

Obi-Wan and Siri both winced. “And I thought _I_ was embarrassed whenever I had to put up with Qui-Gon backtalking them,” said the former, while removing his hand from his Padawan’s ears.

“If you get knighted after going through that,” said the latter, “then I won’t even be mad about losing the bet to you two.”

“Good to know.” Eldra gave her friend a little smile, and Siri vowed to herself to try and make her smile whenever she could. The Twi’lek desperately needed it, after everything she’d been through. “Besides, I don’t even know if I’ll be knighted _at all_. They might kick me out, or I may have to leave so they can…” She stroked Kassandra’s head, and it was clear to Siri what she was referring to.

Siri wished she could help in some way, but the whole situation was out of her hands. Adi had assured her that she would try and convince the Council to find some form of compromise, but then the twelve Masters were notoriously stubborn. Which had been funny when they went head-to-head with the equally stubborn Qui-Gon Jinn, but in situations like this…

If Eldra and her daughter were both rejected, Siri was tempted to leave the Order herself and go with them. If only to provide extra protection against this Sith Lord, while also standing with her friend.

“Are they discussing the matter now?” asked Obi-Wan.

“They’ve agreed to assess Kassie’s abilities before they make any kind of decision,” Eldra replied. “I need to bring her up there now.” She took her daughter’s hand and said to her, “Say goodbye, Kassie.”

The little girl appeared to have come out of her shell, if only a little bit, and waved to the three of them. She even managed to make eye-contact with Anakin and said, “Bye, Ani.”

“See you later, Kass.” Anakin smiled in return.

Obi-Wan led his Padawan away to continue the rest of their tour of the Temple. Before Eldra and Kassandra started walking in the opposite direction, Siri found herself saying, “I don’t know if this will help, but you might be remembered as the next Bastila Shan.”

Eldra turned back to her, frowning. “You know, in all of my time there, I never thought about Bastila.”

“Yeah, well, you always preferred that story about Kassandra Liber.”

Her friend shrugged. “I suppose. But I wouldn’t be surprised if the Council bury this story. And if they do, then maybe it’s for the best.”

She turned and walked away, her daughter by her side. And as Siri watched her go, she couldn’t help but wonder if her friend would ever be the same again.

\---

Adi Gallia was not only watching the Youngling standing in the centre of the room, but was also trying to gauge the reactions of her fellow Masters.

For the second time in the past few days, Mace had brought out the testing screen; a device they used to test the abilities of older candidates, typically three-year-olds like Kassandra. Though she hesitated on some of the answers, Adi guess it was most likely because she’d been kept inside all of her life and wasn’t as familiar with some items as most children were. But she still got them right after thinking about it.

“…ship …cup …chair …wolf.”

Mace put the screen down and gave Yoda a nod. The Grand Master of the Order considered Kassandra carefully, trying to determine what sort of question to ask her. Adi knew it wouldn’t be like the line of questioning he’d given to Anakin. Most Younglings who joined the Order at this age still had emotional attachments to their parents, something they would quickly grow out of.

“Feel, how do you?” Yoda finally asked.

Kassandra frowned. She clearly wasn’t used to Yoda’s backwards way of talking, so it took a few moments for her to realise what he was saying and reply. “Good. I like it here.”

“Do you miss your father?” asked Mace.

“A little. But Da goes away a lot,” the Youngling replied.

Adi worried that one of them might ask her ‘and what if he doesn’t come back?’ But it seemed they had more sense than they’d shown with Anakin (she still couldn’t believe they’d basically shamed a _nine-year-old_ for missing his mother), and instead moved the line of questioning in a different direction.

“Are you scared of your father, Kassandra?” asked Ki-Adi-Mundi.

The girl shook her head. “No. I’m not scared of Da.”

“Then scares you, what does? Hmm?” said Yoda.

Kassandra seemed to almost curl in on herself before replying with, “The bad man. Mama and Da scared of him.”

Realising who she was talking about, Adi asked, “Did you see him? What did he look like?”

She shook her head. It was obvious she didn’t like talking about the Sith Lord; like she was scared that merely mentioning his name summoned him. “Didn’t see him. Felt him. He was dark.”

All of the Masters exchanged glances. The Youngling showed fear, but none of them could fault a three-year-old girl for showing fear in the face of the Sith.

Yoda nodded his head. “Return to your mother, you can.”

The little girl didn’t waste any time in hurrying from the room. Adi caught a glimpse of Eldra greeting her child just outside the threshold before the door slid closed again.

It was Plo Koon who spoke first. “There appears to be no inherit darkness within her.”

“Striking, her Force signature is,” said Yaddle. “Not light, not dark. For both sides, a strong potential, she has.”

“She is Force-sensitive, and she is the correct age,” said Adi. “And with no evident corruption by the Sith, there is no good reason for us to turn her away. Eldra is right in one regard: if we do not accept her, there is a high chance the Sith will claim her.”

“I agree.” Eeth Koth nodded his head. “We cannot allow the Sith to gain anymore advantage than what they already have over us.”

“Then the question is,” said Even Piell, “what is to be done with Padawan Kaitis?”

“She has suffered a great ordeal,” Depa Billaba argued. “She did not have this child by choice. To turn her away because of circumstances beyond her control would be unfair.”

“But she chose to lay with the Sith,” Yarael Poof.

“She is still so young, and the Sith was young, too,” said Oppo Rancisis. “They may have been trained in the ways of the Jedi and the Sith, but forcing two youngsters together under the same roof? I would be more surprised if this _didn’t_ happen.”

“Perhaps, but it is clear she may still have conflicted feelings for this young Sith Lord,” said Saesee Tiin.

“She chose to escape the first chance she got,” Depa continued to argue. “It is clear that whatever feelings she has for him, she refused to let them cloud her judgement. With the right therapy, she can be helped.”

Adi cleared her throat. “I put forwards to this Council that Eldra Kaitis should be made a Knight of the Order. Her ordeal has allowed her to pass her five Trials. She has spent five years constantly sparring against a Sith Lord strong enough to defeat two Jedi Masters, one of whom was the Order’s Battlemaster – that is the Trial of Skill. She has faced the many perils of her captivity without ever giving into her fear, and she not only got herself out alive, but her daughter, too – that is the Trial of Courage. Through great pain, she has discovered who she is and what she is capable of – that is the Trial of Spirit. She was able to escape through cunning, and came up with a plan in a very short time frame once she’d seen the weakness in her prison – that is the Trial of Insight. And finally, not only has she overcome the loss of the Force bond she shared with the Sith, but she is willing to break contact with her daughter if that’s what it takes to keep her safe – that is the Trial of the Flesh.”

Silence fell over the Council chambers. Adi could tell that none of them could argue against her points; Eldra had endured her Trials of Knighthood, and had passed them.

Ki-Adi-Mundi broke the silence. “None of us feel that she does not deserve the title of Knight. But that is not the concern here.”

“If she remains in the Order, then she will be in close quarters with her daughter,” said Mace. “And I do not think I need to remind any of you of what happened the last time a mother and her child lived under the same roof.”

On the surface, the two situations appeared similar. But… “The case surrounding Yula Braylon and her son, Arath Tarrex, was much different,” said Adi. “For one, no one knew except for Yula herself, therefore no one could monitor the situation. And secondly, Yula integrated herself into her child’s life, not only spoiling him but also informing him of their connection. As a result, Arath grew up thinking himself special, and thinking he could get away with all sorts of things because of who his mother was. Eldra has stated that she is willing to break contact with her child, and I believe she will keep to her word. And since we are aware of the situation, we can monitor it accordingly.”

“I agree with Adi,” said Depa. “And I think we owe it not just to Eldra, but to Lorn Pavan as well. Whoever was in charge of his family’s case made a grave error in how they handled it. We could have simply kept them apart and avoided the entire incident.”

“Eldra and Kassandra deserve this chance, after everything they’ve been through,” Adi continued. “I think it’s incredible that Eldra didn’t even come close to falling to the dark side. She suffered so much, yet came out of it stronger. And I believe she will keep her distance for the sake of her daughter.”

Yoda scratched his chin. “Vote on the matter, we will.”

\---

The coffin chamber before her was silent and still. Not that Eldra expected it to be any different, but it just felt so… final.

Her master had achieved so much, and at the end of that road, she was just a body lying in the dark while her consciousness was one with the Force. Eldra closed her eyes and finally allowed herself to make peace with the death of Leora Ori.

Beside her, Kassandra was clutching her hand and staring down at the coffin chamber with a frown on her face. Eldra had already explained what it was, but her daughter was still trying to process the concept of death. Which made Eldra all the more certain that she shouldn’t tell her child about what had happened to her father. At least, not until she was older.

If she even got the chance to speak to her again.

The summoning gong sounded, and Eldra knew it was meant for her. She was being called back into the Council chambers.

“Come on, Kassie. Time to go.” After giving her master’s final resting place one last look, Eldra turned and led her daughter away.

The short walk back to the Council chambers was silent. When they reached the door, Eldra knelt in front of her daughter and said, “Kassie, I need you to wait outside for me. I won’t be long, OK?”

“OK, Mama.” Kassandra hopped up onto the sofa in the waiting area and began to patiently swing her legs back and forth.

Taking a breath of courage, Eldra entered the chambers.

Once she was standing in the centre and had bowed to them, Yoda spoke first. “Come to an agreement, the Council has.”

“You have survived a terrible ordeal,” said Master Windu. “And because of this, you are to be granted the rank of Knight.”

Eldra tried not to let her surprise show. She had been certain that after hearing her story, they would have turned her away for simply associating with a Sith in any positive way, no matter the circumstances. But this decision gave her hope that perhaps they weren’t as strict as she’d feared they would be; a fear that had been fuelled by the experiences of Lorn Pavan.

She bowed once again. “Thank you, Masters. But what of Kassandra?” If they were accepting her back, surely that couldn’t mean they were denying her daughter…?

“We have agreed that the wisest course of action would be to accept her for training,” said Adi, and Eldra felt the relief wash over her. “But we must take steps to ensure that an attachment doesn’t develop between the two of you.”

Mace continued, “You must have no contact with you daughter unless there is a medical emergency that demands your presence. When she is ready to become a Padawan, you will not be allowed to train her yourself. We can only accept her for training if these conditions are met. Do you agree with them?”

Even though she had been the one to suggest this arrangement, it had been out of desperation. But now, facing the reality of having no contact with her daughter for the rest of her childhood… It felt as though her already battered heart was being torn out of her chest. She wanted to deny that Maul’s death had affected her, but it had. She’d lost him, and now she was losing Kassandra, too.

But she fully understood why the conditions were necessary. It was the Jedi way. And it was the only way to keep her daughter safe from the Sith Lord still at large.

She released her sorrow and grief into the Force and nodded her head. “I agree.”

As she left the chambers to return to her daughter – possibly for the last time – Eldra found herself reaching up to caress the garnet necklace she still wore. Kassandra would be a Jedi, something Maul would have hated. But then, he was dead.

Eldra took some comfort from the fact that neither she nor Kassandra would have to worry about him ever again. 


	25. Epilogue: Willpower

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I mentioned before, this is only the first story in a series. The next one is on the way, but I want to finish it first before I begin posting. I'll try not to keep you all waiting too long. :) 
> 
> Oh, and sorry that the beginning quote is longer than usual. I couldn't cut it down.

And you rage and scream and reach through the Force to crush the shadow who has destroyed you, but you are so far less now than what you were, you are more than half machine, you are like a painter gone blind, a composer gone deaf, you can remember where the power was but the power you can touch is only a memory, and so with all your world-destroying fury it is only droids around you that implode, and equipment, and the table on which you were strapped shatters, and in the end, you cannot touch the shadow. In the end you don’t even want to.

In the end, the shadow is all you have left. Because the shadow understands you, the shadow forgives you, the shadow gathers you unto itself.

And within your furnace heart, you burn in your own flame.

– “Revenge of the Sith”, _Matthew Stover_

\---

“Far above… far below… We don’t know where we’ll fall…”

His legs were gone.

“Far above… far below… What once was great is rendered small.”

Those were the words he repeated, over and over, as he drew upon the dark side of the Force to keep himself alive.

Everything had happened so fast. His victory over the Jedi had been all but assured, but in seconds that victory had been snatched from him and then he was falling. Down, down, down towards the reactor.

“Far above… far below…”

Maul had barely managed to grab the air vent that had been the key to his survival. He’d helplessly watched his legs tumble down towards the reactor.

“We don’t know where we’ll fall…”

It was a long, slow, agonising crawl along the ventilation shaft. The only exit led him into a trash container.

“Far above… far below…”

And only when he was lying there among the garbage that everything hit him.

“What once was great is rendered small.”

He had failed his master.

He had failed his family.

With the desperation of a potentially dying man, he dug into his robes. When his fingertips touched the paper, he felt a small moment of content that the picture was still there.

It didn’t last long. The burning need for his family overwhelmed him.

He needed to get back to them… He needed to keep them safe…

There was no way out of the container. And even if there was, he couldn’t get very far without his legs. He wasn’t strong enough to get out, wasn’t strong enough to protect them from the Jedi and his master…

His master. Sidious would never take him back after his failure.

Maul began to shake with terror at the thought of Sidious near his family. There was the old fear of his master taking Kassandra, but instead he was filled with a new fear, because in order for his master’s plans to continue on schedule he needed an adult apprentice, not another child, so he would have no use for Kassandra and no time to train her as an assassin while he focussed on his next apprentice, and Eldra would go down fighting, protecting her daughter, so Sidious would kill them both and Maul could do nothing to stop him, he was helpless, powerless, he hated his master, he hated the Jedi, he hated, he hated…

Kenobi.

“Far above…”

The young Jedi’s face was the last face he saw before he plunged.

“…far below…”

Obi-Wan Kenobi had bested him. A Jedi Padawan, like Eldra – a friend of Eldra, no less.

“We don’t know where we’ll fall…”

Maul should have defeated him. He’d slaughtered Qui-Gon Jinn, a Jedi _Master_. The Padawan should have been easy.

“Far above… far below…”

And yet there he was, lying amongst the discarded waste.

“What once was great…”

Obi-Wan Kenobi had denied him his destiny as a Sith. Obi-Wan Kenobi had stopped him from protecting those he cared for. Obi-Wan Kenobi had condemned them to die.

“…is rendered small.”

And one day, Maul would have his revenge. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A long time ago, before Disney bought Star Wars (but only just before, I think), I read a story on FanFic dot Net that was only a few chapters long, but had so much potential to be awesome. Maul had a daughter with some random slave lady who then died in childbirth, and he was terrified that Sidious would take her away. But then after he was defeated on Naboo, Obi-Wan found the child and decided to bring her to the Jedi Temple out of guilt for killing her father. 
> 
> The story ended there, but the sequel held so much promise. The girl would become a Jedi, Obi-Wan would become her master in the Clone Wars, Maul would return... and discover that his child is being trained by the man who cut him in half. The drama basically wrote itself. The story was left hanging for a while, but I was willing to be patient. 
> 
> But then the story vanished. Along with the author's profile page. I searched all over the internet for it, but couldn't find it anywhere, and it didn't help that by that time I'd forgotten the daughter's name. It was a shame, because I'd never seen a Maul story with that premise before. So, after realising that I'd probably never find the story - I decided to write my own version. 
> 
> The notes have been sitting on my laptop for years. Over time the story has turned into much more than what the original was; the daughter's name kept changing, the ending kept changing. After the Maul comic came out, I decided to make Eldra the mother, adding a Jedi/Sith forbidden romance to the plot, along with keeping her alive when I realised that would be far more interesting instead of her pulling a Padme. Now, the story is far longer than I originally intended, and a lot different than what the original was. 
> 
> I guess what I'm saying is, if the original author is out there and reading this... I hope you don't mind me borrowing your story idea and crafting it into my own version of it. Maybe one day you can finish yours too. :)


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